


Four Letters

by Random_Inked_Thoughts



Series: Supernatural Soulmate AU [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Cas trying to propose, Castiel and Dean Winchester are Cute, Castiel and Dean Winchester in Love, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Child Abuse, Couch Cuddles, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dean is Loved, Destiel - Freeform, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Established Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Give Jack all the hugs, Human Castiel, Human Gabriel (Supernatural), Jack is adjusting, Jack's pain is offically over, Jealous Lucifer, John Winchester and Mary Winchester are Divorced, Love, Loving Marriage, M/M, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, Oh yeah Sam and Gabe are doing ok as well, Sabriel - Freeform, Self-Harm, Sleepy Castiel, Sleepy Cuddles, Soulmates, Tattoos, Therapy, Verbal Abuse, basically no one but Dean and Cas are happy, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-05-23 04:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14927135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Random_Inked_Thoughts/pseuds/Random_Inked_Thoughts
Summary: In a world where fate itself decided who you love, Castiel has to deal with the four letters that have been printed on his arm since birth. He's become no less than an outcast thanks to him not being able to find the so called "love of his life." All of that changes one night in a random bar. The course of Cas' life is dramatically altered in a second, thanks to those four letters.





	1. Exposition

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome! I've posted this elsewhere, under the same name, so don't be alarmed if you see it there too. I also added some random friends in to help with plot. They aren’t very important, and aren’t part of Supernatural. (IMPORTANT FOR THE STORY: unmatched means that one person has either no tattoo, or has a tattoo, but the person they were supposed to be with has a completely separate soulmate.)
> 
> Come visit me on Tumblr: Randomfandomginger !

 

-Six years old-

 

“So guys, who did you get?” Cas looked up at Gabriel, his older brother, as he grinned wildly and plopped back down onto the couch. All of his friends sat around him, either lounging on the couch or floor. 

 

“Mine’s going to be called Lisa!” One of the new friends that Gabriel brought home that day, Andrew, boasted, as he showed off to them the name written on his wrist. “I bet she’ll be lovely.”

 

“Oh yeah?” Well I got Ann-Marie!” Another one chimed in. His name was Thomas, if Cas could remember correctly. He gazed around with wide eyes at the teenagers surrounding him.

 

“Mine’s name is Rick.” The girl in the group split into a wide grin, glancing nervously at the boy sitting across the circle from her and pulling up her T-shirt sleeve to reveal it. 

 

“Ooh, Rick, who do you have?” Gabe smirked at the blushing boy sitting to his right, teasing him, as he already knowing the answer, as did Castiel. 

 

“Tabitha.” He whispered quietly, pulling up his pant leg so they could see the purple name written on his ankle. 

 

Tabitha was apparently that girl’s name because she blushed as the other teenagers began to tease the two of them. 

 

“What about you Gabe?” Rick chimed in, trying to change the subject. 

 

Gabe smirked. “I got one named Sam.” He pulled up his shirt to show them the name written on his stomach. “I’m sure she’ll be even prettier than any of yours.” He laughed. 

 

“Nuh uh!” Andrew gasped. “I’m sure Lisa will be the prettiest!” 

 

“Tabitha’s right here with us and she’s clearly the most stunning girl I’ve ever seen!” Rick chimed in, and they all began to argue, Cas’s head swiveling back and forth as the conversation’s volume raised with every passing moment. 

 

_ Cassie, you can play with the big kids if you’re good. _ Gabriel’s voice rang through Cas’ head. He wanted to participate too.

 

“Mine’s name is Bean and he’ll be the prettiest of all the girls because that’s what Mommy says!” Cas yelled out, and the group stopped, turning to look at him. He slowly turned red at all the attention, squirming under their gazes. 

 

Then, Andrew burst out laughing, slapping his knee. “Oh my god, he’s gay!” Andrew burst out, then cracked up even more.

 

“And what’s so bad about that?” Gabe’s cool voice rang out, and Andrew froze. “I hope you didn’t just do what I think you did, because it almost, just almost, sounded like you were making fun of my little brother.”

 

All of the laughter died out, and Andrew looked at the floor. “Get out of my house.” Gabe said. 

 

When he left, and the others departed soon after, Cas climbed onto Gabe’s lap. “Gabriel, what does gay mean?” He cocked his head, looking up at his older brother. 

 

“It means, my little cherub, that you are the happiest person alive.” Gabe hugged him closely to his chest.

 

-Twelve years old-

Castiel looked once more at the stylish calligraphy rolling down his left forearm. It was in a bright emerald green. Four letters. Four letters that had appeared from the moment he was conceived, four letters that had seemed so harmless when he shared with friends. Four letters that had changed his life. 

 

_ If only mine had appeared somewhere I could hide it…  _ Little twelve year old Cas thought.  _ Anna had hers on the back of her neck.  _

 

Quickly, he walked down the hall to that horrid class. Entering the room, he ducked his head low, but still, the teacher noticed him, and called out, “Hello, Castiel! Late to class again?” 

 

“Sorry Mr. Dean.” Cas muttered, and the whole class broke out into ripples of laughter. Self consciously, he hid his arm behind his back. 

 

Mr Dean frowned at the class. “Now kids, that’s not very nice of you.” Easy for him to say. His soulmate’s name stood out on his neck, clear as day. Cas had met her once this year already, Ellen had brought in cookies to share with the whole class. 

 

Cas slowly took his seat, ears burning a bright crimson, and pulled out a notebook. Suddenly, he felt a sharp prod in his side, and a note was passed up to him. Opening it slowly, he scanned it. 

 

The note read something along the lines of  _ Hey, it’s ok, I’ve had a girl’s name written on my arm my whole life. It’s not all bad. I haven’t met her yet, but I’m sure I will, just like you’ll meet your Dean one day, and that’s the part that’s worth it. Just hold out until then. Kids are jerks. Sincerely, the ginger sitting behind you _

_ PS- Wanna have lunch together?  _

 

With a kind of a smile, he nodded his head once, and he could almost feel her smile from behind him, even though he hadn’t turned around once since the school year started. He just had to make it through middle school… 

 

-Sixteen years old-

 

Sixteen year old Cas rolled his eyes and popped his gum as he shoved people out of his way. He flipped his blue dyed hair out of his face as he reached his locker, where he found a really special ginger waiting for him. 

 

“Cas!” Charlie hugged him. “Long time no see.” She giggled. It was a new year again, and Cas only had to keep this up for a few more years before he was free. 

 

“Charlie.” He gave her a small smirk. 

 

“Oh don’t you Charlie me Mr!” She laughed. “I saw you all summer! And, I know you only have to do this when people are here.” 

 

The corner of his mouth twitched, and her eyes lit up. “You know what this means?”

 

When he said nothing in reply, she bounced a few times. “This means we can start up my favorite game! Try and make Cas break character.” Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she mentally prepared herself. “I’m gonna do it this year!” 

 

“Sure Charlie. Let’s get to class in the meantime, shall we?” Cas pulled the one long glove he wore up higher on his arm so that not one tiny bit of the tattoo that haunted him could be seen. 

 

When they stepped into the class, the first thing he saw was the seating chart, projected onto the front wall. Luckily for him, he was at a table with Charlie, but also, he was at a table with some boy named Dean. His heart stopped, and he could hear Charlie’s sharp intake of breath from next to him. 

 

Shooting her a glance, he sat down next to the boy dubbed “Dean.” 

 

The boy glanced at him. “So.” He spoke in a very deep voice. “You must be Castiel?” 

 

“Y-yes.” Cas stammered out. Charlie slipped a hand onto his knee under the table.  _ Breathe,  _ her voice seemed to say-  _ he might be the one. _

 

“So are you two soul mates, or what?” Dean from his table asked, seeing the subtle movement. Charlie quickly removed her hand. 

 

“God no, I’m a lesbian.” She laughed. “What about you, Dean Bean?” 

 

He rolled his eyes. “Class is starting.” 

 

“Good morning class!” Their teacher was a young man, full of pep and enthusiasm. “Let’s start out with a simple ‘get to know you’ exercise! All you have to do is tell as much of your soulmate’s name as you want to, spelled out. Isn’t that fun?” He grinned, waiting for scattered smiles, even though this activity was done every year, and this was high school. “The least you can say is one letter.” 

 

Cas’ breath hitched, and he slowly watched student’s different reactions, ranging from one girl crying out “Kevin!” to some others slowly whispering out “L…” 

 

When it was Dean’s turn to go, he rolled his eyes, and drawled, “C-A.” Even though Cas scrutinized his every move, Dean's face portrayed no emotion.

 

Charlie shot him a quick look as she said a few letters of hers, and then it was his turn. Trying not to make eye contact with the boy next to him, he slowly whispered out “D.”

 

The moment the lunch bell rang, he bolted, Charlie running to try and keep up. He didn’t stop until he was safely at his lunch table. 

 

“What are you doing?” She cried out to him. “He could be the one!” Then, her expression changed from confusion to glee as a shadow fell over him. “I’ll just go and get my lunch then.” She grinned. “Buh bye!” And then she sped off, leaving him to turn around slowly to the shadow of a man behind him. 

 

“Hello Dean.” He looked slowly at the floor, slowly moving his eyes up, admiring his bright blue eyes that so nicely mirrored his own at last.

 

“It’s my name isn’t it.” Dean’s voice was harsh, his tanned skin flushing the lightest bit. 

 

Cas gulped slightly, nodding a little, and slowly moved the glove down so it scrunched at the base of his hand. 

 

Dean’s eyes hardened in annoyance as he looked it over. He pulled his shirt to the side slowly, revealing more than just the first few letters. Calypso. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Cas whispered. “It’s not you, I’ll just,” He tried to move past him, but Dean grabbed him. 

 

“No. You are not going to walk around this school with my name on your forearm, you hear me? Cover it up. I’m head of the football team, and I do not need a rumor that one of those broken unmatching freak cases is gay for me, you hear me?” He growled. “You keep that ugly thing covered, or else.”

 

Cas couldn’t do anything but gulp and not, his throat closing up and tears stinging in his eyes as Dean walked away. He slowly pulled up the glove on his wrist and got up and left the seat.  _ How self centered was he, to assume he’s the only Dean there is to love…  _

 

That night, he got a call from Charlie, who he didn’t see after lunch. “It wasn’t him, Charlie.” He whispered into the phone. Then, he hung up. 

 

Rolling over, he started searching online for something. 

 

Gabe walked into his room later to tell him he was going out for his night shift and saw him passed out on his bed, light from his laptop illuminating his face. He walked over, and his whole face tightened, jaw clenching. Slowly and firmly, he closed the computer screen and tucked Cas in. 

 

KEYWORD: Soul mate tattoo laser removal 

 

-Eighteen years old-

 

Castiel still walked the halls, Charlie at his side. Blue hair faded to  silver, which in turn became red. The black glove still covered his arm, his face still remained passive. 

 

Charlie sighed. “Another year, another waste. At least we’re seniors now, right?” She tried to crack a grin for the sake of her friend, but he simply put his hand on top of her head, a gesture that she could tell meant more and more each time he did it, a certain kind of 'I love you'. 

 

They stepped into his french class, and the teacher, a stout older woman, smiled at them, her turquoise soulmate tattoo glinting on her cheek. “I’ve assigned you all seats by first name, which I understand is becoming more and more common these days.” She smiled as she examined the list, pointing out his seat before exclaiming, “This does seem to be a very special class. We have three young men by the name of Dean this year! Wow!” 

 

Castiel put his head down on the desk he sat down at and tried not to cry. He could hear whispers from all over the classroom. 

 

“Of course they’d put CASTIEL in front of all the Deans.” 

 

“Oh, is that the kid who thought he would be with the football captain?” 

 

“I hear he had a crush on Mr Dean, his teacher, and it was an unmatched tattoo because the teacher was already married.”

 

“No, I thought that was just a rumor.”

 

“This kid wears that black glove everywhere because he hates the word engraved on his own skin.” 

 

Charlie stood up then, glaring at as many people as she could. “If you all want to fight me, you can! Leave him alone!” 

 

By the time Cas was trudging home, he was feeling the worst he had felt since that night when he was sixteen. It didn’t help that Gabe, stopping by, brought all sorts of photos from Rick and Tabitha’s wedding to show him. 

 

“Look Cassie!” He exclaimed, excited. ‘In this one, we’re drenching Rick’s suit with ice water! And here’s the cake photos, and look, that's where I was! I was the best men.” He smiled fondly.

 

“That’s real nice Gabe.” Cas looked down at the floor. “Congrats.”

 

“I know they were only twenty three, but why wait any longer? I mean, they’re practically, well, soulmates!” He laughed. 

 

Cas went to bed with heavy eyelids and an even heavier heart.

 

-Twenty Four years old-

 

Cas sat on a bar stool, a light stubble on his face. He had donned his trench coat, a gift from Gabriel that he ended up loving more than life itself. This also meant he didn’t have to wear the glove, and didn’t feel people’s stares, biting into the back of his head. 

 

Most people found their soulmate between the ages of twelve and eighteen. It was just how it worked. He had come to terms with the fact that maybe, just maybe, he was an unmarked, maybe there really was no one out there for him.

 

Sighing, he raised his hand to signal the bartender for a drink, looking around sullenly. Nothing very interesting here, not many people. 

 

He got his drink, and sipped it slowly, 

 

From the corner, he heard a drunk female voice call out, “Hey, pretty boy, you, over there!” She was calling out to a man about Cas’ age with short dirty blonde hair and viridian green eyes. He wore a brown leather coat, and had an almost inhumanly symmetrical face. 

 

Slowly, he turned around from a few feet away. 

 

“You wanna go out with me?” She giggled and hiccupped a bit. 

 

“Ma’am you need to go home and go to sleep.” He looked her over disapprovingly, sipping from his own glass as he did. 

 

“MMh. What’s your name?” She walked over and sat down next to him, smiling an innocent sort of smile. 

 

“...Dean.” 

 

That was when Castiel started to really pay attention, the tattoo on his arm burning a little. The more he watched the conversation out of the corner of his eye, he was  _ not  _ stalking, the more he decided he needed to interfere. 

 

He got up and crossed the room in a few strides, putting his left arm around the man’s shoulders, forearm facing in, tattoo clear as day with the trenchcoat sleeve pulled up. “Hey sweetie.” He grinned at him. “Sorry I’m late to meet you, traffic was murder.”

 

Dean’s eyes found his, and they just screamed  _ thank you.  _ “It’s ok angel.” He responded. “What matters is that you’re here now.” 

 

“Who’s your friend?” The woman asked, looking Dean head to toe. “I don’t see your tattoo.” 

 

“Um… this is Castiel.” Dean told her, just going off of the name on his right bicep, which he turned slightly to reveal. “But I just call him Cas.” 

 

Cas’ eyes widened. “Yes.” he heard himself say. “I am Castiel.”

 

A few seconds later, when neither of them budged, the woman took one last look at Dean, then walked away, grumbling to herself.

 

“Thanks buddy, if you weren’t here I would have been toast.” Dean grinned at him. “I’m lucky that you’re going to meet a Dean that the universe thinks you should be together forever with.” He chuckled. “Oh, where are my manners! My name’s Dean Winchester, nice to meet you.” He held out his hand.

 

“Castiel Novak.” Cas heard himself reply, in a daze, and saw Dean’s eyes widen, taking his hand back. His eyes were just as calculating. If he had been waiting half as long as Castiel, he knew Dean would also be skeptical. 

 

“As opposed to an awkward handshake, how about we just go out to dinner or something?” Dean finally asked, “I feel like I need to get to know you a bit better, right now.”

 

Cas’ face split into a grin, and for the first time in a very long time, he didn’t feel ashamed of what had been with him his whole life. "I would love that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note from 2018 Ginger: Okay, so going back and reading through my old work (this first chapter is a year old, can you believe it?) I realize that major chunks of this story need editing, and I need to seriously re-do the exposition chapter. Stay tuned for that, people, and don't let me forget! :)


	2. First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Christmas chapter in June! Whee!

-First Date-

 

Dean’s breath was clear in the air between them, his heart still sparking with adrenaline as he looked the man he was next to over. His piercing blue eyes seemed tired, yet somehow, ancient and wise at the same time. He had rolled his trench coat sleeves back down, since it was quite chilly out, mid-winter, but Dean could almost still see the tattoo on his wrist, a comforting feeling. 

 

That was when Cas’ face turned, and his eyes met Dean’s, that Dean felt it. He could be the one, easily. His tattoo sparked  happily under Cas' gaze.

 

“Dean?” Cas’ gruff voice rang out, his eyes turning inquisitive. 

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Where are we actually going to eat?” Cas sounded tentative as he asked, not wanting to overstep his boundaries, but his stomach was rumbling. 

 

“Oh shoot.” Dean muttered. Since they had left the bar, they had just been wandering around in the middle of the town, looking at all the christmas lights and trees and other christmas stuff people had hung up. “I figured maybe we could walk around for a little bit first, you know, see the sights, smile at the strangers, do the things…” He trailed off.

 

“Ok.” Cas smiled and slipped his hand slowly, tentatively, into Dean’s, squeezing it slightly. Dean couldn’t help but notice how well Cas’ slightly smaller hand seemed to fit into his perfectly, and how warm his hand was. “So where to first?” 

 

“Have you done your Christmas shopping yet?” Dean asked. 

 

Castiel shrugged. “Haven’t needed to before today. No one special.” This made Dean’s heart both flutter with a kind of middle school crush happiness and crumble a bit with compassion and sorrow for the man next to him. “How about you?” Cas whispered, wanting to change the topic. 

 

It was well known that occasionally, those who were unmatched, or thought they were unmatched, would date or even marry others without their name on them. This was considered dishonorable in their society, and couples that were unmatched were often given even fewer rights than gay couples, or not even recognised as couples at all.

 

“Once.” Dean paused for a moment, and then turned to Cas, contemplating how much he wanted to tell the man he would probably spend the rest of his life with. 

 

_ Twenty year old Dean sat on the steps of his house, arms crossed angrily, glaring at his younger brother. “I don’t care Sammy, I love her!” _

 

_ “Dean, come on…” Sam, sixteen at that time, held his arms out pleadingly. “People are talking, and you know that never ends well.” _

 

_ “Screw what the people say! I don’t care what they say, I love Cassie and she loves me!” Dean roared at him.  _

 

_ “Dean. She knows that you don’t have her name on your arm.” Sam tried to cut in. “Besides, you didn’t let me finish. I was trying to tell you she wasn’t a good idea because-”  _

 

_ “You just don’t like her because she dropped out of high school and I met her at the bar!” Dean cried out. “Besides, the name on my arm never mattered to her! She said it was what was inside of me that counts!” _

 

_ “Dean.” Sam closed his eyes briefly. “She never shows you the name on her skin. You don’t even know where it is. Why wouldn’t she? You’ve been more open with her than anyone except maybe me.”  _

 

_ “I don’t know, man! Hell, Castiel never showed up and I’m pretty pissed with him, so I understand why she wouldn’t want to talk about the one person she expected to show up at some point. All he had to do was show up, Sammy, that’s all he had to do, and he couldn’t even do that!” Hot tears started to trace their way down Dean’s cheeks, and he wiped them away in his anger without even noticing. _

 

_ Sam looked taken aback, and then just really angry, but not at Dean. “I know Dean, I know.” He slowly put his arm around Dean’s shoulders, and comforted his shaking brother. He never showed this much emotion before. “I’m sorry.”  _

 

“Dean…” Cas looked at him, and realized that the man next to him clearly hadn’t intended to tell him that part, he just kind of kept talking. “What happened to her?” He asked gently. 

 

“The name on her back?” Dean’s voice grew a bit colder. “Her ‘best friend,’ the bartender. They had been in a relationship for years, and she was just playing around with me. They had a few good laughs about me behind my back.”

 

“Oh Dean…” Cas muttered. “I am so sorry…” He looked at Dean, so open and hurt behind him, and he squeezed his hand. And then, he began to speak. His deep gravelly voice soothed Dean, even as he recounted stories of his own pain and hurt, and of when he was six, and he didn’t understand all of this. He'd since had his eyes opened to the cruel reality. 

 

“I called you the prettiest of all the girls.” Cas smiled a little at that memory. “Guess I got one thing right. 

 

Dean chuckled softly and kissed the top of his head. 

 

Cas moved on to when he was twelve, and the class teased him nonstop. He was the kid with a teacher’s name on his arm. That made him the kid to bully. 

 

“But that was when I met Charlie.” He rolled his eyes a bit at the memory. “She was crazy and funny and understood me. I think you’d like her.” 

 

“Mmh I’m sure I would.” Dean looked down at him, and all traces of his past pain vanished by this point. “I’m glad you had someone. I at least always had Sammy.” 

 

Cas nodded, and continued, pouring out his heart to Dean, bringing him back to a time when Cas was an awkward sixteen year old, and thought he had found the one. 

 

“He called it ugly,” Cas whispered, speaking about his tattoo, “And that was the first night, I started to see it as something of an abomination, rather than a mildly annoying and embarrassing fact of life. I…” He took a deep breath. “I considered laser tattoo removal for the first time that night.” He looked up nervously at Dean, who’s eyes widened, horrified that anyone would drive this precious angel next to him to such thoughts. 

 

“If I was there, I would have given him the old one two, ya know?” Dean tried to crack a grin, and Cas let out a small grin.

 

“Come on, you need some hot chocolate.” He dragged Cas into a coffee shop, proceeded to sit him at a small cozy corner of the cafe, march to the front, and order something, looking very important while doing so. 

 

A few moments later, he returned to Cas holding two topless cups of steaming hot chocolate, piled high with whipped cream. “You know, I never really thanked you for saving me at that bar earlier tonight. Properly, of course.” 

 

“What better way than a steaming hot chocolate?” Cas smiled that adorable smile again, and Dean’s heart melted. 

 

They sat there for a minute, sipping their hot chocolate, content in their silence, just feeling each other’s presence. 

 

Finally looking up, Dean cracked a grin at Cas, seeing him with a small whipped cream mustache. 

 

“What is it Dean?” Cas looked slightly confused, just making Dean’s grin wider. 

 

“You have a little something…” Dean trailed off, and then suddenly, pushing himself closer to Cas across the table, slowly touched his lips with his finger, wiped the whipped cream away. 

 

“Dean…” Cas whispered, staring into his eyes. Slowly then, he closed them, leaning in, as Dean did the same.

 

That was their first kiss.

 

As they parted, A warm blush spread out on both of their cheeks, and Dean let out a small cough.

 

“Well, that was pretty cliche.” He said, and seeing Cas’ face fall a little, finished his sentence. “Now usually, I’m one to hate on that kind of thing, but I’ve gotta say, I would do it again in a heartbeat.’

 

Cas’ face seemed to light up, and he shyly slid a piece of paper across the table. He had scrawled his number hastily across it. “Call me?” He asked tentatively. “I have some ideas if you would like a second date.”

 

Dean’s smile alone would have been enough to convey that he would like that very, very much. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a little early, I know, but just because I couldn't wait to post the first chapter of the "real" story.


	3. Tiny Dates

-Second Date-

 

Cas pulled up outside of the beige stone building. He slowly closed his eyes, breathing out a quick anxious breath, and, before he could change his own mind, he exited the car and closed the door firmly. 

 

Walking inside was a roller coaster for Cas.  _ Meet me here. _ He had texted Dean, sending him a google location.  _ Wear casual clothing.  _

 

His heart jumped to his throat as he saw Dean sitting at a table inside, playing with the red and white checkered tablecloth. 

 

He looked up as Cas opened the door, and grinned. “Hey Cas!” He stood up. Dean was wearing a light grey T-shirt. This showed off just the bottom half of his tattoo. Cas felt himself blush as he looked Dean up and down. 

 

“Did you figure out where I took you?” He smiled slightly. 

 

Dean smirked. “I think I can probably make a reasonable guess.” He gestured at the flashing lights and dark tunnel leading to the back. Behind them, they could hear kids screaming and laughing, and some adults too. 

 

“Do- do you like it?” Cas looked tentatively at Dean’s almost unreadable face.  _ Oh god he doesn't like it, I can see it…  _

 

“Like it?” Dean’s deep voice rang out as Cas shuffled nervously. He laughed and grabbed Cas’ hand. “Like it? I love it! Lazer tag was my favorite as a kid!” 

 

_ Oh thank goodness.  _ Cas cracked a small grin. “You want to play?” 

 

“Hells yes I do!” Dean practically ran to the front desk. Looking up at the man there wearing a cheesy uniform, he froze. “You!” 

 

“Hey Dean-O!” Gabriel sat behind the front desk. “I was wondering how long it would take you to notice me.”

 

Cas walked up, a few steps behind Dean. “You know him?” He whipped his head around to almost glare at Gabe accusingly. “How long have you known him?” 

 

“It's ok Cas it's nothing personal he’s just dating my little bro.” Dean grinned at him, thinking he was jealous. “I literally found out about this yesterday when he walked in with Sam out of nowhere. I don't even know him that well.” His eyes narrowed. “Which means… he could be anyone.” 

 

“Yeah, chillax little bro.” Gabe let out a small laugh, but Cas could see in his eyes that he was not ready to reveal this information. Gabe cast his gaze downward, sticking a red lollipop in his mouth as he rang up their tickets.

 

“You're dating his younger brother? And you didn't think to tell me about this?” Cas growled quietly. 

 

“In my defense I didn't really know that he had an older brother. He didn't know about you either.” Gabe tried for another grin. 

 

“Wait what? You two are siblings?” Dean closed his eyes for a minute. “I never learned his last name…” he mumbled sheepishly. 

 

“Well, don't you two lovebirds let me hold you up.” Gabe smiled, ushering them away a little. “Go have fun.” He wanted them out of there, probably so he could call Sam and ask him why the heck he didn't mention he had an older brother. 

 

“Red or blue?” Cas held up two jackets. They were standing in a dark room with about fourteen other people. 

 

“Blue. Like your eyes.” Dean finally decided, grinning and winking at him, thought he probably couldn't see him anyway. 

 

Cas blushed and helped him slip the jacket on, turning a brilliant shade of red as he did. Unlike Dean, he was glad for the dark. Then, he slipped his on. Dean reached over and Cas nearly jumped out of his skin as Dean slowly slid the clip into place. 

 

“You ready?” Dean asked him, grinning.

 

“When am I not?” Cas smiled back, hiking his gun up on his hip and following Dean into the blackness.

 

-Fourth Date-

 

Cas slowly locked eyes with the man ahead of him, quietly calculating. Dean sat half on his lap, chewing on his fingernail. 

 

The bulging man across from them, more tattoo than skin, shot them another glare and flicked his cigarette from one side of his mouth to the other and clenched his cards closer to him, trying to figure out if Cas would accept however much he was going to raise.

 

The smoke, wafting through the air, made Cas want to gag.  _ Do it for Dean.  _ He breathed out slowly and swallowed, eyes flicking to the cards face up on the table. 

 

He had found, upon Dean taking him here to play, that he had a real knack for poker. He had won the last few rounds by sheer luck, and he even found himself enjoying it. That was, until this man, apparently the resident poker champion, had practically dragged him to the back room and demanded a match, since “not a single little novice poker bitch was gonna go on his territory, beat his men, and just leave.”

 

Cas glanced down at his hand, looking up at the man again, who simply grinned. 

 

“I’m all in.” The man boasted confidently, like he had already won. 

 

Cas’ brow furrowed even further, an action which he knew Dean adored. Glancing down at his cards, he tried to seem hesitant. 

 

“Well? Whatcha gonna do?” The man smirked. “Does your boyfriend have to make the choice for you?” 

 

“I guess I’ll play the same.” Cas sighed, pushing his chips in and setting his cards face down on the table. 

 

“You just made a big mistake kid.” The man smirked as he flipped down his cards face up on the table, but it was forced. 

 

“Actually, I think it’s you who has made the mistake.” Cas spoke out, straight faced, dropping his cards down on the table. “Royal flush.” 

 

He moved Dean off his lap by gently grabbing his hips, picked up the money, and turned to the exit. “By the way, you need to work on your bluffing. It was quite easy to see that you had nothing much of use.” 

 

The moment they stepped outside, Dean whirled around. “That was amazing Cas! Jesus Christ you were phenomenal! How did you do that? And I thought I was good at poker…” 

 

Cas smiled. “Honestly, Dean? I think it was you. You’re my good luck charm.”  _ I have no idea…  _ He stood on tiptoes and kissed Dean softly on the cheek. “Now what do you say we get out of here and do something with all this money.” 

 

“I concur. C’mon, I know a good burger joint out by Fifth.” 

 

Cas closed his eyes happily, intertwining his fingers with Dean’s.

 

-Sixth Date- 

 

A short  _ ding dong  _ at the door, and Dean opened it. Grinning. Also, covered in head to toe with flour. “Welcome to my humble abode.” 

 

Cas stared at him a minute before bursting out laughing. “Oh my god you said we would be making a cake, not wearing it!” 

 

“I may have dropped the flour on the way home from the store.” He scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. 

 

Just then, a tall man with longer brown hair walked into the room, equally covered in flour. “You owe me.” He rolled his eyes at Dean. Then he turned to Cas. “This idiot made me stay and help him clean up the disaster in my kitchen. Now I'm going to have to shower again! And I'll be late to meet Gabe!” He rolled his eyes and started to walk off. “Oh yeah welcome to the family Cas.” He called over his shoulder.

 

“Follow me.” Dean blushed and started walking through the hallway. 

 

When Cas reached the kitchen, he gasped. The general floor and such was clean. However, over most of the walls, counters, and even the ceiling was a thick coating of flour. 

 

Glancing into the large bag, he saw about a quarter of it left. “Oh my gosh how much flour did you buy?” He gasped.

 

“I'm not sure… I don't exactly bake much…” Dean looked around.

 

“Anything else you spilled that I should know about? Cas grinned. 

 

“Not that I know of.” Dean smirked. “I did spill about you to Sam, if that counts.” He started sifting through some of the flour in the bag. 

 

“Mmh.” Cas smiled at him and wrapped his arms around his waist from behind, scarcely realizing what he was doing.  _ Is he ok with this?  _ Trying to gauge his reaction, he put his head onto his shoulder. “Sift a little more, then we can move on to the other wet ingredients.” 

 

“Ok Angel, whatever you say.” Dean replied, leaning into him a little. 

 

That was how Sam found them later, Cas behind his older brother, steadying his hand as Dean nervously whisked the batter for some sort of cake together. 

 

“Like this, Cas?” He heard his older brother ask, and he received a happy nod from the man beside him.

 

Sam smiled a moment, grabbed his coat off of the hook, and slowly closed the door so as not to disturb the two lovebirds. 

 

He narrowly missed Dean turning around and slowly capturing Cas’ lips in a kiss. 

 

Cas blushed heavily before responding. “What was that for?” 

 

“For helping me bake Sammy a birthday cake.” Dean smiled at him. Suddenly, he seemed to grow a bit more nervous. “Did you like it?” 

 

In response, Cas pulled him down for another kiss. 

 

-Eight Date- 

 

“You know,” Dean commented, trying to sound offhand, “Christmas is coming up…” 

 

“Oh?” Cas looked up at him from his position in his lap, throwing some popcorn into his mouth. “Whatcha trying to say?” He grinned. 

 

His relationship with Dean had grown substantially over the course of these last two weeks. They had been out to dinner several times, or found little excuses to meet each other in the supermarket or in certain instances when Dean had to walk Sam’s dog, Bones, and Cas just happened to be walking through the area. Even when they weren’t seeing each other in person, they had been texting constantly. 

 

“So… I was wondering if this weekend you would like to have dinner at my place? With my family? For Christmas?” He asked. Then, he hurried to add, “Unless of course you have family you’d rather be with.” 

 

Cas smiled. “Well, I know Gabe will be there anyway. I don’t get along with the rest of my family half as well as I get along with you.” He reached his finger up and bopped Dean on the nose. “And of course I would love to come.” 

 

Dean smiled. “How did an unlucky guy like me end up with an actual angel like you?” 

 

Cas chuckled. “I’m no angel Sweetie.” 

 

Dean traces the tattoo that snaked down Cas’ forearm. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” 

 

Cas leaned into him, closing his eyes, content in his company.  _ I wish I could stay like this forever… _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well! I swear the writing only gets better from here. This was written about half a year ago, so yeah.


	4. Thanksgiving Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Christmas chapter... in June!

-Beforehand-

 

Practically running, Cas vaulted over his bed, almost flying face first into his closet as he did so. Fancy shirts and pants covered his floor, and he had a large selection of ties of all colors covering every other open surface. 

 

“Hey little bro- woah what the heck is this?” Cas looked up to see his older sister Anna standing in his doorway. She was over for the holiday festivities, and right now, she was staring wide eyed at his usually spotless room. 

 

“Go away Anna…” he muttered. “Please.” He added as an afterthought. He loved his sister, but he didn't have the time right now.

 

“Is this about this Dean I keep hearing about?” Anna smirked at him. "Have you finally found him?" When he said nothing, she smiled. “It is! Isn’t it?” 

 

“Anna, unless you’re going to help-“ then Cas’ eyes widened and he whirled around to face her. “You  _can_ help! Quick, which do you think he’ll like better? White or blue?” He held up two shirts, one as pale as his face, the other a deep navy blue.

 

Anna chuckled and rolled her eyes at his antics, those of a child with a crush. “White. Your tie is already blue.” She looked him over as he slipped a beige coat off of its hanger. “Really? You’re going for the tax accountant look?” 

 

“I like the coat. Dean got it for me.” Cas pouted a little. Indeed, when Dean had noticed his old coat wearing a little thin, he had gone out and purchased him a new one, even though Cas had insisted he had more than enough money, and that Dean should save his. 

 

“You little sap.” Anna chuckled. “Fine. Have fun.” She left the room, but not before patting him on the shoulder. "Go get 'em tiger."

 

Cas threw on the beige coat, looked at himself in the mirror one more time before he left, and snagged the carefully wrapped box sitting on his bed, wrapped in satin.

 

“Gabe get a move on, it’s time to go!” He called out to his older brother, rolling his eyes a little.  _ Probably still fixing his hair.  _

 

“All right, all right Cassie, don’t get your panties in a twist!” Came the slightly snappy response. It seemed they were both slightly on edge.

 

-Drive-

 

They drove in silence for a while, Cas’ fingers white on the steering wheel.

 

Finally. Gabriel spoke. “Come on Cassie, you’re acting like a schoolgirl with a crush. What’s going on?” He rolled his eyes. “This Dean kid probably knows you better than I do at this point.” 

 

_ You have no idea what’s “going on”…  _ Cas thought. He clutched the satin covered box in his pocket, making sure to keep one hand on the wheel. “I’m just nervous. It’s the first time I’ll be meeting his parents, and I want to make a good first impression.” 

 

“Oh, Mary’s tons of fun.” Gabe grinned. “It’s John you have to look out for. Hopefully, he doesn’t glare at me as much since you’ll be there.” He chuckled. “Divert the attention a little bit. You know, share the overprotective fatherly staring contests.”

 

“Gee thanks…” Cas grumbled. “I’m glad to know that my loving older brother will have my back.” 

 

Gabe just shook his head and popped a small chocolate into his mouth, chuckling nervously. Cas turned his eyes back to the road, his fingers easing up on the wheel slightly. 

 

-Dinner-

 

Cas slowly pulled his car in next to the black Impala in the Winchester’s driveway. He smiled softly at the memory it brought back. 

 

_ Cas was sitting nearby Dean, watching him lovingly wipe down his car and explain its care and mechanics to Cas. He had no idea what Dean was saying most of the time, but he loved just being around this man who was so different from him and still seemed to get him so well.  _

 

_ “You see, this is my baby, and you’re my angel.” Dean grinned brightly, the corners of his eyes crinkling adorably as he wiped the sudsy rag across the hood of his car. _

 

_ “Who comes first, the car or me?” Cas replied in a joking tone, scrubbing one of the sides of the car.  _

 

_ “You. Always you.” Dean looked up, dead serious, and Cas felt a flutter in his stomach. This was a more rare show of affection from Dean this early on in their relationship, before they really got to know each other well. He felt himself blush a bit more, looking down at the ground.  _

 

_ “Dean…” Suddenly, a sharp blast of water hit him squarely in the chest. Gasping at the sudden chill, he spit some out and looked up at Dean, who was grinning, holding the hose.  _

 

_ “Oh you’re paying for that one!” Cas grabbed a nearby soapy rag from the grass and threw it at Dean, laughing.  _

 

_ Soon enough they forgot all about washing the car, which was what Dean had really wanted to do that day anyways, but that was ok.  _

 

“Hey lil bro.” Gabe snapped him out of his memory. “You doing ok? The door’s right over there if you can’t find it.”

 

“I’ve been here before Gabriel, but thanks for the help.” Cas rolled his eyes. 

 

The moment he knocked on the door, Dean threw it open and flew into Cas’ arms. “Happy Christmas, Angel.” He whispered. 

 

Cas smiled. “Happy Thanksgiving, Sweetie.” 

 

They stood there a moment before Gabriel cleared his throat, distracting them from each other. “Are we just going to stand out here on the doorstep or what? I’m cold… and where’s my sweetie?” He frowned. “Samsquatch?” 

 

“Sam’s out grabbing something my mom forgot when shopping. We need it for the dessert.” Dean explained. “If it makes you feel better, he fought me for a very long time about being the one to  leave the house.” 

 

Then Dean gestured past himself, into the house, and Cas stepped in, graciously accepting his invitation.

 

“I-i’ll just wait out here for Sam.” Gabe said. “Out here… alone… in the cold… a fortress of solitude…”

 

Dean closed the door firmly, cutting off his dramatics. 

 

“It looks so much better not covered in flour!” Cas joked, referring to Dean’s entryway. 

 

Dean simply chuckled in response, ruffling Cas’ already messy hair. Then, a thought seemed to occur to him. “Hey, um, Cas?” 

 

Cas turned to face him. “Yeah?” He sensed a lot of worry written clear as day on Dean’s face. “What’s wrong? Talk to me.” He sat down on the bottom step of the staircase. 

 

Dean sighed and sat next to him. “Look. My mom is great, I’m sure you’ll love her. I talk about her all the time.” 

 

“You do.” Cas smirked slightly, recalling the cold December night that Dean had first brought up his mom on. 

 

_ The two of them were sitting outside, gazing up at the stars above them, silently cuddling.  _

 

_ The night was black and this made the stars shine that much brighter. It was chilly, but Dean had brought out a huge furry blanket and they were huddled as close as possible together underneath it.  _

 

_ Finally, Dean broke the silence. “You would love Mary. She used to do this with me when I was little. It was her favorite.”  _

 

_ Cas looked over at him and smiled. “Your mother, I take it?”  _

 

_ “Yeah. We don’t see my parents often since they're often busy with work, but she is just the best. I think she’d be thrilled to have you as a son in law.” Dean tried to sound offhand. “You know, in the future.”  _

 

_ Cas’ eyes widened even further in the dark night. This was the first time Dean had brought up marriage, in a way, and his mother. “I think that I would love to meet her.” He smiled at Dean. “She sounds like a great mother.”  _

 

_ “She was.” Dean smiled and began to explain Mary in greater detail. “She made the most wonderful sandwiches and cut the crusts off and everything… She would always sing the lullaby Hey Jude to me as a child… Her marriage wasn’t perfect, but she was always strong…” he rambled on and Cas smiled, slowly intertwining hands with his lovable dork.  _

 

“But I never talk about my father.” Dean continued, unaware that Cas had completely zoned out, immersed in happy memories. 

 

“Yes.” Cas resisted the urge to shake his head to clear it of nonexistent dust bunnies. He looked at Dean, who hesitated. “Dean. You can tell me anything.” He said calmly, taking Dean’s hands in his. 

 

Dean slowly closed his eyes, then opened them again. “I don’t have the best relationship with John."

 

Cas considered this for a moment. “That’s ok, neither do I. I’m sure we can be civil at dinner.” 

 

Dean sighed. “I mean, he wanted me to join the family business. I upset him when…” 

 

“When you said you wanted to be a mechanic.” Cas finished for him. “He wanted you to go into _law_?”

 

Just then, the door opened, and a frosty Gabriel and Sam walked in laughing, Sam’s arm around Gabe’s shoulder. 

 

“Hey Sammy.” Dean grinned, a smile seemingly falling into place over his face, but Cas knew it was fake. And so when Dean stood up, Cas did as well, keeping their hands intertwined. 

 

They walked into the main dining room, and the scent of Christmas dinner hit them suddenly, ham and turkey and potatoes and all sorts of things. 

 

“Wow.” Cas breathed out slowly. Then he blinked. “Are those melted marshmallows on the sweet potatoes?” 

 

“Yeah, Cassie.” Gabe grinned. “Trust me you’ll love it. I even got Samsquatch over here to try it.” He grinned and shoved Sam lightly. 

 

“Whatever you say.” Cas shook his head and smiled. 

 

Just then, a slightly older woman with long blonde hair waltzed into the room, carrying a steaming pile of biscuits and humming Christmas carols.  _ He’s making a list, checking it twice.  _

 

After placing it on the table, she looked up at Cas and a huge grin spread across her face. “You must be Cassie, Dean’s angel!” She exclaimed happily, clasping her manicured nails together. “It’s so great to meet you at last!” 

 

Cas blushed. “I wouldn’t say I’m his angel-“ 

 

“Oh Honey. Anyone who can bring my son back from the brink is as worthy of that title as an actual angel. He simply has not shut up about you since he first met you. So of course, I said, we need to have this boy over so I can meet him at last.” She smiled. 

 

“Hiya Mrs Winchester.” Gabriel gave her a big smile. 

 

“Oh Gabe… you know you can call me Mary.” She smiled. “The same goes for you, Cas. Make yourself at home.” 

 

Sam started going around, gesturing for people’s coats. Cas shrugged his off with a mouthed  _ Thank you. _

 

Cas nodded briefly, and Dean spoke up. “Mom? Where’s John?” 

 

Mary looked up, and a brief flicker of a frown flitted briefly over her face. “John is working a little late tonight sweetie.” 

 

“Of course he is.” Dean scowled, and Cas’ hand tightened around his as he felt him heat up slightly with anger. “On freaking Christmas!” 

 

“Honey…” Mary frowned a little more. “You know he tries.” 

 

“Evidently not hard enough.” Dean rolled his eyes. 

 

“This looks wonderful, Mary.” Cas smiled at her, trying to change the topic. “Did you make this all yourself?” 

 

“Oh, no.” She laughed. “I can only take credit for dinner. Most of the dessert’s credit goes to Gabriel here, he’s such a sweetie. He came over yesterday and handmade all sorts of things.” She shook her head in mock disbelief. “And then of course he left with Sam to go out to some…?” 

 

“I took him to a lovely restaurant.” Gabe smiled. 

 

“Bar.” Sam called out, he was putting all the coats away on a stand in the front hall. 

 

“I-it was a restaurant that doubles as a bar…” Gabe tried to keep his smile.

 

“There was a bartender. It was a bar.” 

 

“We ordered food!” Gabe protested, as Sam walked back into the room.

 

“That food was cheese and nachos.” Sam chuckled and rolled his eyes as he pressed a quick kiss to Gabe’s temple.

 

“I stand by what I said.” Gabe protested, trying not to laugh. 

 

“Whatever, weirdo.” Sam then addressed the group. “I vote we start without Dad.”

 

“Please, sit. I made name tags.” Gabe smirked, it was a smirk that Cas recognized, and he grew immediately nervous.  _ Gabriel what did you do… _

 

Upon glancing at the table, he saw several white cards placed delicately amongst the many fruits, vegetables, and meats. 

 

He picked one up. “Samsquatch.” Next to the elegantly written calligraphy was a tiny doodle of a moose. 

 

Gabe practically smacked the small card out of his hand. “That’s Sam’s, you idiot!” 

 

Cas’ eyes widened. “Yeah… I can read.” He carefully lead a still unhappy Dean around to the other side of the table, where he could already see the other “set” of name tags. Mary and John were at their respective ends. 

 

“Really Gabe?” He groaned as he read his.  _ Baby Cassie, seriously? I’m not three anymore. The angel wings don’t help either.  _ He heard Dean let out a small chuckle as he turned his tag the slightest bit to show him. 

 

“I’m sure yours isn’t much better!” He muttered under his breath as he glanced at Dean’s. He practically choked on his own laughter when he saw what it read- he was indeed correct, Dean’s was not much better.

 

“Ken Doll?” Dean cried out. “Really?” 

 

“I don’t know, It kinda suits you, Dean.” Sam grinned. “What little picture did you get?” 

 

“I got the impala.” Dean grumbled. “At least Sweet Tooth over here didn’t mess that part up. I love my baby.” 

 

Cas chuckled. The sound, however, was interrupted by the slamming of a door, and the stomping of snow off of boots. Then, Dean’s father entered the room. He was tall, dark haired, and intimidating. His glare was indeed, as Gabe had previously stated, terrifying. 

 

“Hello, Mr Winchester, I’m Castiel, but most people call me Cas.” Cas stick out his hand.

 

He stiffened as John looked him up and down, rolled his eyes, and said “You shouldn’t have waited for me to begin eating.” 

 

“John, it’s Christmas…” Mary smiled at him. “Sit down and we’ll start.”

 

John grumbled something under his breath, sitting down on the end of the table closest to Cas. Mary sat at the other end, closer to Dean, and they all sat there for a moment. 

 

Cas looked at Dean’s father’s place tag out of the corner of his eye. _John, just John._ _Smart Gabriel. This is not a man you want to mess with._

 

“Please, dig in.” Mary smiled at them all, and that’s all the prodding along that Gabriel needed, he began healing many different kinds of foods onto his plate, most involving sugar in some form. 

 

“Take some salad.” Sam hissed at him, poking him gently in the ribs. 

 

Dean and Cas simultaneity reached for the turkey, steaming on the table. 

 

“Oh.” Cas whispered, very self conscious since Dean’s parents were there. “Please, you first.” 

 

“No, I insist.” Dean grinned at him, gesturing once more at the turkey. 

 

“It’s your house.” 

 

“Exactly- you’re the guest here.” 

 

“Your mother made the turkey.” 

 

“Your brother helped her.” 

 

“If you two don’t stop bickering now so help me!” John growled. “I’ll take the turkey first.” He grabbed it, starting to pull it away. Dean’s eyes narrowed, and Cas could feel him start to open his mouth, to say something stupid.

 

“Don’t.” He whispered to Dean, putting his arm on Dean’s knee. “It won’t end well. I promise.” 

 

“Rough day at work, Dad?” Sam quickly changed the topic. 

 

“Rougher than most.” John scowled, and began shoveling turkey into his mouth, effectively ending that conversation, and killing the mood completely. 

 

That rather set the tone for the rest of the dinner. As they were finishing up the last of their second and third plates of food, Cas tried one more time to speak with John. “Thank you for allowing us to share Christmas dinner with you and your family.” 

 

John simply scoffed in response. “It wasn’t me who invited you, boy.” 

 

“Ok.” Gabe stood up and clapped his hands together. “Time for me to get dessert. Cassie? Care to help your older brother out?” 

 

Cas just nodded unhappily and stood up to join him, Dean’s hand slipping slowly from his grip, but not without one last squeeze. 

 

-After Dinner and Dessert-

 

“Mr Winchester!” Cas called out as Dean’s father started stomping up the stairs to his room. Slowly, John turned. 

 

“Yes?” 

 

“I know you don’t know me very well, but I was simply wondering if I could as you a question. It’s about Dean.” 

 

John sighed. “I understand.”

 

“You do?” Cas was delighted, he clutched the tiny box in his pocket tighter.

 

“Even though you’re technically bound for life by those tattoos, you want out. I understand. He’s a real drag.” 

 

“Excuse me?” Cas blinked in shock.  _ What.  _ Then anger took over. “No, that’s not what I meant!” 

 

“Oh.” John Winchester cocked his head, as if surprised. “Then what, boy? I’m tired.” 

 

“I know you don’t know me really well, but it’s tradition in my family, when you want to spend the rest of your life with a person, to ask their father for their blessing.” He said quietly. “I do love your son, and I was hoping, just for tradition’s sake, that you would be able to give us your blessing.” 

 

“But why?” John Winchester’s comment shocked Cas. 

 

“Excuse me?” 

 

“Why would you want my son, of all people?” John’s lips pulled back into a sort of grimace. “He doesn’t know anything about anything at all, he wanted to be a mechanic.” John spat out the word as if it was a curse. “He can’t provide for a family, he’s completely useless, and he has yet to prove his worth in any way, shape, or form as a son or even a decent father figure.” He rolled his eyes. “You don’t even know him yet. Trust me, he’ll show his true colors eventually. You don’t want him.” 

 

His voice had raised significantly, and Cas had a sneaking suspicion that Dean was listening outside. 

 

Cas felt his face heat up, and he felt himself involuntarily glaring at the man he had just met.  _ You should leave, before you do anything stupid.  _

 

Instead, he clinched his fists, stood his ground. And spat out as quickly as possible, as much as he could. “Dean Winchester is the most wonderful person I know, which is saying something, since I found out now that he has to deal with you as his father! Dean Winchester is the most loving, caring person I have ever met! He may act all tough on the outside, but I know him and you should be proud of the kind young man your son has grown into! And now I now know why he is so ashamed to have you as a father!” Cas scowled one last time, grabbed his coat, and made to storm out the door before turning back one last time. “And they call me the angel of the two of us, but I’m really the one you should be worried about.” 

 

He slammed the door, and turned around, almost tripping over Dean as he did so. Dean was hunched over, his head in his hands. Suddenly, the consequences of his actions seemed to set in, and he realized what he’d done. 

 

Slowly, he sat down next to Dean. He could already hear deep yelling from inside, and it became apparent just how thin those walls were. 

 

“Dean… I’m sorry.” He spoke slowly at first, but then the words seemed to spill out more and more. “I know you wanted me to get along with your family, and I know I disregarded that just now. I just…” he chose his next words carefully. “I had something of great importance I needed to discuss with your father, and…” he sighed. “There’s no real justifying how I acted.” 

 

It occurred to him that Dean was crying, his shoulders shaking, tears running down his cheeks. He knew this without looking at him, even as he stared straight ahead into the deep blue night. Without thinking about it, he reached out and started absentmindedly tracing the tattoo along Dean’s bicep. It didn’t take Dean long to lean into his shoulder as the deep voice inside was countered with a more shrill one. 

 

Cas sat there with him, staring up at the stars and snow. He knew Dean wasn’t mad at him, that he had been there long enough to hear the important parts of the conversation, and that Dean just needed time, and someone to be with. And so he would wait. He didn’t need to give Dean the little satin wrapped box just then. He would wait as long as he needed, as long as this man was in his life. Little did he know, Dean was thinking the exact same thing as him. 


	5. More Tiny Dates

-Tenth Date-

 

“Hey, Dean.” Cas stood up, trying his hardest not to cast his eyes downward. “I’m really sorry about how things went last night, and I just wanted to apologize. I know I didn’t say much, but I thought you needed space. I didn’t mean to offend your family, or act the way I did, and I know what I said was out of line. I hope you can understand that I will always care about you, and…” he got a little choked up. “I understand if you don’t want me anymore.”

 

Letting out another heavy sigh, he stared up into the eyes that met his. _It felt good to get it all out._ His reflection stared back at him, unblinking, until his eyes watered.

 

“That’s all you have to tell him, Castiel. That’s all you have to tell him,” he whispered to himself. “And then…” he slipped the small box into his pocket, just in case.

 

“Hey, Cassie! It’s for you!” He heard Gabe call up cheerfully. He hadn’t even heard the doorbell ring.

 

“Thanks Gabe!” He called back, closing his eyes one more time, and then put on his smile, and went to greet the man he had invited over.

 

The moment he opened the door, Dean flew into his arms.

 

“Hey, hey, hey what’s wrong?” Cas was instantly concerned. Dean had never greeted him like this over the course of their relationship. Not once. “Come on in.”

 

He closed the door quietly behind him, and held Dean for a second before pulling him back at arm’s length. “What’s going on, Dean? You know you can talk to me.”

 

“Not here.” Dean let out a shaky laugh, and Castiel’s heart sang out for the man in front of him, and all of the pain Dean had clearly been concealing

 

“Ok then, is my room good?” Cas began to help Dean up the stairs, which was completely unnecessary, but he wanted to  make the most out of what might be a few of his last treasured moments with Dean.

 

 _If he doesn’t want to be with you, that will make you worse than an unmarked,_ was the first thought that flew into his head, followed quickly by, _No, that’s your father speaking. Just think of how bad it would be if you lost Dean. In a month, he’s already done more for you than anyone else could, and by the way people talk, I feel like that seems to be the case with him as well._

 

And so he kept his hand tight around Dean’s waist, fumbling on his doorknob as he did so. The moment Cas sat Dean down on his bed, he whirled him around to face him. “Talk.”

 

Dean composed himself slightly before opening his mouth. “I can’t do anything, Cas.” His voice wavered, and Cas could tell he was trying not to get too worked up. “They’re getting a divorce, and there’s nothing I can do.”

 

Cas’ eyes widened, and he began rubbing light circles onto Dean’s back. “Your parents?” He whispered, trying not to overstep his boundaries.

 

Dean nodded slightly. “Last night wasn’t uncommon, it wasn’t irregular. It was the last straw in a large hay bale of events that spiraled out of control pretty quickly. They might have had each other’s names tattooed onto their skin since birth, but,” He let out a sharp laugh. It seemed out of place. “You’d have to look pretty hard to find a more dysfunctional couple.”

 

“Dean, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be the last straw. I never wanted that.” Cas didn’t know what to say. “I-i understand if you don’t want me around. I didn’t want to cause any problems for you at all. Hell, I wanted to fix every single one of them!” _I wanted to marry you…_

 

Dean looked at him as though he had grown a second head. “What? No, god no, I need you to understand, this is not your fault.” He seemed to simply change attitudes in a second, becoming an older brother figure almost instantaneously. “You need to know that what you did back there, with John, that was amazing. Nobody ever, except Sam, has ever done anything like that for me. You don’t need to beat yourself up, so please don’t.”

 

Cas didn’t want that. He didn't want to be comforted. This was about Dean. Tears sprung to his eyes, hot and stinging. _How can a man so broken still never put himself first?_ “Dean…”

 

Dean looked down at him slightly, features twisting into a slight smile. “Yeah, angel?”

 

 _Just tell him you want to marry him. Just tell him. It’s easy! Come on, Even Gabe could do it._ His thoughts, bouncing around his skull, pointed out. “Dean…”

 

“No more talk of this divorce, Angel, just being here with you is all I need.” Dean grinned. “Think fast!” He chucked a navy blue pillow at Cas’ head, and, long story short, Cas did _not_ think fast enough.

 

“Dean!” He repeated his name, his tone now mortified. “These are new!”

 

Dean simply let out a loud cackle, grabbing another pillow. “What, did Daddy Moneybags buy them special?” Cas paused at that. He hadn’t told Dean much about his family, apart from Gabe, but Dean had deduced from Cas’ last name that his father owned several banks and practically slept naked rolling in his money.

 

This stunned Cas momentarily, since he didn’t realize that Dean recognized his last name. “Yes actually. I tore up the other ones.” Cas ducked as Dean’s pillow whistled softly past his ear, and jumped off of the bed into his spacious, and until very recently, empty room.

 

“Why?” Dean jumped back suddenly as he saw Cas’ teal pillow from the corner of his eye. He hadn’t actually expected Cas to return shots.

 

“They disagreed with me.” Cas simply responded, pushing forward to get Dean off the only high ground in the room- his bed. When Dean said nothing, he realized that Dean expected him to explain. “He went to get them without me. They were a hideous shade of beige.”

 

“Ah.” Dean grinned at him, and then, suddenly, flew off of the bed, and landed right on top of Cas. “I thought you liked beige. I would have gotten you a different color coat if I knew…”

 

“Oof!” Cas had the air knocked momentarily out of him. “You oaf!” He laughed, and then tried feebly to fight back. “Ugh. You have conquered me. And I gotta say, it was a _hideous_ color.” He lay there, sprawled out on the floor, gazing up into the eyes of the man above him happily.

 

“You know, I hope you’ll be my date to Sammy’s wedding.” Dean said, completely out of the blue.

 

“It’s Gabe’s wedding too. Of course. It would be my honor.” Gabe and Sam had gotten engaged a few days ago, but they had known each other for a few years, so this wasn’t a surprise. Wedding preparation was beginning soon, and it was all Gabe would talk about now. “Who else would you take?” He asked playfully.

 

Dean opened his mouth to respond, to probably say something sarcastic, and then his phone buzzed. He quickly pulled it out of his pocket, read the message, and then cursed quietly, under his breath. “Shit.” He got up off of Cas, and placed the pillows back into the bed.

 

“What’s wrong?” Cas sat up immediately. “Is it Sam?”

 

Dean nodded, his lips pressed into a thin line. “I’m sorry, I have to go. It’s my parents… the divorce isn’t going well…” He was talking too fast, and while his words showed he needed to go, his eyes begged for an excuse to stay.

 

Cas nodded. “You don’t have to explain. Go.”

 

Dean gave him one last gratefully guilty look and turned away again, practically running through the door.

 

Cas flopped back down onto his bed as he heard his front door open, and then practically slam. The satin wrapped box lay untouched next to him. Groaning softly, he pulled his hands roughly over his own face, amazed at his own stupidity.

 

Gabe walked into the room, engagement ring glinting on his finger. “Was that Dean that left just now? He didn’t stay long.”

 

-Fifteenth Date-

 

 _Hey, come meet me at the pizza place on fifth._ The text on Cas’ phone read. _I need to talk to you._

 

Muttering something about how unfair it was to leave the house “this early” on a weekend, Cas heaved himself out of a pile of ideas for wedding bouquets, patted Gabe on the head gently, turned up the movie in the background, and made to head out the door.

 

“Where are you going…” Gabe slurred, half asleep under his own pile of papers. His, however, were of the financial type.

 

“Have to go meet Dean.” Cas looked over at him.

 

“Cassie you promised…” Gabe whined. “You said today you’d help me pick out stuff for my wedding!” He frowned.

 

“Gabe. I’ll be back. I promise.” Cas sighed. “Shouldn’t you be doing this with Sam anyway?”

 

“He’s busy today.” Gabe said gloomily. “Told me to get a head start on planning.” _Probably with the divorce..._

 

“I’ll be back soon. By the way,” Cas slapped a picture of a certain bouquet onto the table in front of Gabe. “I’ve been staring at the blue ones for an hour. They’re reasonably priced, too.”

 

Gabe scoffed. “We don’t need to worry about money.”

 

Cas smiled. “I’ll be right back. You won’t even miss me. While I’m gone…” he mused over the different piles of paper covering their living room floor, each one haphazardly stacked. “Deal with… that.” He pointed to one at random. “Since you don’t have to deal with finances until you actually know what you’re purchasing.”

 

Gabe leaned over and picked it up. “Dinner plans!” The only sound that answered him was the closing of their front door.

 

Cas sped down the road, eyes sharp and focused. He jerked the steering wheel quickly to the left and practically drifted into the pizzeria parking lot. He was out of the car before the engine stopped.

 

Busting through the doors, he spotted Dean sitting in the corner booth of the small and cozy shop. “Dean! What’s wrong?” He gasped out. “I came as soon as I could!”

 

Dean looked up from the menu, slightly surprised. “You’re early.”

 

Cas sat down, ignoring the dirty looks the couple across the room was giving him for his spectacle.

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

“The divorce.” Dean muttered, leaning in a little. “Not so loud, Cas.”

 

“Sorry.” Cas whispered back. “So the lawyer did something wrong? What happened?”

 

“The lawyer was so resistant! With all of this soulmate tattoo shit, he said he hasn’t seen a case like this is years.” Dean rolled his eyes. “He talked about how she really should reconsider, and that she was being completely unreasonable. They kept explaining to us that the law stated, once you found your soulmate, you were required to stick with them, 'till death do you part and all that bull crap. They won't even let her live in a seperate house! Not that we could afford it.” Dean paused a moment. "He said that he didn't think a case this abstract would ever pass."

 

“It is pretty uncommon.” Castiel agreed. “How’s John taking it?”

 

Dean sighed. “Not well. You’re lucky that your family’s paying for Sammy’s wedding- John’s petitioning for taking everything they share in the bank. Some shit about ‘the woman’ not technically being able to complete a divorce even if possible- that it’s against the law.” He wrinkled his nose, and took a Garlic knot from the small bowl placed in front of them. Castiel hadn’t even seen them arrive. "It's an older law from back when women were considered property, even with the tattoos. They just never felt the need to get rid of it."

 

Nervously, Cas played with the grain of the table, following it with his finger. The deep chestnut color went well with the Christmas decor in the little shop. “Do you think they’ll allow the divorce?” He asked hopefully.

 

Dean sighed. “Even if it doesn’t pass- John wants to control all of their money. And since she brought it up, if it doesn’t pass, life will be living hell for her, not that it wasn't already.”

 

"She'll always be welcome at my place." Cas reached out slowly and took Dean’s hand in his, and feeling the familiar touch on his well calloused hand seemed to calm Dean slightly. “Do you just want an escape, for a little bit?”

 

Dean smiled at him, cupping the back of his hand and tracing the four letters that popped on his wrist. “You are my escape.” He leaned in and kissed him slowly on the lips.

 

Not many touchy feely chick flick moments occurred from that point on, and as Cas got into the car, his cheeks flushed and his wallet significantly lighter, he remembered Gabe. _Crap. Crap crap crap._ It had been three hours and he and Dean had practically cleaned the pizzeria out.

 

The little box still weighed heavily in his pocket as he sped home.

 

“Gabe!” He cried out as he banged opened the door.

 

Gabe was sitting on the floor, packets strewn wildly around him, a glare plain on his face. “I’ll be right back. You won’t even miss me.” He quoted, sarcasm heavy in his voice.

 

Cas felt his ears go red, sometimes a side effect of guilt and embarrassment. “You finished more than just the one pile.” He noted blandly, trying to change the subject.

 

Gabe just shook his head. “I hope whatever Dean had to tell you was worth it.”

 

-Eighteenth Date-

 

Cas had decided he was taking Dean out to dinner. Not to a bar, not to some trashy diner, a real restaurant with real food and real quality. Quickly, he straightened his tie one last time, popped a small mint into his mouth, and headed out the door.  

 

Getting into his purposefully trashy car, (he was _such_ a rebel, not spending his Dad’s money) he hopped onto the road, going at a leisurely pace, not wanting to arrive early. He wanted tonight to be perfect.

 

Looking at the sights around him, the January sun setting, he began to do the first thing anyone in his position would do- worry.

 

 _Relax._ His brain chided. _Dean loves you more than anything else. Don’t worry about the divorce, that can’t possibly ruin tonight too._ The voice in his head had gotten nicer since Dean and he met.

 

Pulling up near their driveway, he got out of the car, walked up to the front door, rang the doorbell, and waited.

 

“Will you get the blasted door, Mary!?” Rang out moments later. There was a slight slur to the words, John had been drinking.

 

This was followed up by a return holler; “I’m busy, you swine! Get it yourself!”

 

“Sam, go get that door right now before I blow a fuse!” John’s voice rang out again, and this statement was followed by a colorful string of adjectives. Cas waited awkwardly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

 

“Sam’s not here!” Mary shrieked, and a door slammed. From the sound of it, it belonged to an oven.

 

“Well then get Dean to do it!” No sooner had John said it then the door was wrenched open, and Dean’s wide eyes greeted Cas’.

 

“Hey Angel.” Dean tried to sound carefree. “Ready for our little night out?”

 

“Come on.” Cas pulled Dean away from the door and closed it firmly. As he started leading Dean to the car, he began his instructions. “Now listen very carefully. I want you to only have a good time tonight. No thinking about the divorce. No stressing whatsoever. I promise you a stress free environment.” He smiled. “Can you do that?”

 

Dean bit his lip, trying to look pained by these instructions. “I don’t know- I’ll try my best.”

 

“That’s the spirit. You’re a real trooper, Dean.” And with that, he unlinked his arm from Dean’s and opened the car door with a flourish. “After you, Your Highness.”

 

Dean chuckled, ducking into the car. Cas walked around and sat in the driver’s seat.

 

“We could have taken my baby, you know. Not your hobo trash car.” Dean joked.

 

“Hey, I love my hobo trash car!” Cas smiled. “It’ll get us there just fine.”

 

“And where exactly is ‘there?’” Dean turned to him, curious. “Where are we going?”

 

“You’ll see.” Cas smiled. “Stress free environment. I promise you you’ll love it.”

 

A few minutes later, they pulled into the parking lot of an expensive, almost club looking place. Dean tilted his head slightly in curiosity. Then, he recognized it.

 

“No.” He whispered softly. “You did _not_ bring me here.” His eyes widened significantly. “Cas, Jesus, I knew you were rich, but… you need to book years ahead of time to even DREAM of coming here.”

 

They were standing behind one of the town’s biggest attraction- The Winter Willow. Dean couldn’t tell at first because they were in some kind of specialty parking lot behind the store itself, almost under it. The balcony above them looked out onto a large, crystal clear lake. Even in January, Cas and Dean could hear several people out there, mingling in their fancy dresses and tuxedos, champagne glasses in their hands.

 

“Come on.” Cas smiled at Dean, slowly using his hand to close Dean’s dropped jaw. “I hope you’re ok with an inside seat. It means we won’t be able to see the waterworks tonight, but there’s always next time. I didn’t want to sacrifice warmth for just that.”

 

“Just that? _Just that?”_ Dean exclaimed. “Cas, that is just the most widely coveted water show in all of America!”

 

Cas’ face fell. “Dean, if you don’t like it, I can always take you back when it’s warmer…”

 

And then Dean whirled Cas around so they were no longer walking side by side and looked him in the eye. “Cas…” He laughed. “Don’t worry, it’s perfect.” He pressed a small kiss to the corner of Cas’ lips, before shaking his head in amusement. “Just that…”

 

Cas smiled back at him. “Come on in. It never ceases to amaze.”

 

The moment they stepped inside, Dean let out a strangled sort of gasp. They were on the very ground floor, where several couples stood together, dancing fluidly as if they had been doing this their whole life. Judging by their sparkly dresses and perfect hair, Dean suspected they had. However, he could see all the way up to the top of the building, seven floors worth of it, since the next floor up circled around the rim of the building, each floor extending out over the middle a little bit more until you could just barely see the stained glass mosaic that was the entire ceiling.

 

“I got us seating in our family’s private booth, if that’s ok.” Cas said to Dean, smirking at his reaction.

 

Dean turned to him. “Private booth?” He let out a little scoff and turned to face the man at the little booth ahead of them. “Lead the way, Moneybags.”

 

They followed the little man up the many stairs, and when they finally reached the highest floor, he lead them to a little booth in the corner of the almost empty floor.

 

“You have a whole floor here?” Dean scoffed, no less amazed.

 

Cas’ mouth twitched at the corner, something resembling a smile. “It's a small floor. Please, sit.” He gestured to the table at the very back of the room.

 

As they sat, an older man with greying hair and a still handsome face walked up to place down their appetizers- a custom made order of several different kinds of bread.

 

“Mr Novak! It is a delight to see you again!” The old man grinned happily. “I haven’t seen you since you were twelve!”

 

“Mr Lance Reilly, this is Dean.” Cas smiled at him. “And you know you can call me Cas.”

 

“Of course, Castiel.” He the turned to Dean. “Is this _your_ Dean?” He exclaimed excitedly, winking at Cas.

 

Cas blushed a brilliant shade of red as Dean responded. “Yes sir. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

 

Lance nodded in response to that, and then turned to Cas. “The usual, I suppose?”

 

“Yes please.” He grinned.

 

Lance turned to go away, and then turned back one last time. “You chose a handsome one, Castiel.” Then he hurried on his way, leaving Dean and Cas alone.

 

“Well that was… you know the waiter by name?” Dean asked him, ripping into the bread.

 

“I’ve known the family that ran this place my whole life.” Cas smiled. “They used to babysit me.”

 

Dean let out a little laugh. “My babysitter was an old alcoholic that my parents didn’t have to pay. His name was Bobby.” He seemed lost in memories. “I used to pretend that Bobby was my real father, and John was just a babysitter.”

 

Cas smiled sadly at him. He opened his mouth to respond, and at that moment, Lance came back, holding high two silver covered plates. “Two of our finest Bourbon Pecan Chicken dishes. Enjoy.”

 

As he left them, Dean cautiously took a bite of his, and his eyes closed in delight. “Oh, this is heaven.” He muttered.

 

From there, conversation flowed quite easily, and Cas found himself laughing more and more, despite the floors below them being near silent, classical music still playing.

 

“You want to dance?” He asked Dean.

 

“We haven’t paid yet.” Dean’s eyebrow rose slowly in his confusion as he pulled out his wallet.

 

Cas waved his hand lazily. “Don’t worry about it. My treat.”

 

“This food was hundreds of dollars!” Dean slowly put his wallet away.

 

“We’ll put it on my father’s paycheck. Relax. It’s fine.” Cas smiled. “Just relax and have a good time.” He glanced down at the ballroom below them. “We don’t have to go down there if you don’t want to.”

 

“I...I don’t know how to dance.” Dean confessed, practically whispering, his ears burning bright red.

 

“That’s ok. Follow my lead.” Cas slid out of his chair and grabbed Dean’s hands. Slowly, he pulled him out to the open floor.

 

“Do I put my hands here?” Dean asked quietly, moving his hands to Cas’ shoulders.

 

“If you’re following me, then yes.” Cas moved his hands slowly to Dean’s waist, and then more to his hips, and began to rock slowly in place. Feeling Dean tense up, he chuckled slightly. “Follow my lead.” He reminded him.

 

Slowly, Dean melted into his embrace, pulling himself closer to Cas as they rocked slowly to the music.

 

“Like this?” Dean whispered after a while, not wanting to destroy the mood.

 

“Exactly like that.” Cas’ eyes twinkled slightly and he looked up at Dean. “Dean…” _Ask him now!_

 

“Yeah, Angel?” Dean smiled down at him.

 

“I need to tell you something.”

 

“Talk to me.”

 

Cas let out a shaky sigh. _Breathe._ The box in his pocket sat untouched, so much heavier than possible. “Dean. I’ve known you for slightly less time than Sam and Gabe have known each other for, but I don’t feel like that should change anything.” He looked up at Dean’s reaction.

 

Dean nodded slowly, not quite sure where this was going. “Ok, Cas, yeah I understand.”

 

“So I was wondering-” His heart was going crazy, struggling to keep up. “If you would-“

 

“Terribly sorry Mr Novak.” A feeble voice snapped him out of his trance. “But it’s for Mr Winchester.” Lance stood behind them, holding out a phone. “You see, there was something about him not responding to his cell, and the woman on the other side sounds to be in quite a hysterical state.”

 

“Shit.” Dean grabbed the phone. “Mom! What is it?” He frantically whisper-shouted.” Listening for a minute, he let out another few colorful adjectives, and said, “I’ll be there in a few minutes, hang on!”

 

Castiel watched in dismay as he rang up, ran and grabbed his phone and coat from the table, and turned back to Cas.

 

“Angel, I’m really sorry.” Dean sounded nervous.

 

“What happened?” Cas asked him, instantly concerned at his tone of voice.

 

“Something with Mom, and the divorce. I didn’t really get the details. I- can you get back to me on what you were saying? I’m really sorry.” Dean clasped his hands together, and Cas could see genuine regret on his face. This was supposed to be his escape.

 

“Go. Now.” Cas whispered to him. “Call me, ok?”

 

Dean’s face fell, almost like he hoped Cas would tell him he couldn’t leave. “Thank you, Cas.” His voice rang out, and he walked up to him, pressing a quick kiss to his forehead, before rushing down the stairs.

 

Cas watched him from the window as he hailed a taxicab and drove away.

 

Slowly, he walked down the stairs, past the couples, and pushed open the big oak double doors. He trudged to his car, put the key in the ignition, and drove home.

 

The moment he reached his room, he flopped onto his bed, and gently removed the small satin wrapped box from his pocket, black velvet cupped inside the palm of his hand, and placed it on his nightstand once more.

 

Sighing, he turned the lights off, and closed his eyes. _Call me…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're five eighths of the way to caught up! Yay! Jack will be coming in during chapter seven, for those wondering


	6. Sabriel Wedding

Cas tightened his golden bow tie (made with real gold of course- his family was so extra) and grumbled something about formalities and strangulation as he gave himself a once over in the mirror. He nodded once, accepting his appearance.

 

Then, turning to Dean, he began involuntarily laughing at the man. Dean was standing there, the most confused expression on his face, as he fumbled with his own sparkling bow tie.

 

Cas practically floated over. “Here. Let me help you with that that.” He straightened Dean’s tie out, being as gentle as possible. He felt Dean swallow, as he carefully pulled the tie tight, but long after that his gaze and hand still lingered near Dean’s chin and neck.

 

“My hero," Dean joked, before noticing his expression. "Don’t worry.” Dean spoke softly, gesturing to all of the blue blossoms surrounding them, and the white benches lining the entirety of the chapel. He sensed Cas’ unhappiness. “They’ll be fine. This whole thing is a dream come true for Sammy.”

 

Dean smiled at him sadly. “I’m not worrying about them.” He leaned forward, cupping Dean’s face with both his hands now, and kissed him softly on the lips.

 

As he pulled away, sooner than he would have liked, he saw a deep blush overtake Dean’s face. “Besides,” Cas commented cheerily, “I planned a bunch of this, how bad can it possibly be?”

 

“Seeing the way you planned our last date, pretty badly.” Dean smirked at him.

 

Low blow.

 

_Cas was standing outside, rain dribbling down slowly all around him. He rolled his eyes and checked his watch. 3:12. He said he’d be here. Cas had been planning this date since he saw the poster for the movie._

 

_Quickly, he’d checked his texts, leaning against a poster on the outside of the movie theater. Shit. Cas’ eyes had widened as he frantically whipped out his phone._

 

_He’d sent a quick text to Dean. ‘I meant three o’clock, not two!’_

 

_“No shit Sherlock.” He’d looked up, and saw Dean walking towards him. “I looked up the movie times when I got here at two and nobody was here.”_

 

_Cas had looked guiltily at Dean. “I…”_

 

_“Don’t worry about it, Angel. Let’s go see this movie you wanted to see so badly you made me get here an hour early.” Dean smirked. “You know the perks to that?”_

 

_“What?” Cas’ blush was spreading from his cheeks to the rest of his face as he noted Dean’s hair, slickened and flattened by his time standing outside in the rain._

 

_“I got us front row seats.” Dean had said with a smirk on his face._

 

_Cas had flushed once again. “I don’t deserve you.” He’d pulled Dean close to him, and cupped his face while he tried to give him the kind of kiss a boy like Dean deserved._

 

_“Wow.” Dean had panted when they finally pulled apart. “Guess I can check that one off my bucket list.”_

 

_Cas had simply chuckled, feeling a little less guilty._

 

“Ha ha very funny.” Cas wrinkled his nose at the memory. He checked his hair one last time nervously in the mirror, before turning to Dean one last time. “Ready?” He smiled at him, picking up his bouquet of flowers.

 

Dean took his arm, and began heading out so they could take their place in the line of processors. “Don’t cry.” He whispered to him.

 

“I doubt I’ll be the one crying by the end of Sammy’s wedding vows,” He whispered back as they stepped in line in front of Charlie, who was invited here to support Gabe as well. He winked at her before facing front with Dean. She put one hand on his shoulder briefly. 

 

Gabe stood in the very front of the line, and Cas could hear his older brother’s nervous breathing from here.

 

“Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” He whispered to Gabe quietly, and then the music started.

 

Being the maid of honor was lovely for Cas, since he was dressed in a white tuxedo, and was followed by Charlie, Luci, and Rick. Looking over, the three people standing by Dean were two men and a woman he didn’t know, all of which were dressed in black.

 

Cas was indeed correct. By the time they were in place and Sam and Gabe were reciting their vows, he could see tears slowly trickling down Dean’s cheeks.

 

Sam’s dark black suit looked expensive, and he could tell that Sam felt uncomfortable in it, but Cas could also see happy tears in his eyes as he pledged himself to Gabe, _even if death do them part._

 

“Sammy, will you do me the honor of becoming my one and only Moose?” Gabe spoke out, grinning slyly at his altered wedding speech. “My tall place when I am low? My personal tree house to climb whenever-”

 

“I will.” Sam had spoken hurriedly, cutting Gabe off, but his eyes held nothing but love. “Will you do me the honor of becoming my sugar angel? My eccentric little baker? My optimism when I can’t be?”

 

“I will.” Now Gabe had tears in his eyes as well.

 

“You may kiss the moose!” Bobby, the old man Dean had spoken so highly of, smirked. “Ya idjits.”

 

Sam leaned in and kissed Gabe fully on the lips, and swung him into his arms, carrying him down the aisle easily, Gabe’s white suit a stark contrast to Sam’s. The cheers were instantaneous, and very loud. Charlie had both of her hands cupped around her mouth as she cheered, and Cas was donning the biggest smile Dean had ever seen on his face.

 

Cas and Dean were the first two to proceed down the aisle behind them, linking arms.

 

The moment they stepped into the expensive room next to the pavilion, they unlinked their arms, grabbing each other’s hands instead, and practically ran to their brothers, who were standing together in the corner, surrounded by Gabe’s family.

 

The moment Gabe saw them, he broke free from the grasp of Luci, his older sister, and her boyfriend Michael, and fought his way over to them.

 

“Hey there Cassie!” He exclaimed happily. “I’m married! Married!” Gabe wiggled the ring on his finger for good measure.

 

“Yeah.” Cas chuckled.

 

“You’re next, you know that, right?” Gabe smirked at him, sipping champagne in one hand, Sam’s wrist held firmly in the other. “Just don’t steal my thunder and propose here and now.” He joked.

 

Dean’s eyes widened slightly.

 

“Of course we wouldn’t.” Cas rolled his eyes. “Where are we sitting to eat?”

 

“Always worrying about the food, aren’t you?” He chuckled. “You’re at the family table with Dean, Luci, Michael, Anna, and Dad. You’ll have the best view of Sam and I, and our ginormous wedding cake.” He grinned.

 

“Did you make this one yourself?”

 

“Anna had me step away from the cake this time…” Gabe frowned slightly. “Said something about me not being able to see the cake until today.”

 

Dean chuckled. “I’m sure that killed you inside.” Seeing Gabe’s face begin to pale, he looked nervously at Cas. His face was the same shade. “Was it something I said?”

 

There was a slight muttering around them, and you could hear heavy boots, and then someone shoved past Dean to get to Gabe.

 

Gabe looked down at the ground, which was uncharacteristic for him. “Chuck.” He nodded quietly.

 

“Oh don’t give me that, it’s your wedding day!” Chuck, their father, exclaimed. “I feel this family feud has gone on long enough.” He clapped a hand onto Gabe’s shoulder, almost hesitantly.

 

Gabe’s eyes swelled up with tears, and he flew into his Dad’s arms.

 

Their dad chuckled and hugged him back, turning to Sam. “You’re a very lucky man, Samuel.” He put his hand out.

 

Sam shook it, and smiled.

 

Dean and Cas were watching this, and Dean could feel Cas shaking with slight anger beside him.  

 

Then, they heard a bell ring once, twice. “Lunch.” Gabe explained happily, and he dragged Sammy off so they could make their big and flashy entrance, while the their guests filtered through the stained glass doors.

 

When Dean and Cas stepped inside, conscious of Chuck directly behind them, they felt the light, filtered through the stained glass, hit their skin in a rainbow of colors.

 

It was a big room, with wooden walls and huge stained glass windows, and several large wooden tables covered by baby blue lace cloths. They were set, and expensive wine centered every table.

 

“Damn. You have a huge family.” Dean whispered to Cas.

 

“Gabe only invited the ones he got along with the best…” Cas whispered back to him. “Our family is huge.”

 

“Wow.” Was the last thing Dean said before he sat down, and Gabe and Sam stood up to make some announcement, their hands still firmly clasped.

 

“We’d like to thank you all for attending.” Gabe started out, wincing a bit as the microphone squeaked. “We appreciate whatever effort it took for you to plan this, coach us through this, or even just show up..” He chuckled, and stepped back slightly to let Sammy take over.

 

“This day could not have been more amazing for us, and we would like to thank you all individually at a later time.” Sam smiled. “But for now, I believe my husband and I are going to enjoy our first dance as officially married.”

 

And with that, Sam lead Gabe out onto the dance floor. Beauty and the Beast’s “Tale as Old as Time” began to play, and you could hear a few whoops and cheers from random members in the audience.

 

“I’m obviously Beauty, so who does that leave to be the beast?” Gabe joked loudly, and Sam silenced him with a smirk and a quick twirl.

 

Charlie snuck up next to Cas, grabbing his arm. He put his hand on her head slowly, just like he used to.  

 

When the song ended, the clapping was nera deafening. Finally, it quieted enough for Gabe to get a word in. “Who’s ready to get this party started?” He yelled.

 

As soon as PATD’s Girls/Girls/Boys came on, Charlie dragged Cas and Dean out onto the dance floor right next to Gabe and Sam, twirling him there and then.

 

The dancing seemed to go on for days, but it lasted only a few short hours. Eventually, however, the guests started to dissipate, until only the direct family and Bobby remained. Charlie even left with a quick peck to Cas' cheek and a promise to stay in touch. She left hand in hand with a brunette girl, and Cas smiled. It seemed that they had both grown up.

 

The last part of the wedding was less of a party, and more of Gabe and Sam taking that bunch of friends and family drinking at night. They rented the bar. The whole bar.

 

Bobby began knocking back shots with his husband, Crowley, right away, and many onlookers crowded around their drinking competition, Luci and Michael among them, so close together that they could be one person.

 

It became apparent quite quickly that Cas was a lightweight.

 

“Y-kno Dean?” He smirked at Dean, his speech slightly slurred as he raised his glass to his lips one last time. “I would’ve asked you.”

 

“Okay then Angel.” Dean let out a nervous laugh, standing up. “You’re clearly drunk. Let’s get you home.” He looked at the three shot glasses in front of the man next to him, and shook his head slightly. _What did they put in those?_

 

“No… don’t go.” Cas muttered. “Come on.”

 

“You are clearly drunk.” Dean rolled his eyes slightly. “Come on, Sunshine, it’s only seven.”

 

“Deeeeaaannnnn.” Cas pouted, looking up at Dean with those big puppy eyes of his. “Are you single?”

 

Dean blinked at him, once, twice. “Um…”

 

“Cause if you are, I’d love to ask you out.” Cas tried to put another shot to his lips, but Dean leaped forward, practically straddling the table to prevent this.

 

“Uh, Cas. You really shouldn’t do that.”

 

Cas looked up at him again. “So? What is it?” His speech was slurring more and more. “Are you? Hot single?” He muttered.

 

“Cas, I’m dating someone…” Dean started, trying to jog Cas’ memory. He gasped when he saw his angel’s eyes fill with tears.

 

“But I was gonna ask you out!” Cas wailed, a year dripping down his cheek, quickly followed by another. “Dean, I love you!”

 

“Shh Cas please!” Dean looked around the bar, seeing Gabe stand up and start coming over. “It’s ok, I’ll go out with you!”

 

Cas stopped crying immediately. “You will?” There was such hope in his eyes, and Dean made a mental note never to go drinking with Cas ever again.

 

“My god.” The sudden, deeper voice above Dean made him jump about a foot into the air. Whipping around, he locked eyes with Gabe. “Little Cassie’s even worse than I remember.” He chuckled, shaking his head slowly. “He’s never living this down as far as I’m concerned.”

 

Dean shot a glare in Gabe’s direction as Cas babbled happily behind him. “Didya hear him Gabe?” Cas let out a happy sigh, “He said he’d go out with me.”

 

“Yeah it’s really great, Cassie. Congrats.” Gabe monotoned. “Don’t let him stay too long.” This was addressing Dean, who let out a small nod and a smile.

 

Eventually, it became clear that Gabe had had enough of Cas’ drunken state, and he left Sam’s side for the second time that night to approach Cas.

 

“All right Cassie, that’s enough, Now let’s get you home…”

 

“Nooooo.” Cas sluggishly blinked at him. “Fight me.”

 

“Yeah buddy you’re real terrifying.” Gabe rolled his eyes and hoisted Cas into his arms, making for the door.

 

“Hold up, Gabe, this is your wedding party!” Dean scrambles up out of his chair, knocking back one last shot as he did.

 

“The kid takes priority, Sorry Dean-o.” Gabe chuckled.

 

“I’ll take him, just go have fun.” Dean blurted out. It took some convincing, but he got Gabe to shovel Cas off into his waiting arms. “Come on buddy, let’s get you home,” he chuckled.

 

-The Next Day-

 

Cas awoke slowly, blinking sluggishly at the sunlight. His forehead was pounding, his mouth was dry, and there was an actual angel beside him, rimmed in pure light. “D-Dean?” He got out, licking his lips as the blurry face came into focus.

 

The light was hurting his eyes, so he tried to sit up behind Dean, who was blocking some of the light. Immediately, he let out a groan as his head thunked back onto the pillow.

 

“Hey Cas.” Dean chuckled, moving to block more of the light. “You remember much from last night?” He asked, passing Cas a glass of water.

 

Cas graciously accepted the water, chugging a little before looking back at Dean, his blue eyes full of regret. “Did I, did I ask you out?” He wondered aloud, scrunching up his nose as he tried to remember.

 

Dean laughed out loud, trying hard to stuff down the fits of giggles, eventually quieting himself when Cas looked at him reproachfully. “Man, that was hilarious, but it was not the worst thing you did that night.”

 

Cas groaned softly, the sound melodious to Dean’s ears. “What did I do?”

 

“Well for starters, when I told you I wasn’t single, you cried until I said I would go out with you.” Dean smirked, tapping Cas’ forearm. “It’s almost like you forgot you have my name tattooed onto your skin.”

 

Cas buried his head in his pillow. Dean knew him well enough by now that he knew his angel was only doing that to hide the blush.

 

“And then…” Dean tapped the corner of his mouth, almost as if he was struggling to remember. “And then you asked to fight Gabe when he tried to take you home.”

 

“Oh god.” Cas muttered under his breath.

 

“And once I finally got you home, you started telling me about this cat that you had when you were little. You named him Misha, and he had ‘big blue eyes’ and ‘silky black hair’ just like you.” Dean smirked.

 

Cas’ groaning got louder.

 

“It’s ok, I thought the story was kind of cute.” Dean smirked. “It was after that that things got really interesting.”

 

Cas looked up at him then, finally taking his face out of the pillow, though he still looked quite mortified. “What did I say?”

 

“Well, it’s less what you said, and more what you did. I left you on the couch in the living room to go get you a glass of water and a wet rag to put over your eyes, but when I got back, lo and behold, no Castiel.” Dean chuckled at the memory. “I wandered the house trying to find you, cause I knew you couldn’t have gotten far, and luckily I found you. In the kitchen. Putting flowers in your blender.”

 

“Excuse me?” Cas asked him, confused. He thought he had heard him wrong.

 

“Well… I’m pretty sure you said something about having to make friendship cookies for me, but you weren’t making a lot of sense, so it could have honestly been anything.” Dean cocked his head as Cas took a sip of his water, trying to process this.

 

“Did you save the flowers?” Cas finally asked, after a long period of silence.

 

“Save the flowers?” Dean laughed grimly. “I barely saved your hand, Cas! You turned the mixer on without taking your hand out first.”

 

“So I’m guessing that’s a no.” Cas let out a small chuckle, and Dean was soon to follow.

 

“Yeah, who knew you were such a lightweight, Angel?” Dean joked.

 

‘No one except Gabe, until last night, I suppose.” Cas rolled his eyes. Oh well. Couldn’t keep it a secret for forever.”

 

Cas twiddled his thumbs anxiously. “So I suppose I only ruined your night then.”

 

Dean’s eyes widened. “Cas, what? No!.” Seeing Cas’ downcast look, he grabbed Cas’ hands and looked him straight in the eyes. “Taking care of you was probably the best way I could have spent my night.”

 

Cas still looked uncertain, so Dean decided to throw in a little humor, “Plus, without me, who would have been there to save your hand from that big nasty blender?”

 

“Who’s the reason I was even near that big nasty blender in the first place?” the beginnings of a smile made their way onto Cas’ face.

 

“Hey! Cheap shot.” Dean growled, not really angry. “Who in their right mind thinks flowers are the appropriate cookie ingredients?”

 

“I mean, there is flour in cookies,” Cas pointed out, not unreasonably. “And I wasn’t in my right mind, Dean. That was the point of it all. I was intoxicate-”

 

He was cut off by Dean smashing his lips into him. “Good to know you’re back to normal buddy.” Dean grinned as he hugged Cas. “I love you.”

 

“Love you too Dean. Won’t ever stop.” Cas’ sleepy mumble could barely be heard, smothered in Dean’s ACDC shirt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jack comes in next chapter! :D


	7. Month of May

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We get my first writing of Jack now, yay! Also, chapter nine will wrap up some plot holes and/or questions you may be thinking of.

-Middle of May-

 

Cas stumbled through the undergrowth, following Dean, as he had been for an hour by now. “Where are we?” He gasped out as he stumbled over a tree root. He kept his hand firmly in Dean’s, even as Dean pulled him a little faster.

 

It was hot, it was humid, and Cas was pretty sure that at least one of the many bugs and spiders that had bitten him was poisonous. Also he hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast, and his stomach had been growling obnoxiously this entire trip. 

 

“We’re almost there!” Was Dean’s only response, called back at him right before he ducked through one final tangle of vines and leaves, pulling Cas into a large clearing. 

 

Cas’s eyes went wide at this. “Woah.” 

 

“Thought I should finally get you out here alone, with all the stress and stuff that’s been going on lately. It’s just you and me.” Dean grinned as he watched Cas take in the view. “Since I haven’t been completely here lately, I even turned off my phone. No distractions!” He promised.

 

Cas nodded silently as he turned around and around, taking all of it in, looking at the green foliage and purple flowers that adorned everything in sight. There was a small brook running through the center of the clearing, and the water gurgled happily as the little stream passed them by. A soft light seemed to fill the air, dousing everything with golden light. It was beautiful. 

 

Cas looked to Dean then, the same golden light was highlighting his jawline and making his emerald green eyes pop and sparkle. He couldn’t believe that this beautiful man loved someone like him. He couldn’t believe someone would put this much effort into doing something like this for him. It had been months, and he still couldn’t believe his relationship with Dean. 

 

Speaking of Dean, he had worn a tank top today, and that allowed Cas to see his own name written out on Dean’s shoulder, which sent a certain sense of pride through him. 

 

“Come over here.” And then Dean was taking his hand again and leading him next to the little brook and they were sitting down on some kind of blanket, stereotypically checkered. 

 

There was a basket on that blanket, and as they sat down, Dean watched Cas eye up the basket. “This was premeditated.” He chuckled. “ _ God  _ I love you.” 

 

“I brought your favorite food…” Dean singsonged. 

 

Cas let out a little gasp and his eyes widened. “You don’t mean..?” 

 

And from the little wooden picnic basket, Dean sleekly pulled out and revealed, with a lovely aroma that set Cas’ mouth watering, two bags of White Castle drive thru. 

 

Cas grabbed the bag that Dean handed to him gladly, and pulled out a jumbo burger. He bit into it gladly, his eyes closing as he savored the flavor. “My hero.” 

 

Dean was biting back laughter, deciding to instead bite into his own burger, watching his angel. His hand ghosted lightly over his jacket, before he reached into the woven basket again and pulled out two beers, passing one to Cas. “Worth all that hiking we did to make it here?” He asked him, already knowing the answer.

 

“Completely. If I knew my evening would turn out like this, I wouldn’t have complained so much.” Cas joked, only slightly serious. 

 

“Oh please. You never complain. That’s what makes you so wonderful.” Dean rolled his eyes. “Trust me, your angelic cover wasn’t permanently marred by one little ‘are we there yet?’.”

 

Cas let out another chuckle, staring deeper into Dean’s eyes. He was beginning to count his freckles when Dean began to speak again.

 

“Have you ever thought of marriage?” The question started Castiel, and he jumped.

 

“What?” 

 

Dean repeated himself. “Have you ever thought of marriage?” As he asked, he traced the name on Cas’ forearm, the winding curves of the four cursive letters. 

 

Cas felt his breath hitch. “Occasionally.” He tried and failed to sound nonchalant, the ring in his pocket growing heavier. He still carried it everywhere he went, despite him having no idea when he was going to give it to Dean. 

 

Dean narrowed his eyes playfully. “You do think of me in the aisle with you, right?” 

 

Cas grinned. “No, I think of me, walking down the aisle, to meet my beautiful husband the White Castle burger and lovingly embrace him. We’ll say our vows, and I’ll do my best not to eat him, until…” Cas melodramatically clasped one hand over his heart, “Alas, it was not meant to be, and I will devour him in his sleep.” 

 

Dean shoved Cas playfully, belting out laughter. “You son of a bitch! You’ll dump me for a White Castle burger? Now I know where I really stand.” Dean stuck out his tongue childishly, joking, and Cas began to chuckle. 

 

“I’ll always choose you over burgers, Dean.” Cas looked into Dean’s eyes, the later of the two looking away and blushing before blowing a playful rasberry in his direction. 

 

“Have you?” the words seemed to escape Cas’ mouth before he could do anything about them as he looked up at Dean and winced mentally. Of course Dean had thought of marriage

 

“Of course. I imagined many things about my marriage, but there’s always one thing in common, no matter when I think of it.” Dean said, looking into Cas’ eyes. 

 

“Oh?” Was there a certain type of flower Dean particularly liked? Maybe it was a chocolate fountain. Dean loved chocolate fountains. 

 

Dean leaned in and Caught Cas’ lips in his own. “You.” 

 

Cas looked at Dean. He was just a beautiful human being, and Cas didn’t deserve this man in his life. 

 

They sat there later into the night, until the fireflies began to come out. Cas’ eyes lit up. Dean chuckled slightly. “Do you want to catch fireflies, Cas?” Cas turned to face him, his eyes shining and glistening with childish glee. 

 

Dean grabbed him by the arm and pulled him up. “Come on, I’ll race you. Whoever can get ten in his hand first wins.” 

 

“You’re on!” Cas went to work, bounding after the tiny glowing bugs so happily and carefree that Dean just stared and looked at him for a while. He was beautiful. The way he acted, the tiny little things he did, all of it was just making Dean fall further head over heels for this man. It was dangerous, and it was intoxicating. Dean had never known he could love someone so much.

 

“I’ve got three already, Dean!” Cas’ voice, tinged with pride, cut through his thoughts. Damn, he was good at this. 

 

With a quickly muttered “Son of a bitch!” Dean began catching fireflies as quickly as he could, which actually proved to be much harder than he remembered. He and Sammy hadn’t done this in years. 

 

“I’m at four!” He finally called across the clearing to Cas.

 

“Six!” The response was immediate. 

 

There was a long pause, punctuated by Dean scrambling about. “I’m up to seven now!” 

 

“Nine.” Cas grinned, looking up from his work and across the clearing at Dean, who let out another quick profanity at this. “And… ten.” Cas stood up.

 

“How are you so good at this?” He cried out. He slowly began making his way over to Cas in defeat. 

 

“This was my favorite thing to do as a kid, next to catching the bumblebees.” Cas explained as he released his fireflies, sending them spiraling off into the night, blinking. 

 

“Y-you caught bees?” Dean wasn’t sure that he’d heard him correctly. 

 

Cas just looked at him strangely. “Of  course. You did not?” 

 

It took Dean a solid twenty seconds before he spotted the small smirk on Cas’ face, just barely tugging at the corner of his lips. 

 

“I love you, you dork.” Dean captured his lips in a kiss. With the fireflies blinking all around them and nobody but the two of them there, they stood together, gazing at each other.

 

~•~•~•~•

 

-Later in May-

 

Cas’ phone was ringing. 

 

“Cassie, you gonna get that, or what?” Gabe looked at him in confusion, setting down his cards. 

 

“What?” Cas jumped a little, Gabe’s voice startling him. “Oh, yeah. Sorry.” He looked down at his phone and saw Dean’s caller ID, one of him sticking out his tongue. Grinning, he made to stand up. “I’ll just take this, if that’s ok?”

 

“Oh yeah, no problem Cassie. I’m only your brother, here to visit you when I could be spending quality time with my Moose. It’s not like I turned down other plans or moved mountains to be here with you. Don’t worry. Please, by all means, answer that phone.” 

 

Cas shot him a long look before accepting the call. “Hey Babe, what’s going on?” He asked. He could hear Gabe snickering behind him.

 

“Cas. Can I come over? I don’t want to be a burden, but-” 

 

“Of course, Dean. You don’t have to ask anymore, you should know that.” Cas chuckled. 

 

“Oh, that’s a relief. I’m kind of… outside your door.” Dean chuckled slightly over the phone, but it came out more forced than Cas knew it should have. 

 

“I’ll be right there.” Cas raced down the stairs, wrenching open the door to see Dean shuffling awkwardly there, phone still to his ear. 

 

“Hey.” Dean said softly. 

 

“What’s wrong, Dean?” Cas looked him over nervously. 

 

“I don’t think Mom is going to get the divorce to work.” Dean sighed heavily as Cas let him in. “John’s lawyer swung everything so that even if she can get a divorce, he’ll take eighty percent of all of her assets and general wealth, as well as the house.” Dean’s face fell. “It’s not possible to live off of twenty percent of what she has now, it’s just not possible, Cas.” 

 

“Oh, Dean.” Cas frowned, unhappy to see Dean this upset. “Come on,” he lead Dean to the kitchen, where he began to prepare tea for him as well as Dean’s coffee, with a splash of cream and half a spoon of sugar, just the way he liked it. 

 

“Sammy’s over there now, trying to work something out. I assume that Gabe came here?” Dean accepted his coffee with a quiet “Thanks,” and took a slow sip.

 

“Hey Dean-o.” Gabe appeared in the doorway, but the way he said Dean’s name this time wasn’t happy and cheerful. He sounded mournful, and the soft way he said it made Cas’ heart ache painfully.

 

“Gabe.” Dean raised his coffee mug to him, and Gabe moved to sit next to him. 

 

Dean took another sip of his coffee and winced. “Cas, Angel, you got anything stronger here?” 

 

“Dean, no.” Cas frowned slightly. 

 

Dean sighed. “I just hope everything turns out ok…”

 

“Dean, I’m sure everything will be fine.” Cas sat himself down on Dean’s lap, straddling his waist and looking him right in the eyes. 

 

“Cas…” Dean looked at him as well, his hands sliding their way to his waist.

 

“Aaanddd… this is my cue to leave the house. Have fun guys.” Gabe winked at Cas again, who rolled his eyes and stuck out his tongue at him. 

 

Cas turned back to Dean, and he kissed him softly. “Everything will be ok.”

 

~•~•~•~•

 

-June First-

 

They were having a pool party of sorts, with a big hole in the ground filled with chlorine water and giant inflatable rings and those martinis with the little umbrellas. It was Gabe’s idea, since everyone had seemed upset about something lately, or at least uptight. Everyone was enjoying the rare eighty something degree day, and splashing around together. 

 

“Catch me, my moose!” Gabe took a running leap at Sam and took him down flailing into the water, as Gabe ran into him with all of his considerable weight. 

 

They both came up spluttering and laughing, causing Dean and Cas to chuckle fiercely. “How on God’s green earth was I supposed to catch you?” Sam said jokingly. 

 

“With your big sasquatch muscles, of course!” Gabe patted Sam’s arm reassuringly. “I believe in you. Maybe next time.” 

 

Sam just shook his head. “Why am I married to you?” He chuckled before capturing Gabe’s lips in a kiss. 

 

“Eww, gross! Kissing in public Sammy, I thought you were above that!” Dean took a sip from his martini and giggled. Sam just stuck his tongue out at his brother. 

 

“You all are such idjits.” A gruff voice came from the side of the pool, and they turned to see Bobby and Crowley standing there, smiling. 

 

“You made it!” Sam grinned, beginning to wade out of the pool to meet them, despite the barnicle clinging to him that was Gabriel. “Bobby, long time no see!” 

 

“And how are my newlyweds?” Bobby smiled while Crowley began to make himself a martini. “Haven’t seen you since you were in the aisle.”

  
  
“We’ve been like peas in a pod. Samshine here just can’t get enough of me.” Gabe proclaimed boldly, making kissy lips at his husband. 

 

Sam just rolled his eyes and pushed him further under the water, finally getting out. “Can I get an alcoholic beverage over here?”

 

~•~•~•~•

 

-In a broken down house, five years ago-

 

The windows were all broken or boarded up. The lawn had never been tamed, and weeds grew through the sidewalk and everywhere else. The attic had long since been overtaken by spiders, and though there were several rat traps scattered around both inside and out, not a single of the rats infesting the house had been caught to this date. The air conditioning consisted of a loud and poorly operating fan in one corner of the living room, and the ratty couch was occupied completely by one very drunk man. A woman was in the next room over, with her short hair tied back into a small ponytail, trying her hardest to stitch up part of an old pair of jeans. The uneven legs on her chair rocked every time she reached across the table for something. A breeze whisked through the house, but there was an uneasy silence about everything while the man waited, not very patiently, and even the rats seemed to be holding their breath.

 

Then there was the sound of shattering glass, and a small child’s scream.

 

“Where is that boy?” A loud and furious voice was next to brake the cautious silence in the household. “Kelly, where is your fucking kid?” 

 

The man waited a moment longer before shouting again. “Kid, if you don’t get your ass down here in three seconds, I’m going to-”

 

The woman with short brown hair turned, and stormed up to the man, bags prominent under her eyes. “Just because you’re not his father,  _ Lucifer,  _ doesn’t mean you can keep treating him this way! Jack’s a person, just like you and me, he’s not your personal slave!” She snarled, and by his eye roll and immediate response, it was obvious that this was not the first time they had had this argument.   
  
“He’s an unmarked, Kelly! Those people never turn out well, you know why? Every single unmarked in history has gone on to royally fuck up society in some big way! This kid’s going to be a school shooter, or a mass murderer, or spend his life behind bars! They’re evil!” 

 

“What, like you?” She shot back, her tone biting. “Just because I took you in after Jefferson died doesn’t mean you can come strolling in here and treat my son like crap! You’re no better than him, Mr ‘I Don’t Need A Soulmate!’”

 

Lucifer ground his teeth unhappily, his fists clenched as he looked down on the shorter woman. “This is not the topic at hand!”

 

“Oh, and what is? That he broke your lousy beer bottle? So what?”

 

“The kid’s bad news, Kelly!” 

 

“He’s ten, Lucifer, ten! Breaking one stupid bottle isn’t some sign of him being the Oncoming Storm! For the love of god!” Kelly’s fists were clenched, but there was fear in her eyes. 

 

There was a harsh sound, the sound of skin on skin, and Kelly let out a harsh cry as she fell back. Lucifer growled down at her. “Now look what you made me do.” He mockingly called down at her as she struggled to sit up.

 

“I want you out of my house,” Kelly’s voice wavered, but she stood her ground. “by tomorrow morning.”

 

“Oh please, you always say that when I’m drunk.” Lucifer rolled his eyes and turned away from her near sobbing form as she scampered away, presumably to find Jack and get out of here. “Kid! Where are you? Get me another bottle now and I won’t be too mad at you!” 

 

There was a slight scampering noise, a few whimpers, and then Jack came into view, his whole form shaking, his hair disheveled, and his clothes covered in dust bunnies from wherever he was hiding. Carefully, his tiny fingers handed Lucifer his beer, his eyes teary. He made to scamper away, but Lucifer grabbed him by his raggedy shirt.

 

“There you are, you little shit.” Lucifer growled at him once more. “How’s your neck? Have they stopped asking you questions about it in school?” 

 

Jack slowly reached around his fingers and pulled down his shirt, where fading purple marks encircled his entire throat. He shook his head, and more tears began to spill over the edge of his eyes. 

 

“Well then, this time I’ll just have to hit you somewhere they won’t see, ok Jack?” Lucifer grinned sadistically, raising an open palm threateningly. 

 

Jack flinched, not saying a word.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: Violence and abuse. I’m only being terrible to Jack for this chapter and maybe one more, I promise. If you can’t stomach it, that’s ok, that’s what the fluff is for.   
> Also, since last chapter was a flashback for Jack, he's about 16 now.

~•~•~•~•

 

The moment the beginning rays of sun stretched through the cracks in the boarded up windows, Jack’s eyes snapped open. Moving with a hasty kind of speed, he slid off the bed, stepping lightly over the creaking floorboards. The house was empty, and the stillness was eerie. 

 

He stepped into the kitchen, crouching to open the small and mostly empty cupboard. Pulling out a beat up box of pancake mix, he dragged a chair over and plopped the mix onto the counter. He flipped open the squashed lid one last time, ignoring the slight puff of pancake mix, pouring it into a bowl sitting out. He slid off of the chair to get the other ingredients, and sat back onto the chair to add them, mixing well. 

 

There was a slight creak as a breeze whistled through the house, and Jack’s head shot up as he glanced around nervously. When nothing happened, he went back to his work. Finally, he  turned on the stove and placed the large flat skillet, wincing slightly as the jagged edge of the metal raked across the stove, making a horrible noise. Jack cut off a square of butter and greased the pan. 

 

He moved on to pour the pancake mix onto the skillet, watching as they bubbled slightly as they cooked. He waited until it was possible, and then he flipped them over, allowing their slightly golden brown surfaces to rise. However, as he went to reach over the hot skillet, his forearm came in contact with the very edge for a moment too long, and he pulled back with a hiss of pain, tears coming to his eyes immediately.  Quickly, he shrugged it off, turning back to the pancakes and trying to get all of them onto the plate before any of them burned. 

 

The delicious aroma of the cooking breakfast filled his nose, but he resisted from tasting any just yet. He took a minute to put a bandaid on his burn, not knowing what else to do. The fridge didn’t really keep things cool enough to make ice. Then, he began the process again, until no pancake mix was left. He moved three of them onto a plate, and got out a glass. 

 

By now, his stomach was rumbling, but he ignored it and continued to complete making breakfast. He carefully poured the last of the orange juice into the cup. It only filled it about halfway, so  he went to the sink and turned on the water, making sure to wait a few seconds before the water turned clear, and filled the rest of the glass with that. Finally, he sat down in the seat across from the pancakes, gave them one last saddened glance, and waited. 

 

Almost on cue, Lucifer burst through the door, almost taking it off of its hinges. “You’d better have my breakfast, you little shit!” He yelled, and stormed into the kitchen, where Jack sat patiently, his head down, trying his hardest not to flinch. Lucifer’s breath smelled of alcohol, as it usually did when he came home at this time.

 

“Smells fine…” Lucifer prodded at the pancakes, and when he found the ones on his plate satisfactory, turned to Jack. “Where’s the syrup, kid?” He asked him in a dangerously calm tone. 

 

Jack took a moment to respond. “We don’t have any syrup, Fathe- Sir.” He had caught himself just in time. He winced a little more, preparing himself for a blow to the top of the head, or maybe to the neck again.    
  
Lucifer frowned at the young boy in front of him. “Huh.” He went back to eating his pancakes. Slowly, Jack relaxed, but he couldn’t seem to keep his gaze from the stack of pancakes. Finally, Lucifer looked over at him, and his gaze softened, if only for a moment. He pulled a random pancake from the stack and made to pass it to him. “Here-” And then he paused, looking closer at the pancake. “What the hell is this, boy?” 

 

A cold shiver of fear made its way up Jack’s spine.

 

~•~•~•~•

 

Kelly was walking briskly as the first few rays of sun made their way through the rooftops nearby. She walked with purpose, keeping her head down as she got back from the zombie shift. She had one last stop to make before she got back to the house. 

 

She stopped at the door, glancing briefly at the “open 24 hours” sign, before quickly pushing her way in. She was greeted cheerfully by the man behind the counter, who had donned a full chef’s outfit. “Hello again, Kelly!” Many of the other frequent customers there smiled or nodded at her briefly before turning back to their food. “I’ll go get Castiel for you.” The man smiled, walking into the back, his chef’s hat wobbling comically. 

 

“Thank you, Ash!” Kelly called out, sitting down at a booth made for two.

 

A moment later, a very tired Castiel walked out of the back room, holding two steaming plates high, and still managing to smile. He dropped one off at a nearby table, where the homeless man sitting there began to devour it greedily. Next, he made his way over to Kelly, finally sitting down across from her. He put down the plate, piled high with omlettes, hashbrowns, and bacon, along with other assorted breakfast foods. For himself, there was merely a hot coffee, which he took a sip out of in an attempt to rejuvenate himself.

 

“What’s the special occasion?” Kelly chuckled, looking at Cas quizzically. She reached out hesitantly towards the huge plate of food, her hunger overriding her sense of guilt, as it always did.

 

“You don’t remember?” Cas smiled at her wearily, taking another sip of his coffee. “It’s our ten year anniversary.” 

 

Kelly brought her hand to her mouth, gasping. He was right. “You remembered?” Her eyes teared up slightly. Castiel was probably the most amazing man she’d ever met.

 

~•~•~•~•

  
“I asked you a question, you little shit. Answer me!” Lucifer scowled. 

 

“I-it’s burnt…” Jack finally made out, averting his gaze from the offending pancake. “It must have happened when I hurt myself, Sir, I’m sorry!” 

 

“What do I say about excuses,  _ Jack _ ?” Lucifer spit out his name. 

 

“For every excuse I make, I the punishment just gets worse,” Jack whispered, his eyes tearing up. 

 

“Luckily, I’m feeling merciful today. Lucifer snarled. “I’m in a good mood. Eat your pancake in your room, and then clean it.”    
  
Jack nodded slowly and grabbed the minuscule, blackened pancake. He knew by "clean it" Lucifer didn't have anything specific in mind, but it wouldn't be hard to find something. He tried to dart past Lucifer and make it to his room, but Lucifer grabbed his arm, his fingernails digging into the band aid on his arm. Jack let out a small whimper. “And, boy?” Lucifer looked Jack right in the eye.

 

~•~•~•~•

 

Kelly’s eyes sparkled as she ate her food, listening to Cas’ rhythmic voice. Every anniversary warranted a story, and this year, it was amazing.

 

“The first year we started up this business, I remember you coming in, looking around, and whispering, asking us if this place was open. You were our first customer. I remember Ash and Benny working to whip you up something in the kitchen, while I sat and talked with you. You told me about Jack, though he was only five or six at the time. How old is he now? Sixteen?” Cas looked at Kelly for confirmation.   
  
“Almost sixteen,” Kelly smiled a little bit. “He’s grown up so fast.” She took another large bite of the omelette Cas had given her, smiling blissfully. “This is amazing! I remember when you couldn’t even cook!”

 

Cas smiled at that memory and gave her a moment before continuing. “We brought you so much food you could barely eat it all. I remember you opening up to us about Lucifer, and how you were worried he abused Jack. I remember you explaining to me your fears that Jack would grow up scared and abused, and that Lucifer, who had wedged his way into your life, would control him. That he would end up afraid of the world, underfed, unloved. I remember the fear in your eyes. It wasn’t even the second week when we were preparing you extra food to bring home for Jack, even if it was slightly overcooked. It wasn’t even three more until we realized that you had memorized the nights that I worked.” Cas chuckled at that, and Kelly laughed with him.

 

“What can I say? You were always so kind. And…” Kelly trailed off. “There aren’t many people who don’t see my son as an abomination. I just wish I could get rid of Lucifer without being sure he wouldn’t hurt Jack.” She closed her eyes. 

 

Cas smiled sadly. “You were so scared, so alone.” He touched her hair softly. “I couldn’t just leave you like that. And I know you know this already, but your son will always be accepted by Dean and I.” 

 

“Oh yes, how is Dean?” Kelly leaned in for the gossip, her eyes glittering at the chance to change the topic. “When are you going to propose?”

 

"When are you going to move in?" Cas simply replied. 

 

"The house wasn't mine to give away, you know that. I have to stay there." Kelly smiled at him. He offered this every time. "Not the point. When will you propose?"

 

Cas smiled just a little, and scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “Well, I haven’t found the perfect time yet, but I hope that no matter when it is, he’ll say yes.” He carried the ring on him everywhere now. 

 

Kelly looked Cas right in the eye, knowing how he felt. “Trust me Cas, he’ll say yes. You and I both know he’s the one. It’s my turn to talk now. I remember the first day after you met him that you came in here. Your smile was a little brighter, and you had a little more bounce in your step. You wouldn’t stop talking to me about his hair, his eyes, his voice. I knew immediately that you had finally found him, Cas. I was the same way with Jefferson.” She smiled wistfully. 

 

“Well, I’m sure he would have been proud of you for hanging on so long, but you don’t have to worry about Lucifer anymore,” Cas smiled even brighter, beginning to rustle around mysteriously behind him as he did so. 

 

“Excuse me?” Kelly looked up, confused at the sudden change in topic. 

 

Cas slowly pulled out a packet of papers from behind him, passing them silently over to Kelly, who took them with a questioning look in her eyes. 

 

As she read them, her eyes filled with tears once more. “Cas! You didn’t have to!”

 

~•~•~•~•

 

Even as Jack struggled to get away, he looked back at Lucifer. “Yes, Sir?” 

 

“Don’t go getting any ideas about me lightening up. I’m just too stoned right now to punish you properly.” Lucifer took another bite of the pancakes Jack had spent so much time preparing. 

 

Quickly, Jack fled to his room, curling up as tightly as he could on his bed, his blanket protectively around him. With shaky hands, he pulled a box out from under his bed. It was mahogany, with intricate carvings around the outer rim, his last gift from his father before he died. 

 

Inside were many different photos of his life before his mom had brought home Lucifer, and even a few after. There was one of him and his mom with Lucifer, all three of them smiling happily. Lucifer still looked slightly disheveled, but Jack had accepted him as a father figure instantly. 

 

He could still remember his mom’s words.  _ This man has even less than us, Jack, ok? We need to do what little good we can in this world. _ When he had nodded, yes he understood, his mom had pulled him into a hug. She was so proud of him for just being himself, for accepting others, as everyone should. Lucifer didn’t do that anymore, like he did when Jack was younger.

 

Jack took a moment to do the mental math. He was five when his father died, and six when Lucifer came into their family. It had taken Lucifer approximately a month to show his true colors, to start drinking too much, staying out too late, and spending too much of their money. The money his mom stayed out late doing double shifts to provide for them. By then, it was too late. 

 

Jack knew he was the reason his mother didn’t force Lucifer out. He knew it was because she was scared he’d kill Jack. He knew he was too scrawny to fight back, and he knew that was why she put up with him. Jack’s heart hurt just thinking about that, and he moved on.

 

This one was an older picture. He didn’t remember much about his father, but he could faintly recall his smile, which always stretched the widest when he was with his family. He could remember his broad shoulders, which he would sometimes let Jack ride on. Other than that, his father could have been anyone. The man in the picture had his father’s smile, and he had his broad shoulders, yes, but if you had told Jack that this man was his father, he would have to take your word for it. In the picture, his father had dark brown hair, but if you had asked Jack to confirm this fact, he would be left unable to answer. Knowing he would never really have  _ known  _ made Jack’s heart hurt even more, and once again, he moved on, shuffling some other pictures aside.

 

The very last picture in the box was one of him and his mother from when he was very young, probably about three. It was taken by a polaroid camera, and it was cheesy and cliche, and his favorite picture in the whole world, mostly because he knew that his father, his true father, had been the- one to take this picture. 

 

His mom looked truly happy, the large bags under her eyes gone, her face untouched by the years of Lucifer living under their roof.  She was wearing a pretty white sundress, with red poppies covering it. She had had to throw the sundress out many years ago when Lucifer had spilled salsa across the pristine white fabric, ruining it.

 

~•~•~•~•

 

Cas smiled happily at Kelly’s reaction, something between shock and pure, unbridled joy. “Restraining order. He can’t come within a hundred yards of you or your son ever again,” he explained, though he and Kelly both knew exactly what it was already.

 

“This… this is more than I could ever ask for,” Kelly looked up at Cas, confused. “How did you-?”

 

“Don’t ask stupid questions,” Cas smiled at her, his tone incredibly soft. “You know that my father is... very rich.”   
  
“When are you going to tell your father about this place?” Kelly asked him, still overcome with emotions but managing to gesture around the small diner. 

 

Cas tapped the table thoughtfully, thinking back to his father. “I haven’t seen him since Gabe’s wedding, and even then…” Cas could remember how his knuckles had turned white, how his father had breezed past him to look at Gabe, how he hadn’t even spared him a second glance. He thought back to his last argument with Chuck, the one that was never really resolved, and mirrored their first argument all those years ago almost perfectly. 

 

_ “But Dad, they’re people, just like us!” Cas held his arms out desperately, in a last ditch attempt to convince his father. “They didn’t ask for the universe to screw them over!”  _

 

_ “Son. When you start a business like mine, you must understand, charity doesn’t have a place in the world of higher men.” Chuck sighed, his head in his hands.  _

 

_ “Dad. The rate of homelessness is directly corresponding with the numbers in each state of those that are unmarked.” Cas was controlling his breathing, but still trembling with barely controlled anger. “We have the power to help them. So fine, you and your multi million business won’t give them jobs, fine! But maybe, you could, oh I don’t know, have a food drive or something? These people are literally going to starve over the winter, hell, they’re starving now!”  _

 

_ “You can’t help everyone, Castiel. You should know that by now.” His dad frowned. “When did you begin to care so much about the unmarked anyways?” Dean’s out there waiting for you! You’re fine never coming in contact with them, ever! And as my son, you’d better not. You can’t jeopardize my reputation like that, you hear me?” His dad calmed himself down, re-addressing his son. “You’ll see, when Dean comes, you’ll forget this stupid endeavor altogether.” The confidence in his voice was sickening. _

 

_ Cas’ face turned red with fury, and he stormed out of the room.  _

 

_ “Son! Get back in here!” His dad called out, and when he didn’t respond, and a door slammed, “Castiel! You get back over here right now!” _

 

_ Cas had remembered his reaction the first time he had that conversation. A few weeks later, he and some people he’d contacted online had set up a relatively stable plan, despite not knowing each other at all. They were going to help people, the way his dad never wanted to. It’s not like his dad was going to walk in and find out anyway, he was going on a year long business trip. This time, however, he just sat down very calmly, and called Dean.  _

 

_ “Hey Babe, want to go somewhere?”  _ __   
  


“Probably never. I started it to help people, and I can’t do that if it gets shut down by my enraged father.” Cas stirred his coffee absently with a small spoon, finally addressing Kelly.

 

Kelly frowned. “And what about Dean?” 

 

Cas smiled. “It hasn’t become a problem yet, since I only work three night shifts per week, but I feel like it might, soon.” 

 

“Ooh,” Kelly had her poker face on. “I see. I understand  _ completely. _ ” She leaned forward a little, staring at Cas as she did so, barely containing her huge grin.

 

A soft blush began to cover Cas’ face. “Shut up… I’ll tell him tonight, ok?” 

 

Kelly laughed again, tossing her hair and beginning to stand up, checking the time as she did. “Well, Cas, thanks for everything, but I should get back. I know Jack will be up, and…” She trailed off, hefting the papers as her voice grew somber. They both knew about what went unspoken.

 

Cas finally smiled. “Best of luck.” He got up as well, hugging her tightly, before holding her at arm's length once again. “Happy anniversary.” He whispered, pressing a small kiss to her forehead.

 

“Happy anniversary,” Kelly replied as she left the diner with a spring to her step and the biggest smile she’d worn in a while. 

 

Cas watched her for a moment before picking up the plates and heading to the back room to clean them.

 

~•~•~•~•

 

Cas got home around eight, his trashy car pulling into the driveway. He had left the diner in good hands, as he always did during the day. He was positive there would be a rush of customers, since every anniversary not only was the first meal of the night free, but there was a heavy discount on the second, enough that anyone could easily purchase seconds if they wanted. Cas was concerned that they’d run out of food, like they did the first anniversary, when they tried making every meal bottomless. They’d had to send Ash out to buy more food several times. 

 

Walking into his house and shutting the door quietly, he turned around and came face to face with Dean. Cas nearly jumped out of his skin. 

 

Dean grinned at him. “Jeez, Cas, and here I thought you’d be happy to see me!” Gabe was lounging on the couch behind him, cuddled up with Sam. They were snuggling together under the blanket, and Gabe’s head was nestled by Sam’s collarbone. Sam was stroking his hair softly and muttering something to him.

 

Cas calmed his racing heart as he pecked Dean on the cheek, setting down his house keys. “Hey babe. Sorry.”

 

Dean laughed. “Come on, we set up Game of Thrones.” He paused a moment. “Wait a sec, here were you? Gabe said you would both be home today.” 

 

Cas looked at Dean once more, making a split second decision. “Where I am every Monday, Thursday, and Sunday night, working the zombie shift at my business.” He braced himself for the onslaught of questions.

 

“Wha- Cas you have a business you never told me about?” Gabe called out from the couch. 

  
  
“Well, it’s less of a business and more of a charity…” And Cas told them everything. He told them why he did it, why he didn’t tell anyone, how he’d done this for literal years and why he loved to do it. “-and if you could just see their faces when they bite into their first real food in months, Dean, you’d understand why I do it too,” Cas finished, looking over Dean’s face carefully. Surprisingly for Cas, he was sporting a huge grin.

 

“Cas, that’s amazing!” Sam spoke up from the couch. 

  
  
“Seriously, Cassie, why didn’t you tell me?” Gabe said, in a mockery of a whine. 

 

“I just didn’t want it to be…” Cas chose his words carefully. “Compromised.” He turned back to Dean, who still hadn’t said anything. “Dean?”

 

“I love you.” Dean kissed him solidly on the lips, and Cas blushed as he kissed him back. When they finally pulled apart, Dean spoke again. “You’re amazing. I’m not even mad. Just…” Dean shook his head. “You’re amazing,” He repeated. 

 

Cas looked deep into Dean’s eyes again. He could see his gaze flicker to his own lips, and he saw Dean swallow. His hand absentmindedly reached out to caress Dean’s cheek softly.

 

“Ok this is great and all, but I’m just here to watch Game of Thrones, so if we’re not going to do that, then…” Gabe called out. 

 

Sam smacked him lightly, scolding him as he did so. “Gabe! We have literally all day to do this!”

 

Gabe’s squabbles of protest eventually were silenced by a long and drawn out kiss.

 

Dean and Cas just rolled their eyes, and went to sit down next to Sam and Gabe, who were back to cuddling on the couch. Life was good.

 

~•~•~•~•


	9. Getting Settled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again everyone! We’re back to our usual schedule. This chapter contains more or less the last of Jack’s suffering, but first- fluff! And a little bit of explanation and closing up plot holes and/or confusion. I’m sorry in advance...

 

Cas and Dean were eating out. The mall bustled with people, so many people. Cas found himself watching them. There was a girl, following her stuttering girlfriend around. They seemed to be on their first date, and completely unsure of how to proceed. There was an old couple, who stood together, with each other’s names proudly displayed on their shoulders. Around the corner from them, a young boy with a blue name on his cheek handed a dollar to a man sitting on the corner, curled up in ragged clothing, an unmarked. Cas frowned slightly at this. He had given the man money earlier, and told him to stop by their un-named charity.He turned his gaze back to the young teenagers, when-

  
“Hello? Earth to Castiel.” Cas blinked at the voice. Dean was waving his hand in front of his face.    
  
“Huh?” Cas was jolted out of his mindset in surprise. 

 

“What’s on your mind, Angel?” Dean’s big green eyes looked him over slowly. “Talk to me.” 

 

Cas chose his next words very carefully. “Why is our society like this?” He asked. 

 

“Excuse me?” Dean was confused. “What exactly do you mean by that?”

 

“Soulmates. Because of this, this social expectation,” Cas frowned, “We never find out what kind of human that we enjoy spending time with, we never date unless they’re ‘the one’, and those who don’t have to listen to fate’s rules are punished for it!” Cas realized he was talking a little louder than necessary, and quieted down with a guilty look, putting his head down to avoid the stares of those passing by.

 

Dean looked at him. His gaze was soft, he knew the struggles as well as Cas. This just wasn’t something to be talked about in public. He lowered his voice as well, leaning in as he replied. “I don’t think the system works either, Cas, but we shouldn’t talk about this here, please.” Dean was nervous, and for good reason. It was an unspoken rule that you never spoke ill of the tattoos. 

 

Cas slowly nodded.  _ Something that brings so much pain to so many can’t be a good thing, _ he thought,  _ but it brought you Dean.  _ He smiled again. “Never mind.” 

 

Dean’s smile of relief was more than enough to make his heart swell with happiness. “So, happier topics. Have you talked to Gabe and Sammy recently?” 

 

“No, actually.” Cas smiled. “I think they’re finally on their honeymoon. It’s taken them long enough.” 

 

“That’s a relief.” 

 

Cas laughed. “I know, right? Well, at first they didn’t want to go on a honeymoon, and then Gabe started to get antsy, and then Sammy finally agreed to let Gabe spend some money on him. They’re supposed to be halfway across the world by now.” 

 

“Sammy was the one that didn’t want to go on the honeymoon?” Dean uncrossed and re-crossed his legs. “How did that happen?” 

 

“Well, I think he didn’t want to be dragged away from the family drama.” Cas took another small sip of his chocolate. “Or at least, that’s what Gabe said.”

 

“Or he was waiting until it was an adequate temperature outside… You know how he gets in the cold. You know, his hair gets all these ice crystals, and it freezes into position. He hates it.” Dean commented offhand.

 

Cas let out a full blown laugh at this. “Gabe’s even worse! He somehow never remembers to being warm clothing, like, ever. And then he just clings to you shivering.” 

 

“He and Sammy make a good match then. Sammy’s like a boy scout, he never forgets to bring anything.” 

 

They both spared a moment to chuckle.

 

There was a lull in the conversation, and they both sat there with one another, in comfortable silence.

 

  * ~•~•~•~•



 

Later that day, Cas and Dean were sitting together on Cas’ sofa. They were cuddling together and watching some random sappy movie, a guilty pleasure of Dean’s, and one that Sam would never let him live down if he knew. 

 

“Cas, why don’t you have your own house?” Dean finally asked. He didn’t want to overstep, but it was something he’d been wondering for a while. He was asking simply because Cas was clearly not hurting for money, and he had every reason to try and get out of the house. Gabe had his own house as well, which he and Sam had moved into, and from what Dean could tell, all of the other kids in the Novak family had houses of their own as well. 

 

He was surprised when Cas simply chuckled. “I think you misunderstand.” He gestured around him. “This  _ is _ my house.” 

 

“Wait a second.” Dean sat up, taking his head off of Cas’ chest. (Another guilty pleasure, Dean was the little spoon.) “You mean to tell me that this magnificent, four story household that we’re sitting in right now belongs to you? Not your father?” 

 

“Well,” Cas smiled. “After Gabe moved away, I was the oldest, so I got the house when I came of age, as long as I keep my sibling’s bedrooms open at all times, so that they may stop by when they please.” 

 

“You’re telling me your dad gave you the equivalent of a hotel as a college present?” Dean was shocked.

 

“I mean, if you want to look at it like that, sure.” Cas smiled and ran his fingers through Dean’s hair affectionately. “I was a little younger, though. I simply turned sixteen, and my father gave me the house keys when he was home from his business trip and left again. It wasn’t that different honestly. The house was always more mine than his, and my siblings are always welcome. Plus, my bed is more than big enough for two, if you were wondering.” 

 

Dean stared at him. “Wait, so if we decided to move in together, we’d already have a house?” 

 

“Do you want to move in with me?” Cas smiled at him. 

 

“...Well I mean, yeah. No duh.” Dean sat there for a moment, shocked at the unceremonious quality of the invitation. There was a moment of silence. “So should I move in like, tomorrow, or…” 

 

“I can help you move in anytime you want to, Dean.” Cas snuggled a little closer to him. 

 

“Thank you.” Dean whispered this, still a little stunned. 

 

There was another moment of silence. “Where did you live before you moved back in with your parents, Dean?” Cas had decided it was going to be a night for uncomfortable questions. 

 

“Well, I went to college for a while, but we couldn’t afford to keep me going, mostly because John wouldn’t pay for any of it. Sammy got practically a full ride to Stanford, but me?” Dean laughed, and Cas could detect a small note of bitterness. He continued stroking Dean’s hair soothingly. “I wasn’t ‘worth’ paying for, and I wasn’t... smart enough for scholarships. I just wasn’t worth the effort.”

 

“Stop that,” Cas whispered softly. 

 

“Huh?” Dean looked up at him, his face full of confusion.

 

“That. The thing where you decide that you’re not good enough based on someone else’s decisions. That thing where just because you chose to run a mechanics shop instead of going into  _ law,  _ you automatically assume you’re not good enough.” Cas frowned slightly, bringing his lips into Dean’s forehead. “You’re perfect just the way you are,” He mumbled to him.

 

Dean sighed happily and laid his head back onto Cas’ chest. His silent thank you was more than enough for Cas. 

 

  * ~•~•~•~•



 

Jack was sitting in a small chair, meant for someone about half his age. His whole face was streaked with tears and covered in bruises, and in his hands, he clutched his small wooden box tightly. The room was white, too white. It was blinding. His vision was blurred with tears, and with every new person that came through the room, he could feel accusatory stares. They looked over his ratty clothing, his unkempt hair, and the injuries all over his body. They all stared at him with the kind of sympathy no one wants. All of them except one. The woman was too kind, and his life was too broken for him to do anything but stare. 

 

“Ready to go, sweetie?” The short red haired woman finally squatted down in front of him again, her gaze sympathetic. Her name tag read ‘Charlie’. “We have a home all set up for you, and I think you’re really going to like it. Your new family just needs to sign some papers. They have clean clothes, a soft bed, and a shower, how would you like that?”

 

Jack got up silently. Fine, let them take him to the house. They wouldn’t want him anyway. He would go to an orphanage, and then another, and another. It didn’t matter anymore. His eyes were dull, but he followed the peppy woman out of the room nevertheless, following her bouncing hair. When she opened the car door for him, she gave him another of those little smiles, and he couldn’t find it in his heart to respond in kind. 

 

Charlie started up the car, pulling out into the road.

 

Driving to the house, Charlie sent Cas a text one handed.  _ Heading over.  _ She brushed her hair out of her face, checking through the rearview mirror on Jack.

 

He sent her three question marks back in response. 

 

She waited until they hit a red light.  _ It’s for work.  _ She quickly typed out.

 

More question marks. 

 

Rolling her eyes slightly, she ignored this. 

 

Another notification. _ Ok fine don’t tell me, but Dean’s over.  _

 

She waited until she pulled into Cas’ huge driveway, parking next to the black impala. So Dean was over. She hadn’t gotten to properly meet him during Gabe’s wedding, but she couldn’t focus on that right now. She was here on work. Briskly, she stepped out of the car, opening Jack’s door for him. 

 

“Come on, Jack.” She smiled at him once more, reaching out for his hand, but he shied slightly away from her touch, so she backed off quickly. He obediently followed her up to the door, where she reached up to grab the ornate brass knocker. 

 

The door swung forward before she could even knock once. “Charlie? What the hell?” Cas stood at the door. “You didn’t call me or-” He paused, giving her a once over, seeing her suit. “You’re in work clothes.” 

 

Charlie took a deep breath. “Can we come in? I think you should be sitting down for this.”

 

“Yeah, of course.” Cas let them both inside, despite his confusion. 

 

“Hey Charlie.” Dean poked his head out from around the corner. “Who’s the friend?” 

 

“Dean.” Charlie nodded briskly in his direction. 

 

“Oh, she’s in work clothes.” Dean observed, coming over to sat down on the couch with Cas, across from Charlie. 

 

“Come on sweetie,” Charlie motioned for Jack to sit next to her on the couch. He tentatively sat down, as far away as possible, wincing slightly as he did. “It’s ok Jack, they’re good people.”

 

“Wait, Jack? Jack Kline?” Cas’ eyes widened. “What’s he doing with you, Charlie? I was with his mom yesterday.”

 

Jack turned to face him, confusion plain on his face, even through all of the bruising. 

 

Charlie closed her eyes briefly. “Jack, honey, do you want to go explore the house? I need to talk to Cas here.” 

 

She waited patiently until Jack nodded slightly, getting up from the couch and beginning to walk out of the room. Once he was gone, Dean and Cas both started questions at once. 

 

“Who is that?” 

 

“Why do you have Kelly’s kid?” 

 

“Can he just wander the house? Is there anything we need to put away?”   
  


“Is Kelly ok?” 

 

Charlie put her hands up. “Woah. One at a time, guys.” She closed her eyes briefly. “Ok. Jack was placed in my care, as all unmarked are if there comes a time that they are underage and uncared for, that meaning under eighteen and without a living guardian.” 

 

“Excuse me?” Dean frowned. “Cas said he was just with Kelly yesterday.” 

 

Charlie had a sad little frown on her face. “Kelly was found in her house, by Jack actually, recently deceased. Her head was beat in completely, and there were choke marks around her throat. The autopsy showed that she seemed to have been bludgeoned for a significant period of time before she died, and many of her marks and injuries match the ones on Jack. Lucifer, their ‘housemate,’ was nowhere to be found.” 

 

Cas sucked in a quick breath, and Dean began to trace soothing circles on his back. “Was it him?” He made out. “Was it Lucifer who killed her? Oh god if I hadn’t gotten her the restraining order, she’d be fine…” 

 

“Eyewitness accounts state that he was at a bar during this time, and neighbors reported that a few hours before her death he stormed out of the house screaming curses at her, so he has a solid alibi.” Charlie leaned in, “But between you and me, the kid hasn’t said anything, but he has this haunted look in his eyes. You only see that in people who have seen someone they loved die.”

 

“Where was Jack?” Dean wondered, horrified. 

 

“Well, when he called, he said very little. He called nine one one, saying that he had found his mother unconscious, but by the time paramedics got there, she was dead. We have no way of knowing what he saw. He hasn’t spoken since, but he’s covered in marks as well, so we can only assume that he was attacked as well and keeping his mouth shut to protect someone, or out of fear.” 

 

Cas was blinking back tears as he listened to Charlie. “Where will he go now?” He asked tentatively, already knowing the answer. 

 

“Well, the unmarked in question would usually bounce around random orphanages and foster homes until they reached eighteen years of age-” Charlie started, and Cas opened his mouth to protest. “ _ But, _ ” She continued, “Jack is a special case. He’s already had a request for a home, put into his mother’s last will.” Charlie pulled out some fancy looking papers, and began to read.

 

“And if I an to die a premature death, before Jack Kline has reached eighteen years of age, I ask that he be sent to Castiel Novak of Novak Banking, and that he become his legal guardian until age eighteen, or longer, if circumstances require.” 

 

Charlie looked up from the will. “Unless you don’t want him, of course.” She said this with a sad look on her face, and Cas knew then that there had been other cases like Jack, where the person they were supposed to be looked after by declined. 

 

Dean looked over at Cas, and Cas’ eyes were pleading. Dean let out a small chuckle. “I think he’ll take him. Where does he have to sign?” 

 

A huge grin split across Charlie’s face, despite the circumstances, and she whipped out a big book that she appeared to have been sitting on. “Just here,” She passed over the book to Cas, and Dean grabbed a pen from their side table. 

 

Cas quickly signed his full name, and passed the papers back to Charlie. She leaned in. “Congrats Castiel, it’s a boy.” 

 

He gave her a look. “Really?” 

 

“Ok ok sorry.” She stood up. “Since I’m here during my work shift, this means I can’t linger and, ya know, drink with you cool kids.” Charlie grinned, the professional atmosphere shattering around her. 

 

“Before you go, do you think you could explain all of this to Jack? I don’t know, maybe even introduce us?” Cas shuffled, suddenly very nervous. He wasn’t ready yet for this parental commitment! 

 

Charlie nodded, and wandered off to find Jack. Dean took Cas’ hand in his. “Hey, it’s ok.” He soothed him.

 

Cas finally turned to dean, panic clear on his face. “Oh my gosh, Dean, I’m so sorry.” 

 

“What? Why are you sorry?” Dean was confused.

 

“I didn’t even give you a chance to decide whether or not you wanted kids! I don’t even know if you wanted a kid, let alone a newly sixteen year old child with emotional baggage that underwent trauma we can’t even imagine!” Cas was hyperventilating. “Oh god, what did I just do?” 

 

“Cas, Angel, it’s ok.” Dean was being irrationally calm about this. “Trust me, I wanted kids.”

 

“Oh, Dean what if I’m a terrible father? What if he hates me? What if-?” Cas was cut off by Charlie clearing her throat awkwardly, walking into the room. Jack was trailing behind her, looking concerned and clutching his wooden box. 

 

“Castiel, Dean, this is Jack. Jack, Castiel and Dean.” Charlie made room for Jack to stand next to her, which he did, though warily. 

 

“Hello Jack.” Cas’ voice cracked. “I know you don’t know me very well, but I knew your mother.” He hesitated a moment, before holding out his hand. 

 

“Castiel.” The boy’s voice was small, frightened, but his eyes looked up to meet Cas’. “My mother used to-” His eyes filled with tears as he choked up. 

 

Cas smiled at him sadly. “Welcome to your new home,” he offered shyly.

  
“Well, I gotta run, but Jack,” Charlie waited until Jack turned his head to look at her. “Here’s my number, please call me if you need to, ok?” She handed Jack a small business card. He stared at it a moment before looking back at her, betrayal clear on his face. 

 

“Hey, it’s ok Jack. I promise I’ll be back, ok?” Charlie saw that look quite a lot. It never failed to break her heart. 

 

“Tomorrow.” Jack looked at her hopefully. 

 

Looking over his head quickly at Cas and Dean, seeing them nod, Charlie turned back to Jack. “Sure, pinky promise.” 

 

As soon as Charlie ran out the door, an awkward silence fell over all of them. 

 

“So Jack,” Cas checked his watch. “We have about an hour before dinner, want us to help you find a room you like?” 

 

Jack nodded up at him, nodding a little before his eyes fell on Dean. 

 

“Oh, right! This is Dean, he was moving in today, he’s my boyfriend. I hope you don’t mind that.” Cas looked Jack’s face over nervously. “Ok.” He nodded to himself.  _ You can do this Cas. _

 

Dean gave Jack his nicest smile. “Come on buddy, let’s get you settled.” 

 

Jack walked up the stairs, and they followed him.    
  
“So we have many bedrooms here, Jack.” Cas was shuffling awkwardly, not sure whether to walk alongside, before, or after Jack. If not for Dean’s hand squeezing his, he felt he would have collapsed from a heart attack. “This is Anna’s,” a simple room colored in pastels. “Luci’s (and Michael’s when he stays),” The room was simple enough, and looked like nothing more than a guest room, since they had a house, and she had moved out anyway as soon as possible.  

 

“Uriel’s- he was from mother’s first relationship, Dean,  _ that’s _ why he didn’t get the house even though he’s the oldest,” Another simple and boring room, colored in darker shades of purple, but more lived in than Luci’s. “He visits for a week or two every season, checks in. He’s nice, you’d like him.” 

 

“Balthazar’s… He’s only nine months younger than me,” Balthazar’s room was a pleasing shade of blue, and would have been quite nice looking, if it was not covered in posters from  _ The Titanic,  _ all with huge red X’s through them. 

 

Dean opened his mouth to comment, but Cas cut him off. “Don’t ask… He has an obsession.” 

 

Jack gave the room a strange look as he passed it. Dean couldn’t really blame him. Balthazar had seemed like a strange dude from what he had seen in passing of him at the wedding, though his heart was definitely in the right place.

 

He listed all of his siblings names as he passed their rooms, even though a simple golden plaque adorned most of the doors. “Here’s baby Raphael's, he’ll be coming back to live with me soon, Anna is caring for him right now, and I’m next on the list.” Cas made a mental note to purchase diapers and such asap. “And lastly…” They approached one of the last doors in the white hallway. It was adorned with various candy decals, lollipops and candy canes, gumdrops and marshmallows. 

 

Dean stifled a laugh. Typical Gabriel. His room seemed lavish in comparison to the other’s rooms, and much messier as well, as candy wrappers adorned every open surface. There also seemed to be a working cotton candy machine in the corner. He found the room quite cheesy, however, when he stole a glance at Jack, his eyes had visibly brightened as he took in the room. 

 

Gabe’s room was across the hall from Cas’, and now Dean’s as well. Their door was closed, but Cas knew if they opened it, they’d only find the boxes from Dean’s small apartment and parent’s house inside. 

 

They moved on to the last few rooms in the hallway. Jack had three to choose from. Cas decided to walk into each one. “So this is our first ‘guest’ room,” He added, allowing Jack to observe. The room was done up in light blues, with white trim. There was a blue bed with a canopy, also trimmed in white, with silk sheets. Whenever Charlie stayed over, she usually stayed here. It was nice, but not quite what Jack had wanted, as he communicated with a quick shake of the head and a “No thank you.”. 

 

The next room was directly across from it, and done in deep reds and chartreuses, with a simple bed tucked in the corner. This room was all sharp angles and corners, and Cas couldn’t fault Jack for his “No thank you,” here either. It didn’t seem to suit him. 

 

The very last room was at the end of the hall, and from the moment they stepped into it, Cas could tell that it was the one for Jack. 

 

The room opened up into a large private balcony at the back of the house, much as Cas and Dean’s room did on the side, and the whole room seemed to be radiating a golden glow. The walls were a very light green, and the floor was light as well, though much of the birch was not visible. A fluffy carpet to match the walls covered most of the floor. The bed was a bunk bed tucked in the other corner, though the bottom bunk had been removed to make space for a desk underneath. The bed was supported by more birch poles, and though stripped of sheets now, Cas knew there were matching ones in a pile somewhere in the closet. There was a beanbag in the other corner, by a large empty bookbag. 

 

When Jack looked back at Cas, there was hope in his eyes, and thanks. There was a fair amount of pain as well, but definitely hope as well. Cas felt Dean squeeze his arm one last time as Jack placed the worn wooden box on the desk. 

 

This kid needed their help, and Cas would be damned if he didn’t give him what he needed.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT INFO: Ok so the legal system here is completely different if you’re an unmarked, they have special clinics with designated people to try and find them good homes, orphanages, etc. Also, since they’re seen as the lower class here, it’s much easier to gain legal rights and guardianship. 
> 
> So that’s the chapter! Next time, you get to see them take Jack shopping, and for dinner! I’m super psyched to write it, and I hope you’re just as excited to read it! Have a great day everyone.


	10. Sweet Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes, writer’s block really hit me hard on this one. So I’m finally back with the tenth chapter! I’m amazed we got this far, and even more touched by all of your support. Thank you so much for giving it a read, kudos, comment, whatever. Without further ado...

As soon as Jack had set himself up, Dean suggested dinner. 

 

“That sounds like a great idea, Dean.” Cas smiled, now directing his attention to Jack. “Anywhere in particular you want to go, Jack?” 

 

Jack stared at him in confusion. 

 

“We need to go get you some stuff anyway, so we might as well make a whole night out of it,” Cas explained. “Would you like to go for pizza, or Italian, Chinese..?” he trailed off. 

 

“Italian sounds… nice.” Jack looked at Cas and Dean. “How will I pay you back for my food?” His voice broke a little. “I don’t have any money.” 

 

“Wha- Jack we pay for the meal! Or rather… Cas does.” Dean leaned in a little like he was telling a secret. “If you didn’t know, he’s loaded.” This got a small smile out of Jack, which Dean considered a personal victory.

 

“Come on, I’ll grab my wallet and we can head out in just a second.” Cas stood up suddenly, flinching internally as Jack recoiled slightly, fear crossing his face for a brief moment.  _ It’s ok,  _ he wanted to whisper,  _ you’re safe now. _

 

As soon as they got to the car, confusion broke out on Jack’s face. Cas smirked. “I don’t like fancy cars.”

 

Jack’s eyes then flitted to examine the impala, sleek and black, pulled in next to Cas’ light beige car. Dean wasn’t even sure you could call that thing a piece of junk a car.    
  
“Luckily for this family’s reputation,  _ I  _ like fancy cars.” Dean smiled. “This is my Baby, and she’s just about the nicest car you’ll ever ride in. Alas…” Dean clutched his heart dramatically, “You’ll have to ride in Cas’ car tonight. He’s driving, and that means we’re taking the pimp car.” 

 

“Hey, I get great gas mileage in the pimp car!” Cas shot back, walking around the edge of their driveway to his car door. Dean opted for the passenger seat, leaving Jack to take the backseat.

 

He yanked once, twice, but the door refused to open. 

 

Dean rolled his eyes. “You’ve got to really yank on it. The door sticks sometimes and this idiot,” he jerked his hand back at Cas, “refuses to get it fixed.”

 

Jack nodded, finally getting the door open and buckling himself in quietly. Cas pulled out of the driveway after checking in the rearview mirror that Jack had successfully done at least that.

 

As they drove down the road at a reasonable speed, Cas nervously checked on Jack throughout the entirety of the ride. He was looking out the window at the cars passing by, occasionally shifting his glance again to the interior of the car, not that there was much to see, not saying anything. Cas wasn’t sure if he should initiate a conversation, or just leave the teen to sit there silently and take in his new situation. Eventually, he opted for the latter, turning on the radio.

 

Taylor Swift blared through the speakers, the volume as high as it would go. Cas nearly crashed the car.

 

Quickly, Dean switched it off with a nervous laugh. No one stepped forward to fill the silence, so they just sat there.

 

When they finally pulled up to the Italian restaurant, the tense silence became nearly unbearable.  _ Cas has no idea what he’s doing,  _ Dean thought, not for the first time that evening. He leaned over and kissed Cas on the cheek reassuringly. 

 

Cas blushed immediately, fumbling with the door even as he opened it. “What was that for?” He managed to make out.  _ God, it’s like when I first met him all over again, and had no idea what to say,  _ he thought to himself.  _ Get a grip, Cas. _

 

Dean just smiled dreamily at him. “You,” he responded simply. “Come on, let’s go inside. Unless it’s too fancy for your exquisite tastes.”

 

“Haha,” Cas monotoned, closing his door. “Come on, Jack, let’s head in.” 

 

After another brief struggle with the car door, he was out with them, though even as they walked in, he lagged behind, his head down and his shoulders set.

 

The moment they walked in, little bell on the door ringing softly, the brunette man behind the counter looked up, eyes widening as he took them in. “Hey, Dean! Long time no see!” 

 

Dean blinked, before grinning back at the slightly younger man, walking over to hug him. “No way! Adam? You didn’t tell me you got a new job! How are you doing man? How’s Samandriel? How’s college?”

 

“He’s doing great! Since he started his transition, he’s been much happier.” Adam beamed happily, and Jack noticed red writing spiraling down the side of his neck and into his shirt. He felt shame run through his entire body the longer he looked. 

 

_ Unmarked filth.  _

 

Quickly, Jack looked away from his neck, filling his head with thoughts of his mother.  _ Breathe. _

 

Adam and Dean were discussing something. “You have got to visit us on campus sometime.” Adam gushed, turning then to Cas. “And Castiel Novak!  Such a nice surprise to see you dining at our establishment! Table for three?” 

 

“Thank you Adam, that would be wonderful.” Cas smiled as he followed the man to an open booth, overlooking a small creek. They all sat down, Jack next to Cas, and Dean whispered something in Adam’s ear. He nodded, and left with a small smile and a squeeze of Dean’s shoulder. 

 

“So how do you know him?” Cas asked. 

 

“He’s actually my brother.” Dean smiled. “Well… kind of. He actually came over from Germany as a transfer student. He stayed with my family for a while when we were all younger. I haven’t seen him in a few years!” Dean had a reminiscent look in his eye. 

 

“You’ve never mentioned him before.” Cas noted. “Did something happen?” 

 

“Mmh, no. Not really.” Dean shrugged. “He left of his own accord, when he turned eighteen.” Then Dean leaned in, as if he was telling them an especially exciting secret. “Samandriel, his boyfriend, used to be named Samantha.” 

 

“Ok, that’s great. Good for him.” Cas was confused. 

 

“When Samandriel told Adam he wanted to change his name, Adam’s tattoo changed as well.” Dean’s eyes sparkled with pride and happiness. “How cool is that?” He grinned. “They were both so happy when they told me, they were crying.” Then his face got darker. “But Samandriel’s parents weren’t happy. They had wanted to raise the ‘perfect catholic daughter.’ So, Samandriel and Adam left. It seems like they haven’t been doing too shabby either, since then.” He finished. 

 

“We could have them over some time, Dean. I would love to get to know your younger brother and his boyfriend.” Cas smiled.

 

“And we would love to meet you.” Adam was back, placing three waters in front of them, as well as a small basket of bread. “I’m glad Dean finally found you, Castiel.”  

 

Cas smiled. “I’m glad as well.” 

  
Adam turned to Dean, whispering something in his ear. Dean blushed slightly and chuckled. “Shut up. Can you just bring us the usual?” 

 

“Will do.” Before leaving again, Adam asked them one more question. “Do any of you have any allergies?” 

 

They all shook their heads unanimously. 

 

“Fantastic.” And with another small smile adorning his lips, Adam left.

 

“He didn’t even take our orders?” Cas was confused. He reached for a piece of bread.

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Dean smiled, also ripping open a warm roll. “Just wait. You won’t regret it.” 

 

“Whatever you say… So, Jack,” Cas turned to look at him. “Where would you like to go shopping after this?” 

 

Jack looked at him, confused, his mouth full of . “What do you mean?” His voice was quiet, hoarse from not being used, and shaky, but the question remained. 

 

“I mean, like which places? I understand if you don’t want to go somewhere fancy, but there’s a perfectly nice Target down the street from here, and a Macy’s downtown. Also, don’t quote me on this, but I believe there’s both a JC Penny and an Old Navy somewhere nearby.”

 

Jack smiled slightly, looking shaken up by the options. “Target?” 

 

“Target it is, then! Right after we finish whatever food Dean has mysteriously ordered for us…” Cas smiled then, looking at the three of the from an outside perspective. They almost looked like a family. 

 

Dean, it turned out, had ordered them a very large pizza. As Adam brought it to their table, holding it above his head,  there were murmurs and gasps. He set it down, along with plates for the three of them.

  
_ Thank you _ ’s were said, and Adam once again departed, though not before giving Dean a small scrap of paper containing his new phone number. Apparently, Samandriel’s parents had been calling him on the old one. Cas cut politely into his pizza, raising a small bite to his mouth, before looking up to see Dean shoving pizza into his mouth.

 

“Dean,” Cas chided, his knee bumping Dean’s under the table. He smiled as Dean’s cheeks colored with embarrassment. 

 

“Sorry.” He lowered the slice, mirroring Cas as he set down his pizza and took up a fork and knife instead. Then he turned to Jack, who was sitting there quietly. “Jack, why don’t you dig in?”

 

Jack looked up at him, his blue eyes full of confusion and fear. “You hadn’t finished what you wanted to yet. I didn’t want to take anything you might-”

 

“No. We don’t do that here.” Dean frowned as he interrupted Jack. “Take some, it’s stuffed crust. You’ll love it.” 

 

Hesitantly, Jack cut off a piece of pizza, and took a bite. Almost immediately, a look of bliss crossed his face, and he began devouring it even faster than Dean had been. He had finished his second slice before Cas had even finished his first, and was about to grab a third before his manners seemed to kick in. He leaned back visibly from the large pizza, an embarrassed blush adorning his face. 

 

“It’s ok,” Cas smiled at him, taking another piece for him and setting it on his plate. “You can eat as much as you want to here. Have you ever eaten stuffed crust before?” 

 

Jack responded simply with another bashful smile and shake of his head before digging in. 

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

They pulled into the parking lot behind the mall, much to Cas’ relief.  _ I’m glad that Jack didn’t want super expensive clothing,  _ he thought as they walked through the sliding doors.  _ Not that I couldn’t provide that, but I have absolutely no idea what fancy clothes look good, and which are terrible. Plus, all of them are incredibly uncomfortable.  _ He chuckled a little at that, and a short man passing by gave him a strange look. They entered Target.

 

As soon as they entered the male’s section, Jack’s eyes widened. Cas could understand. There were a lot of choices. Luckily, Dean seemed to have some kind of mental know how to deal with this. 

 

“Ok Jack, we need to get you a full wardrobe, and we have to start somewhere. Would you like to look at long sleeve shirts, short sleeve shirts, or jeans first?” Dean asked.  _ God he loved this man.  _

 

Jack looked wordlessly to Cas, who shrugged. “We’re near the shirts. Might as well start there.”

 

In the end, they got him five pairs of jeans in various shades of blue, though Jack tended to favor the darker shades. They also got four long sleeved shirts, two in white and two in dark green. He got light and dark blue striped short sleeve shirts. Jack had also found a beige jacket with dark brown designs on it that he seemed to absolutely adore, and even though it was more expensive than all the shirts combined, Cas bought it for him. He also saw Dean throw some oversized flannels into the cart, for sleepwear. All Cas could think was  _ gee, I hope he likes plaid. _

 

Lastly, they stopped in at Hot Topic, because he had seen it on the way in and questioned what it was like. Not really knowing, what was inside, they agreed to check it out on the way back to the car. Jack had found a Panic at the Disco shirt, which excited him, since apparently it was always on in the bar where he had occasionally worked for pocket change and tips. He stumbled across another with a Hogwarts crest on it, since Harry Potter was Jack’s favorite book in the house, (Sam was going to be thrilled) and one last lilo and stitch tank top, because Jack could remember his mother bringing him to watch it when he was quite little. He also found a Hufflepuff beanie that seemed to fascinate him, black with the badger on the front, so they added that to the cart as well. 

 

By the time they made it home, pulling into Cas’ gravel driveway, everyone was exhausted. “Watch the landscaping,” Dean advised. 

 

They assisted Jack in putting away all of his clothes. Now came the hardest part- leaving him for the night.

 

“Ok, we’ll be right down the hall, okay Jack?” Cas asked him, concerned. He didn’t want to baby him too much, but he was worried Jack would be uncomfortable during his first night in the big house. “We’re going to stay up and watch a little tv together. Please don’t hesitate to call us if you need anything.” 

 

Jack hesitated, fear clear on his face, before nodding. Then, he surprised both cas and Dean, pulling them into a weak hug, burying his face in Cas’ shirt. “Thank you,” He whispered, same as he had countless times at the store.

 

“No problem, kid.” Dean smiled at him. 

 

“Yeah,” Cas smiled, choking up a little bit. “No problem.” 

 

As soon as Jack had retired and Cas had stopped fretting, he and Dean sat down on the couch together, Dean’s leg draped casually across his lap. “I love you, you know?” Cas smiled at him, speaking up as he flipped casually through the channels. 

 

“Oh, really?” Dean smirked. 

 

“You’re so amazing with Jack, and I just threw this upon you, and you didn’t have to stay-” Cas was stopped by a finger resting gently on top of his lips. He looked over into Dean’s green eyes, seeing him frowning slightly. 

 

“What did I tell you about doubting any of your decisions here?” Dean looked deep into his eyes. 

 

“Uh,” Cas stammered, “Nothing? I think…” 

 

A small smirk was now adorning Dean’s face. “Well, I’m saying it now. Any of  _ this _ ,” he gestured to Cas’ concerned face and anxious manner, “will be swiftly halted by and remedied via a surprise tickle fight.” 

  
Cas’ eyes widened. He was extremely ticklish, and Dean knew it.”You wouldn’t…” 

 

“Try me.” Dean’s eyes sparkled mirthfully.Then, his tone became more serious. “In all honesty, Cas, it’s amazing what you did for Jack, and I couldn’t be more proud to have someone as my soulmate.” 

 

Cas smiled, blushing under his gaze. “I just hope I can pull it off… for his sake as much as ours.” 

 

“I’m positive that you will.” Dean stroked Cas’ hair back affectionately. “You’re amazing.” 

 

“You’re the better one with kids, out of the two of us.” Cas replied, offhand. 

 

“Yeah, well, practically raising your younger brother by hand will do that to you.” Dean’s smile remained intact, though his eyes were back in faraway times, pain evident on his beautiful face. 

 

Cas pulled him in for another kiss, cupping his face gently as their lips brushed together. His skin was warm. 

 

They cuddled for a while, letting each other be calmed by the other’s presence. Game of Thrones was on behind them, though the volume was on low, nothing that could startle or even minorly concern them. All that mattered was that they had each other. 

 

Dean traced Cas’ forearm, traced the four letters bringing them together at that very moment. He loved the way that Cas stroked his hair every time he finished tracing the tattoo. “You know, I think this’ll be good.” 

 

“Hmm?” Cas hummed slightly, looking to him. 

 

“Jack being here. This’ll be good for us. He’ll be good for us.” Dean elaborated. 

 

“I just hope we’re good enough for him.” Cas looked down the hall. “He needs good people in his life.” 

 

“I think we’ll all be okay.” The ghost of a smile was tugging at Dean’s lips. “Trust me, Cas, you don’t give yourself enough credit. Also, you’re headed dangerously close into tickle territory,” he warned. 

 

“You were the one who brought it up this time!” 

 

Dean just chuckled. “I love you…” He singsonged, and Cas could swear that he felt his heart melting.

 

“I love you too,” Cas snuggled a little closer to Dean, feeling his eyes droop with sleepiness. A small yawn escaped his lips, and he felt Dean lean over and kiss his nose before untangling himself and standing up. 

 

He heard, “Come on, Sunshine,” and then Dean was picking him up, and walking him down the hall to their bedroom. “We can’t have you sleeping on the couch, not when we have this million dollar mattress right down the hall.” 

 

He just blinked at him sleepily, the ghost of a smile adorning his lips. 

 

He felt Dean shift to hold him in one hand as he opened the door, and felt him shift again to avoid the numerous boxes piled around their room. He could even hear Dean swear lightly under his breath as he stubbed his toe on one.

 

Eventually, it appeared that Dean had navigated the maze of boxes and made it to the bed, and he set Cas down softly on the soft mattress, crawling across him to curl up and spoon him.”Night, Cas.” 

 

“...Night, Dean.”

 

Tick tock. 

 

Tick tock.

 

Tick tock.

 

There was a bloodcurdling scream from the next room over.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm obviously not ending at 10 chapters. I hope you enjoyed the story to this point! Please let me know if you did with a kudos or comment! They mean the world to me, and I practically live off of them. Have a lovely day!


	11. Settling In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I've got no excuse this time. Field hockey is almost over? I promise I'll post more often. (Watch out for the end of this chapter if you don't like self harm.)

 

Cas shot up from the bed, Dean’s movements mirroring his own perfectly. “Jack?” Fear was clear in his voice. He threw the covers aside, flinging his feet over the edge of the bed and starting to run to the door, feet thumping on the floor solidly. “Jack!”

 

Running down the hall, his heart pounding, he felt his breath catch in his throat as his brain conjured up worst case scenarios for him.  _ Was there anything sharp in the room? Maybe he fell and broke something. They haven’t found Lucifer since before Kelly was murdered, did he break in? No, don’t be silly, the security would have alerted us.  _ Dean’s breathing was also too erratic for a quick sprint through the hall, so Cas knew he was going through the same thought process.

 

He and Dean burst through the door, to find Jack sitting up on his bed, looking as though he was swimming in all of the fluffy blankets and flannel, tears streaming down his cheeks, hands up defensively. He was biting one of his hands in an effort to stop his sobs, but his whole body was shaking. Cas’ heart sank as he took him in. 

 

“Jack?” Timidly, he walked over to the edge of the bed. “Jack? Are you ok…  _ lapin _ ?” He didn’t mean to slip into french, but he wasn’t quite sure how to react. At least Jack’s sobs had lessened slightly. Tentatively, he reached out his hand to rub Jack’s back a little, his eyes widening slightly as Jack leaned into his touch. 

 

Dean crossed over and sat down timidly as well on the other side of the bed, his face filled with worry. “Did something happen?”

 

“I’m sorry!” Jack cried out. “I’m sorry, they all just seemed so real! My mom, and… and…” He shuddered, fear shining through his eyes as they welled up with tears. “He hit me.” The last part was barely a whisper.

 

Cas met Dean’s eyes over Jack’s head, and mouthed,  _ nightmare.  _ “Ok, what do you need us to do, lapin?” He asked Jack calmly, beginning to rub his back slightly. “What can we do to help?” He kept his voice light and his touch even lighter, allowing Jack the option to come closer or to back away.

 

Jack just cuddled a little closer to him. “Stay here please,” he murmured, still shaking all over. “Just until I can sleep, please…”

 

They sat together with Jack until he had calmed down, whispering sweet nothings, and his erratic breathing had returned to a normal rhythm. His eyelids sagged slightly, and then he seemed to drift off and return to a dreamless, more peaceful sleep on Cas’ shoulder. Slowly, Cas eased him back down onto his side, with Dean’s help, before standing up. Grabbing the covers, Cas threw them over Jack, tucking him in. He contemplated kissing his forehead before he and Dean left, deciding not to just yet. Then, looking back at Dean, he motioned to the door with his hands. Dean’s returning nod was accompanied by him walking around the bed to meet Cas.

 

They snuck out, making sure not to close the door too loudly or make the floorboards creak too much. Nothing that would wake Jack. While they did return to their bed, they made sure to keep their door open a crack, just in case any more quiet sobs were to occur.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

The next morning, Jack woke up late, sleeping through the sun peeking through his windows and the birds beginning to sing, which was uncommon for him. However, as soon as Cas’ alarm went off, he shot up like a rocket, in a state of panic.  _ Shit shit shit he’s going to be so mad at me I messed up so badly I don’t have breakfast ready oh please no I don’t want him to be mad, and- _

 

He took in his surroundings, and all of the memories came crashing down on him as one. Last night, his nightmares, Castiel and Dean coming to his room, all of it.  _ You don’t have to be afraid anymore.  _ Even with this thought that he knew to be true, he didn’t feel any safer. 

 

He slipped out of bed, going to his new closet. Everything felt so foreign, the soft green tones lighting the room nothing like those in his old house. He looked through it briefly, finding one of the plain white shirts that Castiel bought for him last night and pulling it out, along with a new pair of jeans. It was strange, they were untorn and free of dirt. There were no beer stains on them, and they didn’t reek of cigarette smoke. 

 

Walking in front of the mirror, he looked at his reflection. His own blue eyes stared back at him, confused as to what he was looking for. All around his left eye were bruises of various sizes and colors, fading slowly. He looked away, shame eating away at him. 

 

Finally turning back to his reflection, Jack looked the rest of himself over. His golden hair was still tousled from sleep, and his flannel sleep shirt was all wrinkled. He looked like a mess. Now came the part he was least excited for. Carefully, so as not to hurt himself, he pulled off his shirt. He was paper thin, most of his ribs showing.  _ The italian we had last night was the most I’ve eaten in… I have no idea how long.  _

 

However, that wasn’t the worst of it. While his stomach and sides sported various bruises bearing resemblance to those on his face, the six faded circular burns covering his left side and hip were far uglier.They weren’t big, all smaller in size than a dime, but Jack hated them more than life itself. He pulled the shirt over his head quickly. 

 

He walked back to his bed before he left the room again. There was a kind of built in bookshelf in his headboard, and, with a small smile, he noticed that Castiel had taken the time to throw some books onto it. Jack turned his head to read the titles. 

 

_ Harry Potter, The Hobbit, City of Bones, The Lord of the Rings.  _

 

All titles that he had found before, whether they be at the local library, or in his very own home.  _ It was nice of Castiel to put this much effort into making me feel at home,  _ he thought, and then,  _ what did I do to deserve this? _

 

He walked away from his bed then, closing the door to his room on the way out and walking down the long hallway slowly. He could smell something cooking in the kitchen, but he couldn’t quite place his finger on it. 

 

As soon as he walked in, he finally pinned down what the smell was. The ingredients laid out only confirmed his suspicions. French toast.  _ But where is it?  _ He wondered, as nobody stood near the stove.   
  
Castiel was actually standing behind Dean with his arms wrapped around him, humming to himself. He wore an apron, and was bright eyed. Dean stood wrapped in a bathrobe, coffee still steaming in his hands as he sipped it slowly. His hair was sticking up everywhere, and the expression on his face was the most disgruntled Jack had ever seen.  _ Well he’s not a morning person.  _

 

Cas looked up when he felt Jack’s eyes watching them. “Oh good morning Jack!” He seemed tentative, and a small smile was creeping at the corners of his lips.  _ Please, don’t be afraid. I don’t bite.  _

 

“Hi.” Jack tried his best to smile back. 

 

“How did you sleep?” Castiel asked him, his hands wringing together, an occurrence that appeared to be a nervous tick of his. 

 

“Very well, thank you.” Jack looked once more to Dean, and then back to Cas.

 

_ God this is so awkward. I’m so awkward. I wish I could tell you how much this means to me. I try to think what I can say, even plan it out in my head, but I can never get it out. I have so many problems and so much baggage and you accepted me so quickly despite them. This is the first time in a long while I can even remember even feeling remotely safe. I really wish with all of my heart that I could tell you just how much that means to me.  _

 

There was a quick  _ ding  _ from the oven then, interrupting Jack’s inner monologue. 

 

“Perfect, the french toast is ready.” Cas smiled wider. “I hope you like it, it’s a family recipe.” 

 

_ That sounds lovely. I can’t wait to try it. Thank you so much. You didn’t have to.  _

 

“Thanks.” 

 

Cas pulled a large casserole dish out of the oven, still steaming. “It’s a cut up baguette, stacked in layers and covered in French toast mix,” Cas explained. “You can cut out a chunk and cover it in syrup as well.” And then, “Gabe used to make it for me when I had nightmares.” 

 

Jack smiled back as politely as he could, accepting the dish and fork that Dean offered him and letting Cas cut out and put some toast on his plate. Drizzling syrup over it, he asked a quiet question. “What will we do today?” 

 

Cas thought about it. “Well, I do remember a certain redhead promising to return to our house at some point, so there’s that…” 

 

Jack smiled slightly, taking his first bite of the french toast casserole. Though it was still hot enough to burn the roof of his mouth, Jack found himself taking another bite. And another. And-

 

“Woah, slow down Tiger.” Dean’s joking voice rang through his ears, the ghost of a smile twitching at the green eyed man’s words. 

 

Jack looked up, eyes widening.  _ Oops.  _ “Sorry,” He whispered, ducking his head back down submissively. He didn’t miss Dean’s concerned frown at Cas. 

 

“You never have to say sorry for eating, Jack.” Casa spoke quietly into the silence. “I’m going to stay here and bake one more thing, why don’t you and Dean go play cards or something?”  _ I don’t know how to play cards. _

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

There was a loud knock at the door around twelve. It was loud and sudden, and Jack nearly jumped out of his skin. _ What the heck!? _

 

“I got it!” Dean stood up from the large sofa, closing his book and putting it down on the table. Cas poked his head out of the kitchen then, apron around his waist. Jack had been smelling baked goods for a while, fragrant and sweet and oh so good, so clearly Cas was almost done with the rest of his morning baking. 

 

Dean noticed Jack’s wide eyes then, letting out a small chuckle. “Sorry kid, the knocker Cas has got on this house is literally insane. I did the same thing the first time someone came to the door, you’ll get used to it.” He unlatched and swung open the door to reveal Charlie. 

 

“Hey Dean-o!” The exuberant redhead embraced him quickly before slipping into Cas’ living room.  _ Our living room? Cas’ living room.  _ “Is that Jack that I see? What is up my dude?” Charlie flashed live long and prosper at him. 

 

Confused, Jack did the same hand motion back to her, eliciting a small laugh. “Please tell me someone has shown this small child Star Trek.”

 

Cas emerged once more, giving Charlie a flower covered hug. “We’ll get on that,” He promised. 

 

Charlie then turned her attention back to Jack, smiling softly. “How was your first night, Jack? Did you sleep well?” Her voice grew quieter. She accepted the chocolate chip cookie Cas passed to her, with a nod of thanks, and continued to smile.

 

_ Should I tell her? Castiel might if I don’t…  _ Jack contemplated silently. “I slept very well, thank you,” He whispered out eventually.  _ I had a nightmare, and I was back with him, and I couldn’t break it, but it’s better now, all better, thanks to Cas. I can’t even describe it to you with words how much this place means to me. Actually, I guess I just did, but I could never tell any of you to your faces, and now that I’ve said it in my head… _

 

“That’s wonderful! Cas has some of the most comfortable bedrooms I’ve ever seen, I’m glad you managed to put another one to good use.” Charlie smiled with relief now, glad to hear the lies pouring from Jack’s mouth about how better everything was now.  _ I’m not that easy to fix.  _ He felt a tightening in his stomach. _ Too late to go back on my word now. _

 

It’s not like he missed Dean’s concerned look at Cas here either. 

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

“Now the most important part is coming up, so I want you to pay attention.” Charlie was leaned forward on her seat in anticipation, another cookie in hand. The lights were off, and the shades were drawn, allowing the participants to immerse themselves fully into the motion picture being shown.

 

“ _ Space, the final frontier…”  _ The narrator’s deep voice began, echoing slightly throughout the room. 

  
“What are you talking about, they do this in literally every movie!” Dean exclaimed from his position cuddled next to Cas. 

 

“Shh!” Charlie beat on him with the pillow next to her. “It’s iconic! Don’t ruin the movie experience for Jack!” 

 

“Ahh! I repent, I repent! Cas, protect me!” Dean buried his face deeper into the crook of Cas’ neck, hiding from Charlie.  _ They’re adorable,  _ Jack thought with a sad smile.  _ So full of life, so ready to tackle any challenge they need to together. I wish I could feel the way they did. _

 

By the time the movie was halfway through, Cas had fallen asleep, curled around Dean lovingly. Dean wasn’t quite knocked out yet, though his breathing was getting heavier, and his eyelids were sagging. Charlie seemed to be the only one of the four of them actively engaged in the movie.

 

Jack snuggled a little deeper into the couch as he felt his eyes begin to sag more and more as well, mirroring Dean’s. 

 

He awoke to bright lights and loud voices. _ Where am I? What have I done wrong?  _  “I can’t believe you all fell asleep during Star Trek!” Charlie exclaimed unhappily, dipping a cookie in milk now. Jack looked around, heart racing. Dean and Cas looked just as blurry eyed and asleep as he did, blinking slowly. She turned and seemed to notice Jack for the first time. A stab of fear went straight through his heart as he awaited her next words.  “Not you, sweetie,” Her voice was quieter, and she smiled at him. “You must have been tired after last night. It’s understandable.” 

 

There was that feeling again, that feeling of fear.  _ So Castiel did tell her.  _

 

“However… you two have no excuse!” Charlie frowned as she turned back to Dean and Cas once more.  _ Uh oh. _

 

Cas scratched the back of his head sheepishly. 

 

“It’s not my fault!” Dean blurted out. 

 

“Oh?” There was a mirthful look in Charlie’s eyes now. Jack wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.

 

“Cas is just so warm.” Dean smiled softly, before clearing his throat and sticking by his defense. “I can’t stay awake, he’s like a little furnace. A little snoring furnace.”

 

Behind him, Cas was blushing a brilliant shade of red. 

 

Charlie looked between the two boys, then finally cracked a real grin. “You made me cookies, so I’ll forgive you.” Jack allowed himself to breathe. No one was getting hurt.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Before they knew it, Charlie had to leave. Something that had to do with her work was going on, and she had to be over there “asap.” Quickly, she bid them goodbyes and gave Cas a quick hug, then fled out the door, red hair bouncing behind her.

 

Jack had left Cas and Dean on the sofa again, curled up, in favor of heading back to his room for some “alone time,” as he had explained very quietly. He walked slowly down the long hallway, hearing his own footsteps creak on the wood, listening to the birds he could hear chirping outside.  _ So carefree, so in charge of their life. I’d do anything to get that control back.  _ Jack walked wistfully into his room, and from there to the small bathroom on the side. He could hear the birds even clearer now, there was a wide window near the sink that he could even see a few from. 

 

Dean and Cas had left him some soap, a washcloth, two fluffy towels, shampoo and conditioner, and a small razor for shaving. 

 

_ What if I could take control back?  _

 

The voice was but a small nagging thought in the back of Jack’s head, whispering in his ear. He paused. 

 

_ I can help you, you want this. Right, Jack? Take control. Do it. _

 

Jack knew this wasn’t the right way to do things. Half of his mind wanted to cry out for Cas, half for his mother. 

 

_ They don’t really love you, they love her, and she’s dead. She’s dead and it’s all your fault.  _

 

He could begin to feel tears prick in the corners of his eyes. This was wrong, but nothing else felt right, so how was this any different, right? 

 

_ That’s right. Do it.  _

 

His hand shaking slightly, he began to reach for the razor. 

 

_ You never loved your body anyway, what’s one more scar among the thousands that already litter your body? You’re a wreck of a person, Jack Kline, now just do it! _

 

His fingers were now clasped tight around the razor, so tightly that his knuckles appeared white. 

 

_ Do it. _

 

_ Do it.  _

 

_ Do it! _

 

Jack screwed his eyes shut and pressed the razor blade against his skin.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to leave you on another cliffhanger. See you in a bit!


	12. Yes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This day celebrates one year of me uploading trash on the internet! Enjoy this little present, I've been working on it all month.
> 
> (BTW: There is a small cameo from both Dan and and Phil in this chapter. It was just easier because I was currently writing something with them in it at the time. All of their rights belong to them. :D)

 

_ This is what you want, Jack, this is good for you.  _

 

He could feel the cold kiss of the metal against his pale skin. Blood began to well up around the edges of the cut, warm and wine red and metallic. It was accompanied with a stinging sensation that grounded Jack like nothing ever had before. 

 

He could feel himself take the blade up once more, ready to slice away the pain, when he heard it. 

 

“Jack?”

 

The moment Cas’ voice broke the silence, Jack felt a horrible sense of disgust wash over himself.  _ What am I doing?  _ The voice had died down to almost nothing, a mere whisper in the back of his mind. 

 

Disgust filling his head as bile filled his mouth, Jack stumbled back from the counter, horrified. The razor fell to the green tiled floor with a sharp clang as he backed up even further from the sink. 

 

His heart pounding in his ears, Jack slowly picked up the razor, turning the faucet on cold and running it underneath the water. “I’m in here,” He called out to Cas, flinching slightly at the inflection of his voice. It sounded shaky, and there was a small crack right in the middle of it. “In the bathroom.”

 

Cas didn’t seem to notice. “Come join me and Dean when you’re done, okay? We need to get a handle on our Halloween plans.” There was an awkward shuffling sound that sounded like Cas hovering outside of Jack’s door uncertainty, and then the slight creaking that signified Cas was walking back down the long hallway. Jack let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in. 

 

With shaking fingers, he dried off the razor and slipped it down to the very bottom drawer under the sink. He wouldn’t be touching that again anytime soon. He quickly rinsed his arm as well, hissing slightly at the stinging sensation of the cold water hitting the open cut. 

 

He applied minimal pressure to his arm until it seemed the cut had clotted, though the pale skin around the cut was puckered and red. Thinking it through, he slipped on the brown jacket Cas had bought him. 

 

Giving himself a once over in the mirror to check that his eyes weren’t red and you couldn’t see any of his left forearm, he allowed an almost pleasant smile to overtake his face.  _ I just hope it’s convincing enough.  _

 

As soon as he hit the top of the stairs at the end of the long hallway, he could hear deep voices. Dean and Cas were speaking, and they sounded agitated. 

 

“But Cas, Mom wants to meet Jack. We could introduce them on Halloween first, since we’re trick or treating over there anyway. I’m sure that it would be completely fine if-”

 

“Dean, you know she had told us things are bad right now. We can’t throw that on them” Cas’ voice spoke over Dean’s. Jack could almost see the frown on his face, though he stayed out of sight, behind the banister. “She and John have therapy from one to three. And do you even know if Jack wants to go trick or treating in the first place?”

 

There was a small mumble from Dean, and a sigh from Cas.

 

“Did you try Bobby?” Dean sounded hopeful.

 

“He and Crowley are away on vacation in London. Didn’t you see the pictures?” Cas spoke softly, disappointingly, before leaning in for a kiss. As he pulled away, Jack could hear him speak again. “It’s okay, Dean.”

 

“”What about Charlie then, Cas?” Dean sounded desperate, ignoring Cas’ last words completely. “The kid seems pretty attached to her, maybe she could take him for the day?” 

 

“I tried already, apparently, there’s a massive D&D group thing going on then that she’s been preparing for for months. We can’t just throw him at her.” There was a pause, in which Cas seemed to be contemplating something. “Did you ask Sam?”

 

“He’s apparently taking a day to ride down to Philly, to talk at some law school about the benefits of some strange thingy to do with law and- Cas, you know what I mean.” Dean seemed to deflate, the fight leaving him. “Wait a minute, did you check with Gabe yet?”

 

Cas shuffled uncomfortably. “I wasn’t sure, since he’s so exuberant... Would he really be the best thing for Jack right now?” 

 

“Oh.” Dean paused. “I didn’t think of that.” 

 

“How about this. If we can’t think of any other options, I’ll ask Gabe.”

 

“Deal.” 

 

Jack looked down at his feet before leaning out a little further around the banister, careful not to make any noise or move too suddenly, and looked back up, meeting Dean’s amused green eyes. 

 

“Hey, Jack. Didn’t hear you come down.”

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Cas and Dean sat together on the white sofa, Cas’ legs in Dean’s lap. Jack sat across from them in the softest armchair Dean had ever seen. He couldn’t really blame Jack for choosing that spot, he too had become enamored at first with the odd piece of furniture. 

 

Finally, after the longest possible silence, Jack spoke. “Were you trying to get rid of me?” It was tentative, and even quieter than the first time Dean had heard the kid speak. His heart broke as he followed Jack’s downcast eyes all the way to the floor. 

 

“Why would you even think that,  _ lapin _ ?” Cas frowned a little. 

 

Jack just shrugged and played with the cuff of his left jacket sleeve.

 

“Of course we weren’t trying to get rid of you!” Cas seemed upset that Jack would even insinuate such a fact. While Dean loved his passionate fits of emotion, raised voies was not what Jack needed right now.  _ Maybe Cas was right about Gabe…  _ He put his arm on Cas’ kneecap, looking up into his boyfriend’s bright blue eyes.Crystal clarity flashed between the two of them for a moment, and then Cas continued, his voice at a more acceptable volume.

 

“We were simply trying to plan… well, you see,” Cas smiled. “Two days after Halloween, the second of November, is our anniversary, me and Dean, and we just wanted to do something special, that’s all.” Then he seemed to catch himself. “Not that you’re not special! Just… we wanted to do something just the two of us.” 

 

“Oh.” Understanding clear on Jack’s face, he seemed to visibly calm down. “What are you two planning on doing?” 

 

“That, my dear  _ lapin,  _ is a surprise for Dean.” Cas smirked, blowing a kiss at Dean as he spoke. 

 

Dean stuck out his tongue. “Of course it is.” Finally, he turned back to Jack, who had a kind of wistful look on his face. He felt his heart leap into his throat as he put himself in Jack’s position. He padded down the hall, and decided to listen in to his new foster parents’ conversation. It would switch to him, discussing places to stash him, as though he was being thrown away again, as though they didn’t want him.  _ That could have been me.  _ The thought was sudden, and it hurt, almost as if he had been smacked.  _ If Mom hadn’t put her foot down for the first time, I could have been the one looking for a family.  _

 

“Dean?” Cas was shaking his shoulder lightly. 

 

“Huh?” Dean blinked, the fog of the memory leaving his emerald eyes.    
  
Cas let out an endearing chuckle. “I was just asking Jack if he wanted to head out today and go costume shopping. For Halloween.”

 

“I haven’t trick or treated since I was five,” Jack whispered, subconsciously pulling his sleeve down again, the ghost of a sad smile tugging at the edge of his lips.

 

“Well, if there’s one thing I know about trick or treating, it’s that you need a costume.” Dean flashed a blindingly white smile, seeing Jack’s face light up. “What do you say about some shopping, kid?”

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

As soon as the three of them stepped into  _ Creep it Real _ , Jack’s eyes widened with shock. The whole place was decked out in purple, orange, and black. Costumes hung on racks that seemed to go on for miles. There were walls and walls of makeup, and candy by the pound. Different decorations of all shapes and sizes were strewn about the whole store, under  _ Buy one get one Free  _ and  _ Twenty Percent off  _ signs.

 

“What is this place?” Jack whispered, in awe.

 

Cas smirked. He had done the same thing when he had first set foot in the store. “High end Halloween store. My father used to leave me and my siblings here every year to pick out our costumes. They have pretty much every Halloween item you could ever want.” 

 

“Wow,” Jack breathed out. 

 

Suddenly, a tall man with glasses, a black quiff, and the palest skin Cas had ever seen walked up to them. Like the rest of the store employees, he wore a Halloween themed outfit, a black leather jacket, ripped black jeans, tall boots, and a shirt with the words, ‘I’m a real pain in the neck!’ written across them. His nametag read Phil.

 

“Welcome to Creep it Real, my name is Phil and today I’ll be your assistant. How may I help you?” The man smiled good naturedly, and Cas was surprised to find that he had small pointy canines. He spoke with a refined British accent, and his tone was pleasant, though his eyes betrayed his fatigue. It was the Halloween season, so Cas wasn’t surprised. 

 

“I preordered something last week, under the name ‘Novak,’” Cas stated, though his tone was questioning. 

 

Phil nodded knowingly. “Follow me to the register, I’ll ring you up.” He had already turned around and started walking to the register, rubbing his eyes when Cas realized that they still didn’t have a costume for Jack. 

 

“Oh, um…” Cas stumbled over his words slightly, making a small gesture back to Jack as he did. 

 

“Oh!” Phil slapped his forehead. “Did you want to purchase anything else or require any other assistance before I ring you up?” The words themselves sounded boring, recorded even, though he still managed to give them life.  _ He must be naturally good with people,  _ Cas decided.  _ I’ll give him a good review on their customer survey.  _

 

“Yeah, the kid needs a costume.” Dean smiled at him politely.

 

Cas saw Phil’s eyes light up at this as he looked Jack up and down excitedly. Suddenly, the sole focus of this british man’s attention was Jack, and he shuffled awkwardly under his scrutinization. 

 

“Well then…” Phil trailed off, realizing he didn’t have a name to call Jack.

 

“Jack,” Cas supplied, as Jack himself was looking a little bit like a deer caught in headlights. 

 

“Well then, Jack, what kind of costume did you have in mind?” Phil took the whole thing in stride, probably having dealt with a number of awkward customers in the past. Ẅhen Jack didn’t respond immediately, he just smiled softly. “Come with me, I’m sure we’ll find something you like.” 

 

As they walked down the aisles of the store, Jack’s eyes grew and grew, beginning to look like saucers. 

 

Phil stopped in front of some of the scarier costumes briefly, quickly assessing Jack’s reaction and shaking his head, moving on. He did the same with a variety of comical costumes, and even briefly contemplated a risque one, before making a face reminding Cas of the time he saw Dean try to stick a whole lemon slice in his mouth.

 

Near the back of the store, Jack stopped on his own, staring at a large rack of brightly colored costumes. 

 

“Those are our Disney onesies, they’re actually quite popular.” Phil explained to them happily. “We have many full body costumes here, but these are by far the comfiest and easiest to wear.” 

 

Jack walked over as if in a trance, slowly pulling out a light blue one.

 

“That’s Stitch.” Phil chuckled as though there was an inside joke associated with Stitch. “Ohana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind.” he spoke out, in a crude (though strangely accurate) imitation of Stitch’s voice. 

 

Cas could hear Dean let out a small chuckle from behind him, deep and rumbling. 

 

“Want to try it on?” Phil was enthusiastic, beginning to shephard Jack to the changing rooms in the back already. Jack followed him, shooting one last alarmed look back at Cas and Dean before finally just being dragged away. 

 

Cas glanced over at Dean, who was looking him dead in the eye and smirking.

 

“So, it would seem we’ll have some free time after this. What do you want to-” Dean started, checking his watch, only to be interested by Cas.

 

“Silly Dean, we have to decorate the entire house!” Cas smirked. “There’s no time for anything else!” He bopped Dean on the nose, giggling at the way he saw Dean’s nose scrunch up. Carefully, he stepped back and threaded their fingers together. “We’ll discuss  _ that  _ later.”

 

Phil and Jack reappeared a few moments later. “Follow me, I’ll ring you up up front.” Phil smiled. 

 

Jack was carrying the blue onesie under one arm and sporting a huge smile, one of the most genuine Cas had seen in a while. 

 

Phil made quick work of the items, quickly scanning the tag on the inside, and then ducking under the register and pulling out an opaque bag, scanning the label on that too. The price rang up, and Dean flashed a glance at the small calculator for a moment.  _ Yikes. Costumes are more expensive than I remember. _

 

Cas passed over his credit card. 

 

“Your total is 135.60,” Phil clarified, grabbing their receipt, placing it with the costumes in an even larger bag and passing it over the counter. He gave them one last smile. “Have a lovely day.”

 

As he passed their bags over, Cas took them, eyes flicking to whatever discoloration seemingly appeared on his right hand. Written in dark black letters along his ring finger was the name  _ Daniel.  _ Cas smiled to himself as he noted the golden ring that accompanied the name.

 

They left the shop with their purchases, and a final wave to Phil, who seemed to have acquired some sort of coffee via a very affectionate blonde coworker. Dean swung the bag slightly on his arm as he walked, humming.

 

Cas shivered, pulling his trenchcoat slightly closer to himself as the strong wind seemed to barrage them. When they finally made it to the car, he opened the door, sliding in as quickly as possible and slamming it shut. Dean and Jack did the same. 

 

“You know what I think, guys?” Dean spoke up suddenly. 

 

“Hmm?” Cas murmured, looking over to him, trying not to let the blatant adoration he held for this man show too much in his eyes. 

 

“I think we definitely deserve some hot chocolate when we get back home,” Dean hinted, the ghost of a mirthful smile tugging at the edge of his lips.

 

“I think that can be arranged.” Cas leaned over and pecked him quickly on the lips before starting the car. Dean knew he was a sucker for hot chocolate. 

 

They pulled into the driveway, unloaded the car, and entered the quiet house. Cas made quick work of the kitchen, both pointing out and grabbing ingredients, moving in perfect sync with Dean as he did. When they had set up all of the necessary baking utilities, (there weren’t many) he turned to Jack. “Have you ever made hot chocolate like this before, Jack?” He asked him. 

 

Jack shook his head slowly. “We usually microwaved water and put in a packet.”

 

“Well let me tell you, kiddo, it is so much better on the stove.” Dean grinned. “Here, can you help me by filling this pot with water?” He handed the small pot to Jack carefully, watching as his face brightened a little and he cracked a small smile. 

 

Dean then turned to Cas. “Hey, I’m gonna go grab some of the decorations, can you watch the kid while I do?”

 

“Yeah sure, you know they’re in-”

 

“Our bedroom closet, under the Christmas decorations and behind the Thanksgiving decorations,” Dean finished for him. “Don’t worry, Sunshine, I know.” He pecked Cas’ forehead affectionately before heading out of the kitchen. If he remembered this correctly, there were going to be multiple trips needed.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Dean opened the door to their room slowly, hearing the light pine wood creak slightly as it swung forward. He smiled to himself, making his way over to Cas’ bedside table.  _ Cas is one of those strange people who locks his closets, _ Dean thought to himself.  _ If I remember correctly, the key should be in here.  _   
  
He opened the drawer, pushing aside a couple unnamable things, as well as a small novel Cas had been reading and a pencil. “Huh, it’s not in here,” Dean frowned as he spoke, just as his hand made contact with a small, velvet covered box. Dean could feel his heart jump into his throat. 

 

It was like everything around him had frozen. He could remember the first time he had asked Cas about marriage.

 

_ “Have you ever thought of marriage?” The question started Castiel, and he jumped. _ __  
__  
_ “What?” _ __  
_  
_ __ Dean repeated himself. “Have you ever thought of marriage?” As he asked, he traced the name on Cas’ forearm, the winding curves of the four cursive letters.

_  
_ _ Cas felt his breath hitch. “Occasionally.” He tried and failed to sound nonchalant, the ring in his pocket growing heavier. He still carried it everywhere he went, despite him having no idea when he was going to give it to Dean. _

 

He knew marriage was a formality in their society, nothing more than a glorified performance put out to boast to others. He knew the only marriage certificate you needed was your own skin. He knew their anniversary was coming up and he and Cas had waited too long already. None of these thoughts stopped the jolt of pure joy that little box sent through his body. 

 

It was then, of course, that he spotted the key, resting on top of the dresser. 

 

_ Put the box back. Don’t open it. Slowly close the drawer. Cas will show you when he’s ready. _

 

Dean did as his rational side instructed, despite every thought in his head screaming the opposite. With limbs heavier than lead, he slogged to the closet, opening it slowly with the bronze skeleton key. He felt himself move aside boxes, identifying the orange and black one easily and beginning to lug it downstairs. None of that mattered. His mind was going a million miles an hour.

 

He set the box down slowly at the bottom of the steps, going to meet his boyfriend,  _ but not for much longer,  _ in the kitchen, and seeing Cas’ beautiful blue eyes to flick up and meet his own. An innocent smile played at the corner of his lips.  _ He has no idea how easily he just shattered my world. _

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

Jack’s head shot up from what he was doing, excited. “Castiel told me you enjoyed your hot chocolate with whipped cream!” He exclaimed. “He helped me put it on,” Jack offered the small mug to Dean with a tentative smile.

 

Dean just stared at the offending cup of coco as if it had slapped him.

 

_ “What is it Dean?” Cas sat, looking at him, slightly confused, which only made Dean’s grin grow wider. Cas was sporting the cutest whipped cream mustache he had ever seen. _ __  
__  
_ “You have a little something…” Dean trailed off, and then suddenly, with a burst of confidence he didn’t even know he possessed, pushing himself closer to Cas across the table, smudged Cas’ lips with his finger, wiping the whipped cream away. _ __  
_  
_ __ “Dean…” Cas whispered to him, staring with deep blue eyes. You could go swimming in those eyes, and Dean almost couldn’t tear himself away. Slowly then, he watched as Cas closed them, leaning in, as Dean did the same.

 

“Hello, Earth to Dean.” 

 

Dean blinked suddenly. Cas was still in front of him, though this time, his lips were only parted into a smirk. “Zoned out a little bit there, you okay?” Jack peeked out from behind his shoulder, face only slightly furrowed in concern. 

 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, I’m okay, thanks a ton, Jack.” Dean smiled as genuinely as he could, finally  accepting the steaming cup from the teenager. “I brought down the first load of stuff, there only appear to be two more boxes in the closet,” he informed Cas with a small smirk. “Hoarder.”

 

“Yeah, I can never let anything go, no matter how broken it is…” Cas said wistfully. “C’mon, I’ll help you lug down my other two bins of spooky stuff. I’m afraid they might be a two person job.” 

 

Cas took one last wistful sip of his hot chocolate before setting it back onto the table and standing up.  _ Oh well, it’s not like I won’t be able to have more of that in a few days,  _ he thought with a smile. 

 

Cas was right, it had taken both him and Dean to lug just one of the other large boxes down the stairs, and while Dean insisted on dragging the third along himself, it was clear that his muscles were straining with the effort. 

 

“Okay, so what are we putting up first?” Dean questioned, ripping the top off of one of the boxes. 

 

“Garlands!” Cas exclaimed, excitedly wrenching the purple and orange decorations from the box with a flourish.  _  They look like caterpillars. _

 

“And then?”

 

“Lights!” There were indoor and outdoor lights, all of them a spooky shade of orange.

 

“And then?” 

 

“Scented candles!” Cas grinned. “Not gonna yank those out though, that’s the entire third box.” He motioned to the untouched, slightly smaller box behind the first two.

 

Jack opened that box as he spoke, and Cas could see his eyes visibly widen. “How many scented candles do you own?” He asked, a little bit of fear in his voice as he picked one up.

 

Dean moved to stand next to him, his jaw dropping as well. He reached in and pulled out a speckled orange one. “More importantly, how many pumpkin spice candles do you own?” 

 

Cas let out an awkward chuckle. “Tis the season. I just don’t think we’ll be able to use all the decorations this year… everyone’s moved out.”

  
“We don’t have to use all of the decorations,” Dean reminded him, putting a consoling hand on Cas’ shoulder. 

 

“I know, but still.” Cas smiled a sad smile. “Let’s just get to work.”

 

Jack put his candle down slowly, trading it for a long garland. He moved to the railing on the staircase where he had hesitated only hours earlier, and began to hang it, smiling to himself.

 

They all set to work, hanging garlands everywhere, stopping only when Jack halted to share a bright idea with them. “We should wrap the garlands in some of the lights. That way, we’ll have less stuff unused this year.”

 

Cas’ face visibly brightened, excited at the prospect of the huge house seeming less abandoned.

 

Dean began to unwrap different decorations  now, metal pumpkins and candles the size of his head. He tried to artfully arrange them as best he could, all the while, his brain focused on other matters. 

 

Decorating the house took about an hour, and by the time that they were done, Dean and Jack were exhausted. “I had no idea you had so much… house.” Dean was at a loss for words. “I’m going to need a map to navigate this.” 

 

Cas just smirked slightly and checked the time. “I have ‘work’ in thirty minutes, babe. Are you okay with…” He trailed off, still uncertain about how Dean felt about his work. Jack’s shoulders stiffened. 

 

Dean just smiled warmly at him, leaning over to peck him on the cheek. “Of course,” Then he paused. “Wait a sec, it’s only eight. Did your shift get moved?” 

 

“Oh, I moved it so I could be back sooner. Tomorrow night is trick or treat after all.” Cas smiled. “And I assume that some people will still want to see me after it’s over. He heard Dean’s sharp intake of breath. 

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

-Halloween-

 

It was five forty five, and Jack was struggling with the zipper on the back of the onsie. As far as he reached, he just couldn’t manage to zip up the last five inches or so. He could feel himself starting to get worked up, but there was no way that he was going downstairs to ask for help, not with his back exposed like that. He contorted his body further, striving to reach that small, cold piece of metal, which had lodged itself firmly near the center of his back. 

 

With one final grunt, sounding more like a whimper, Jack felt his hands close on the elusive zipper. He yanked it as hard as he could, praying it wouldn’t fall off. Luckily, with a satisfying zipping sound, the entire back of his costume closed up. 

 

He breathed a sigh of relief, flopping down on the bed, exasperated.

 

Checking the time, Jack grumbled something else, sounding more like a curse than anything else, and rolled off again. He made his way down the stairs, coming to a stop at the bottom and observing the domestic scene before him.

 

Cas stood, arms out in front of Dean. As opposed to his usual beige trench coat, a black one now adorned his frame. Dean was crouched in front of him, using a lint roller all over the coat, a deerstalker perched on his head and a blue scarf around his neck. 

 

Dean turned around when Jack reached the bottom of the stairs, and Cas looked up from staring into Dean’s eyes. 

 

Cas immediately let out what could only be explained as a squeal. “Oh you look adorable!” He exclaimed, “Dean, where’s the camera?” He all but snatched the deerstalker from Dean’s head and the scarf from his neck, and ran past him to get to Jack as he put them on. 

 

And thus, the Halloween picture taking commenced, under the old willow tree in Cas’ backyard. Jack could feel himself begin to smile against his own will as Cas bounced around with a child-like joy.  _ Who’s to say that there’s an age limit on the fun of tonight? _

 

Dean took about twenty different pictures, and finally a selfie of the three of them. This was when Jack finally got the courage to ask him and Cas what their costumes were. 

 

“Oh! I’m Sherlock, and he’s Doctor Watson,” Cas explained with a smile. “We’ll have to get you watching!”

 

The clock struck six o’clock, and it was like a spell. Out of every house poured children and teens of all shapes and sizes, all of them bouncing around with just as much excitement as Cas. 

 

Jack stared at them for a moment in shock, before Cas handed him a pillowcase. “We take Halloween Trick or Treat very seriously in my neighborhood,” Cas explained. “Now come on, we only have two hours!”

 

In those two hours, Jack stopped by more houses than he had ever seen in his life, each more decorated than the last. Once or twice, he heard Cas tut something like, “Tacky,” or, “Overkill.”  _ Cas’ house is the most subtly decorated house in this entire neighborhood,  _ Jack thought with a small smile. 

 

Cas seemed to know everyone, no matter their ages. He knew the old man handing out jumbo sized candy bars, and the young woman with nothing but bubblegum in her candy basket. He always smiled politely, and made pleasant conversation for a few moments, complimented their houses, and it was off to the next door.

 

They trick or treated in John and Mary’s neighborhood as well, and it was Dean’s turn to exchange pleasantries, Dean’s turn to laugh and compliment other’s houses. Everything here seemed realer, in a way. The tension was clear in the air, and people wore their hearts on their sleeves. 

 

Dean’s mother seemed quite nice, though quite stressed out. Jack almost wished that she had stayed, since the phone call she had taken mere moments before leaving seemed to nearly leave her in tears. _ She would have been happier if she stayed.  _

 

They began walking back to their neighborhood after Mary left, as there was no point in staying in this unfamiliar place. 

 

Nearing the end of the night, it was quite clear that the three of them were getting tired. “Come on, just one more house,” Cas smiled to Jack as they all made the way up the steps to the large, well landscaped house at the edge of the neighborhood. Cas checked his watch. “We should get going after this anyway, it’s almost eight.” 

 

Jack rang the doorbell this time, and took a slightly self conscious step back. He could hear some rustling from inside, and then a shadow passed in front of the frosted glass of their front door. 

 

A young man with curly brown hair opened the door, still chatting with someone out of sight as he did, an orange bowl in his left hand. 

 

“Trick or treat,” Jack said softly, looking into the man’s chocolate brown eyes, fear almost prominent. This man was tall, about six foot three if he had to guess, and he reminded Jack of sleepless nights and tall shadows cast outside his room door. 

 

Then the man’s face split into a huge grin, and he began to coo softly. “Aren’t you just the sweetest!” Jack was surprised to find that this man had a british accent as well. “Phil, come see this one!”

 

The other shadow behind the door moved then, and the employee from  _ Creep it Real  _ was poking his head around the frame. “Jack!” He exclaimed with another of his blinding smiles. 

 

Jack blinked, surprised that this man remembered him. “Hi.”

 

“This is my husband, Dan.” Phil smiled as he began to chat good naturedly with Jack. “You remember me talking to you about him?” 

 

Jack let out a tentative smile and nod in response. 

 

Cas waved when Phil acknowledged him, but kept back off to the side with Dean, watching Jack speak softly with these men. 

 

“I didn’t know they lived here,” Dean murmured in Cas’ ear. 

 

Cas just smiled a little bit. “Me neither,” he confessed, “They must have moved here more recently than I thought.”

 

Their whispered conversation was cut short as he heard Dan state, “Well, it is the end of the night, and I doubt any more trick or treaters are going to come through…” he seemed to pause for a moment before stating with a sort of finality, “Hold out your bag,” to Jack. 

 

Jack complied, confused, though his eyes widened as Dan simply dumped the rest of his bucket into Jack’s bag. 

 

“Oh,” Jack seemed to whisper, much to Dan and Phil’s enjoyment. “I can’t take all of this from you guys.”

 

“Trust me, we need to get rid of it anyways.” Dan leaned in, almost as if telling a secret, and Cas could see the tattoo on the side of his neck in the porch light. “We haven’t exactly celebrated like this in London in a long time, and Phil may have gone a tad overboard with the candy.”

 

“Hey!” Phil complained. “I heard that trick or treating was a much bigger deal in America, that’s all! I expected more kids…”

 

Jack looked down self consciously, and Dan put his hand on his shoulder comfortingly. “Hey, don’t worry,” he said softly, “I trick or treated until I was sixteen.”

 

They said their goodnights to the nice british couple, and left for home. Cas interlaced his fingers with Dean’s, giving him a light kiss on the cheek as he did.

 

~•~•~•~•~

 

-November 2nd-

 

Cas woke up just before eleven, sliding out of bed as quietly as he could. He padded into the kitchen, silently thanking every higher power that he could think of that Dean liked to sleep late, and began to prepare breakfast. He turned on their gas stove, watching the purple fire crackle into existence. He placed their nicest frying pan on the stove, and got started cracking some eggs. 

 

Everything had been prepared. Jack would be dropped off at Gabe’s later, even though Cas was a tad skeptical about that situation, and everything about their day had been carefully planned out in advance.

 

One of Dean’s favorite foods were omelettes, and he liked them with lots of bacon and cheese, as well as a few different vegetables now that Cas had introduced him to. 

 

Carefully, Cas flipped the omelette onto a seperate plate and added the final touch, a light sprinkling of chives across the top of the meal. 

 

It was a couple more minutes before Cas could hear the sounds of Dean stirring from their room. It wasn’t much longer after that when Cas could see Dean as he rounded the corner of the staircase, rubbing his eyes and yawning. “Morning, babe,” Dean managed to get out, before Cas tackled him in a hug. 

 

“Happy anniversary!” Cas tightened his arms around Dean’s waist, giving him a solid kiss on the lips as he did. 

 

Dean chuckled slightly, his hands sliding to Cas’ waist as he did. “Happy anniversary, sunshine.” Then he noticed the breakfast Cas had laid out. “Is that-?”

 

“Breakfast?” Cas offered. 

 

They sat down together, quietly. 

 

“Where’s Jack?” Dean finally asked. “Usually I’m the last one up.” 

 

Cas just let out a small chuckle at that and began to cut open his own omelette. “I believe that he’s still gorging himself on Halloween candy. Was it a mistake to let him keep it in his room?”

 

“Probably.” Dean took the first bite of his omelette, his eyes closing as he did. “Oh God, Cas, this is amazing.”

 

Even after a year, Cas couldn’t help but blush. He bit into his breakfast to avoid saying anything that he would regret, casting his eyes down towards the plate. Finally, he swallowed, looking back to Dean. “Thank you.”

 

His soulmate simply let out a small chuckle. “So, Cas, what amazing plans do you have in store for me today?”

 

“Oh, just you wait and see.” There was a mirthful look in Cas’ eyes. 

 

Jack emerged from his room a little later, and the three of them finished up their wonderful breakfast, even though Cas had forgotten to make Jack an omelette. (He felt terrible, and whipped one up for him as quickly as possible.)

 

Around five, Cas stood in his room, nothing but black pants on, looking himself over nervously. He had no idea what to wear. Aimlessly, he drifted to his bedside table, pulling the small box from it and setting it on his bed. Looking back to his reflection, he was brought back to another worry-filled day in front of his mirror.

_ “Anna, unless you’re going to help-“ Then Cas’ eyes widened, and he whirled around to face her. “You can help! Quick, which do you think he’ll like better? White or blue?” He held up two shirts for her to see desperately, one as pale as his face, the other a deep navy blue. _

_ Anna simply chuckled and rolled her eyes at his antics, those of a child with a crush. “White. Your tie is already blue.” She looked him over as he moved to slip a beige coat off of its hanger. “Really? You’re going for the tax accountant look? _

_ “I like the coat. Dean got it for me.” Cas pouted a little, defensive. _

Smiling softly at the memory, Cas went to his closet and pulled out the silken shirt, royal blue tie, and worn trench coat. His hands traced appreciatively over it before beginning to dress. The tie felt alien in his hands, and he fumbled with it as he did.  _ Come on, you just have to tie the knot,  _ his brain helpfully supplied, bringing Cas’ thoughts back once more to the little black box by bed, and he felt another kind of knot begin to tighten in his stomach. 

A quick check to make sure his hair was in order.

Finally, he shrugged on the well loved jacket, slipping the little black box containing the source of his nervousness into his pocket, buttoning it closed as if that would make his anxiety disappear. Opening the door, he heard himself call out, “All yours!” to Dean, sounding abnormally normal.

Dean barely took half as long as Cas did, though he came out wearing his leather jacket over an olive green shirt that made his eyes pop, and Cas felt his throat go dry. 

Dean walked slowly over to Cas, the ghost of a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Hey, Sunshine. Looking spiffy.” 

“I would say the same.” Cas held in an elated giggle that threatened to break through. He settled for the biggest smile he could possibly have. “Come on, let’s grab Jack and head out.”

Jack came bounding down the stairs at the first call from Cas, looking slightly guilty and holding the fourth Harry Potter under his arm. “I’m ready to go,” he stated, standing up straight. 

Dean chuckled, a light blush scattered amongst his freckles.  _ Like stars in the sky… _

The ride to Gabe and Sammy’s new place wasn’t long, though Cas swore if his heart beat any faster, it might jump out of his chest. They pulled into the gravelly driveway, the car coming to a halt right behind Gabe’s, a baby blue volkswagon bug that Gabe liked to drive everywhere, despite Sam’s protests of long legs. 

As soon as they rang the doorbell, Gabe was there, excitement practictically oozing from his pores. “You must be Jack!” He exclaimed. Cas winced as Jack seemed to visibly recoil from the smaller, exuberant man.  _ Oh boy. _

“You two lovebirds don’t have to worry about a thing, I’ve got a handle on this,” Gabe pulled Jack into an awkward hug. “You’re so sweet, like a little gumdrop.” Then he gasped overdramatically. “That’s what I’ll call you!”

Sam came to the door then, luckily for Jack. “Okay Gabe, don’t give the poor boy a heart attack.” He gently pried Gabe off of Jack, opting to hold out his hand to shake instead. “My name is Sam. It’s nice to meet you. Dean has told me a lot about you.

Jack shook his hand, and cracked a tentative smile. 

As soon as Jack was situated, they were off again, sliding into Cas’ car once more.

“So will you finally tell me where we’re going?” Dean joked as they pulled onto a street in the town. 

“Don’t have to tell you anymore, we’re here.” Cas smiled warmly as he pulled into a parking space, opening the door to feed the meter from a roll of quarters. 

Dean climbed out of his half of the car as well, taking his time, coming almost face to face with Cas as he stood to his full height. He leaned down and gave his sunshine a small kiss on the lips, causing Cas to break out in small giggles. 

“Come on, follow me.” Cas laced their fingers together, and the two of them began to walk down the street, their breaths prominent in the frosty December air. “I figured maybe we could walk around for a little bit first, you know, see the sights, smile at the strangers, do the things…” 

Dean looked to him with wide eyes. “You remembered?” He whispered quietly.

_ “Where are we actually going to eat?” Cas sounded tentative as he asked, not wanting to overstep his boundaries, but his stomach was rumbling. _

_ “Oh shoot.” Dean muttered. Since they had left the bar, they had just been wandering around in the middle of the town, looking at all the christmas lights and trees and other christmas stuff people had hung up. “I figured maybe we could walk around for a little bit first, you know, see the sights, smile at the strangers, do the things…” He trailed off. _

_ “Ok.” Cas smiled and slipped his hand slowly, tentatively, into Dean’s, squeezing it slightly. Dean couldn’t help but notice how well Cas’ slightly smaller hand seemed to fit into his perfectly, and how warm his hand was. “So where to first?” _

“Have you done your Christmas shopping yet?” Cas’ soft voice dragged him back to reality. 

“Haven’t needed to before today,” Dean almost whispered back. “No one special.” He paused. “In retrospect, a terrible thing to ask me, since I’d known you for about three seconds, and it was the beginning of November, but I’ll let it slide.”

“Hey!” Cas bumped into his side playfully. “I was nervous, and you being absolutely stunning wasn’t helping anything!”

Dean just pressed another soft kiss to the side of his forehead. 

They walked for a little longer, watching as people bustled around them, talking loudly and buzzing with adrenaline. Holiday spirit was starting to seep into the air, and you could almost see the barely contained excitement buzzing underneath everyone’s skin.

Dean suddenly felt a small tug on his arm, and he stopped, right in the middle of the sidewalk, to turn back and see Cas looking up at him. Cas’ blue eyes were sparkling with excitement. “Come on, just duck in here with me,” he offered, and Dean wordlessly agreed, allowing Cas to pull him off to the side, under the little canopy, and open the door for him. 

The moment he stepped inside, Dean was hit with the smell of coffee. Blinking as his eyes adjusted slightly, he looked around. There were little white lights strung up all over the small shop, and a few assorted booths, looking worn down. The whole place seemed to glow with a warm light. “Oh.”

Cas just smiled a little at him. “Come on, I saved us the booth by the window in the corner.” He nodded and smiled at the curly brown haired barista as he grabbed Dean’s hand and dragged him over. 

The barista came over briefly, keeping his eyes cast downward as he passed them two steaming cups of hot chocolate. 

_ “Come on, you need some hot chocolate.” Dean dragged Cas into a random coffee shop, proceeded to sit him at a small cozy corner of the cafe, march to the front, and order something, looking very important while doing so. _

They sat down, the large window next to them giving them a view of all of the pedestrians walking by. “Cas…” Dean could feel his heart swell with love. 

Cas gave him a tentative smile, one that was eerily similar to Jack’s. “Do you like it?”

“Like it? I love it! And… I love you.” Dean gazed at him with adoration, and a faint blush began to glow on Cas, coloring his cheeks a cherry red. “It’s the first place we ever went together, Cas, it’s perfect. You can relax.”

Cas let out a small chuckle at that. “You’ve just been so amazing recently, with Jack, and with me, and just… everything.”

“Cas,” Dean chastised him gently. “Remember what I said about positive vibes? I’ll always be here for you, no matter what.”

_ No time like the present, I guess... _

“Dean.” Cas took a small sip of his hot chocolate to calm his nerves.  _ It’s just Dean, you’ve seen him a million times, why should this be any different?  _ “I need to talk to you.”

“Okay?” Dean looked slightly nervous, but mostly still lovestruck as he mirrored Cas’ small sip of hot chocolate. 

“When I first met you, I was a different man. I was sad, and alone, and I had no purpose in life,” Cas began.  _ This isn’t scripted, just act natural.  _ “I was resentful of society, and I couldn’t see any kind of future for myself.” He ignored Dean’s small noise of protest. “All of that changed when I met you. You have are the the kindest, most inspirational man I have ever met. You raised your little brother practically on your own, and dealt with a father figure that you disagreed with. And the most important part of all of that is that you came out of it exactly the way you are today, loving and kind. You made me see a future for myself, Dean Winchester. And, I know it’s more of a formality at this point, with our whole society and all, but I was wondering,” Cas stood up, his legs shaking slightly, only to bend down on one knee, fumbling only slightly with the small velvet box in his pocket. “if you would do me the honor of becoming my husband?” He cracked open the ring box. 

There was a moment of silence, in which the whole shop seemed to freeze. 

“Yes,” Dean breathed out. “A million times over,  _ yes. _ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it. 
> 
> I should explain myself. I’ve been working on this fic for a year now, and if you scroll all the way back up to chapter one, you can see how much I’ve grown as a writer. The bittersweet part here is that I have other plans. School is a big part of this decision, as well as my other activities. I’m also planning a collab with a friend, and I have other works that I want to share with you guys! Because of this, I’m going to end this one here. Maybe not forever, but for a while. At least for now.
> 
> I want to thank each and every one of you guys! You’ve all been amazing. You stuck with me when I first started this fic off, you gave me a chance a year ago, when I could barely form articulate sentences. You read this, and you supported it, and that’s all I could ever have wanted.  
> So I figured, why not go out with a bang? Even though this story is rough and of debatable quality, it will always be one of the works that I’m most proud of. It was my baby for a year, and now, it’s like I’ve watched it grow up all on its own. I never had a direction to go in with this fic, and the only chapter I ever planned out was the last, but I’m so grateful for the experience. 
> 
> Okay, before I go, one last thank you to my amazing not quite beta readers, but more importantly, friends. Both of them have been with me for the duration of this story. Their usernames are as follows: Backbiter222 & pulpphiction .You can also find pulpphiction on tumblr with the same username. She draws amazing stuff! Please pop over and give them a look if you have time!
> 
> The End..?
> 
> Edit April 16, 2019: The first chapter of Fateless (sequel) is officially up!


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